Prankster Targeting Public Transport

People are getting so terrible! Yesterday someone got burnt by a substance while sitting on the train. Last week someone got hurt by acid poured onto a seat at a bus stop while sitting down waiting for a bus at that particular bus stop.

I wonder what people are thinking nowadays? Why does anyone want to do any action that deliberately hurt others physically? It is one thing having grievances with someone, but it is another thing altogether to hurt an innocent party one has totally no connection with.

Seems like even taking public transport is dangerous nowadays! What can one do? Take horses? Or carriage rides? I kind of like that idea actually. Imagine cruising through the countryside in a horse-drawn carriage. 

Who am I kidding? What countryside? There is nothing here but tall, modern, fierce-looking buildings! No more countryside and no more old buildings since money and power are more important than history and culture! What a waste!

Hopefully the people who did those pranks will get caught soon! They need some help as soon as possible to ensure they get treated for whatever illness they are suffering from.

Achieving CLARITY ...

I first heard of Clarity through a friend whom I confided in. Even though he is my parents' age, but he has been involved in helping mental patients and know about mental illness, hence I sought him out to talk about some stuff. So he recommended me to speak to someone at Clarity, and told me to do it quick if I intend for someone to seek help.

 

So I booked an appointment. The person my friend recommended me to is the Executive Director of Clarity when it was set up. She told me to come down today. I wanted an after work slot, but she said unfortunately the first appointment has to be during office hours, but subsequently if I need anymore help, it can be done after office hours.

 

I went down today and had to fill in a psychoanalysis test. After that the session began. The one who was "counselling" me said he is a psychotherapist who works with the psychiatric department of one of the hospitals, so if need be, he will refer people to psychiatrists for treatment and medication. Also I have to bear in mind that whoever needing treatment for mental health, it will be on a long term basis, and the moment the person stops the medication, everything else can relapse.

 

I came away from the session feeling a bit less confused. Even though my knowledge of mental health is still very limited, at least I know when some people do something, it is because they have a problem that make them do it, and not because they want to do it.

 

Obviously what they do is not justified and to most other people, totally horrifying, but with treatment and help, things can be better. Just that most people will immediately judge and ostracise these people if they so much as do something out of the ordinary without considering the deeper issues behind it.

 

I do agree with my friend that more ought to be done for people with mental health issues and that the general public should be educated more on this subject so they can start being more caring and understanding.

New Chain That Sparked Off Controversy

Recently the Philippino fried chicken restaurant Jollibee opened its doors here. Many people are delighted as they thought finally that famous chicken is opening here. On the day of its opening, there was already a very long queue before the restaurant even opened its doors.

 

As it is relatively new here (although it already has chains in different parts of the region), the management is looking to hire staff. Immediately, an uproar came up and there was even a social media page denouncing the place and boycotting the restaurant.

 

What sparked off the controvery is that in the recruitment poster, the poster stated that it is looking to hire staff. However, it did not state what kind of staff they need, so people automatically assume that since it is a Philippino restaurant, they would only hire their own kind, ie Filippinos.

 

Hence the uproar because locals feel that since it is opening at our shores, they should hire locals and not their own kind. The thing is, no where in the poster states that they are only hiring Filippinos, which means all are welcome to apply. So why the uproar? Sometimes I really think our locals have nothing better to do than to create hate mail.

 

Due to this, the next day, another poster was put up, this time stating that it is hiring locals or permanent residents, with an emphasis. And that appeased everyone. Are our locals so regimented that unless it is totally stated down in black and white, otherwise they would take it as the gospel truth? Can they not read in between the lines and take initiative to enquire?

 

Because of this hype, suddenly the outlet became even more popular than before. I went there last Saturday for lunch, and the queue was so long! It took me almost two hours before I could make my order. Even though the chicken pieces were nice (refer to my review here), I would not wait in queue for so long again. Perhaps after all the hype has died down and there is no more queue, I would go and try again. Right now, all the other chicken places like KFC, Popeye's and Texas is more than sufficient.

How To Determine Mental Illness?

Last night I went for another counselling session, and the counsellor recommended me some links to check up on mental illnesses as well as psychiatrists that he knows. In case any of you are wondering, no, I am not suffering from any form of mental illness, but I just thought these information would be useful because there are many people suffering from some form of mental illness around. Somehow mental illnesses seem more prevalent in modern society. Is it due to our highly stressed up and busy lives?

 

Essentially we talked about things like bipolar disorder, addiction of any form, and depression. Sometimes we come across someone who does things that are out of the ordinary. I am not talking about weird quirks which I believe everyone has, but things that normal people will not otherwise do, like excessive addiction of some form. Or someone who is suicidal, who is always being difficult to get along with, who has some form of extreme mood swings and tantrums. All these could be signs of mental illnesses.

 

The hard thing is to determine whether this person is suffering from mental illness, or he / she is just being a jerk in general. Personally I have come across at least three people in my course of life who may border on having mental illness. The thing about people is that, when someone behaves in an unorthodox way, the first conclusion is that people will think the person is just being difficult. Unfortunately, many people in general are not very kind or receptive towards people who are really sick in the mind.

 

It is all very good to avoid people who are psychotic in some form, but until you actually get to know someone who is like that, that is when the dilemma starts. Will you then ostracise a person because of the illness he or she is suffering, an illness which otherwise may have a possible cure through medication? Or will you just totally cut off contact with the person and leave him or her to their just deserts?

 

It is hard to answer that, is it not? I guess public opinion is that a mentally unsound person is dangerous. No doubt a mentally unsound person can be physically violent, but then again, many do not understand that the violence they have is probably due to their illness which makes them unable to control their behaviours or emotions. With medication and treatment, this can be helped.

 

However, how many people are willing to seek treatment? I do not think the victim himself is willing to admit he or she is sick in some form. More often than not, the person will always feel that he / she is alright, and this is how he / she is, and if people do not accept, so be it. Hence, many cases get unresolved because the person is not willing to go for treatment, and when this happens, their illness may get worse and dire consequences may arise.

 

In any case, it was a pretty informative session. At least it makes me realise and understand things from another point of view why certain things happen. It also makes me feel so priviledged that no matter what life throws at me, I am still pretty grounded. Anyone with weaker resilience may probably have crumbled. This makes me resolve to be more tolerant and understanding towards people who behave in a different way, and not just write them off or ostracise them without giving them a chance.

Why Do Fools Rush In?

I was on the train on my way back from work earlier, when this guy with a heavy backpack that looked as if he was holding several rocks inside, came squeezing into the train. Now taking the train during peak hour is no easy feat. Although it is not so bad as to be squeezed all the way into other carriages, but the train can be so full that sometimes we need to wait for several more trains to pass by before we can even get on.

 

Hence, in an already cramped space where people could hardly stand properly as it is, we do not welcome someone squeezing in with a gigantic and heavy backpack that ended up knocking into just about everyone! For goodness sake, if there is not much space, then at least hold on to your backpack or something? Or wait for the next train where there is enough space for two - the human and the bag!

 

I am sure people do not appreciate being knocked about in an already congested train with barely any standing room left!

The Funny Antics People Do ...

I just received an email on some work query from my colleague. It is a very simple question that can be answered in two words. It is no big deal, except she is seated directly opposite me and facing me! In that case, why can she not just raise her head and ask the question directly instead of emailing back and forth?!

 

I really do not understand human beings sometimes ...

Is There A Need To Pry Into Scandalous Affairs?

Yesterday the "big" news is on a politician resigning due to his confession of an extramarital affair with one of his staff. Does that kind of remind you of the unfortunate Bill Clinton and the intern? Ever since the news broke out, immediately the letter of resignation, speech from the other ministers and press conferences were published in major newspapers and online media.

 

Last night, the girl in question was found out, and her name and photo was published. Today the messages they sent to each other were published. I seriously wonder what is it with our local media nowadays? Yes, he did something wrong, yes, he regretted his action, yes, he decided to resign to atone for his mistakes, but honestly, must people dig out their entire story and broadcast to the public?

 

Can anyone imagine the distress to the parties in question and their families? So why must the media flashed out everything to remind the parties in question about what transpired, when they probably only wanted to forget this incident and start over anew? Is people's private lives so important to anyone else?

 

I am not saying that what he did was right. He should not cheat on his family in the first place, but then he is human after all. Everyone makes mistakes. Even though as a woman, this kind of mistake is unforgiveable and unacceptable, still, if his wife is willing to forgive him, that is all that matters, is it not? Why must others then pry into their affairs when they are already going through this difficult period?

 

I feel it is very brave of him to even stand up and admit to the mistake made. Not every man will do that. Most men will deny and give excuses, but he actually admitted his mistake and willing to take responsibility and face the consequences of his action. For that, I salute him for being a true man. So now that this is done, must people then distress the family and the other party further by digging up everything and flashing it as some "juicy" news?

 

For God's sake, leave them alone already! It is not the end of the world! How many of you men out there dare to say you would never cheat on your family or have never cheated on your family? Of course it is not the right thing to do and it is a blatant betrayal of your marriage vows, but everyone, men or women, may fall into temptation and succumb to weakness anytime. Would you then like the whole world to judge your actions when you are truly repentant?

 

I wish our local media would really report on true news instead of broadcasting people's private lives to everyone. It is really no one's business what transpired, and I really hope people can realise that - it is not their business and be more considerate to other's feelings and not judge and pinpoint mistakes that were already made.

From Prank To Suicide

Last week, the newly pregnant Princess Kate was hospitalised due to acute morning sickness. Prince William, as a good husband, visited her everyday, was with her when she discharged, and even cancelled some of his engagements to be by her side.

 

Honestly, I really do not see why this kind of thing is also considered "news". Afterall, it is their own private life, and when a woman is feeling so sick, she would not appreciate people updating about her status all the time.

 

To make matters worse, some idiots in a radio station thought it would be a good joke to impersonate the Queen and Prince Charles on air, and called the hospital, asking about the princess' condition. The nurse on duty thought it was true, and so updated the "Queen" and "Prince Charles" about the princess' condition.

 

I am sure she did it in all innocence. No doubt she should not be disclosing a patient's medical status, but on the other hand, if she really thought it was the Queen calling, I guess she felt obligated to disclose the medical condition of the princess. Little did she knew it was just a prank. When the hospital found out, they did not blame her and instead tried to see how situations like this could be improved. A few days later, her body was found in the nurse's quarters, most likely from suicide.

 

What started off as an "innocent" prank, albeit done in very bad taste, is now the indirect cause of an innocent person's death. What was originally a joke now became an international case, as the two radio personalities were put off air, hidden from sight, and now Scotland Yard is looking all over for these two pranksters to assist in their investigations of the nurse's death.

 

In the first place, why would anyone want to create this kind of mischief? I can just imagine the fury of the royal family. Yes, they are celebrities, but are they not entitled to their own privacy as well? Can people not let a pregnant lady in peace and not aggravate her? Afterall, her state of health and unborn child should be the utmost priority, is it not, rather than "sensational" news?

 

I have never condoned people for creating mischief. I mean, I am all for a good joke and whatnot, but a line has to be drawn. First, we should not take someone's life and experiences and create a joke out of it. Second, we should not take what someone say to you in confidence and treat it as a joke. Third, we should not even impersonate a real living person and take the real living person's sob stories and make a joke out of it.

 

One can just imagine the distress caused by someone else who wants to create that kind of mischief. This kind of prank is childish, in bad taste, and totally inconsiderate and oblivious of other's feelings. The two perpetrators really ought to be given a warning and stopped from ever presenting on air ever again.

Striking Hard?

The "big" news this week is on a group of bus drivers going on strike to ask for more pay. This group of bus drivers is another batch of "foreign talent" who were unhappy about the pay raise, as they felt the company discriminated against other "foreign talents", so they went on strike on Monday. Coincidentally, the chief executive officer happened to be on vacation so this was handled by other officials.

 

Come to think of it, even though we do not really have a strong union that protests against everything, most of us are relatively well-behaved, as in we go to work, go home and so be it. We accept overtime work without pay, accept whatever benefits and welfare of the company even though some may not be as impressive, and accept whatever vacation we were given. Besides, all companies have to adhere to local labour law, which, in my opinion, is pretty reasonable where employees are concerned.

 

However, this group of strikers wanted to take matters into their own hands. Yes, no doubt in their own country, they could strike whenever they felt things were unfair. But this is not their own country. Here, strikes are illegal, and for a tranport company which falls under "essential services", all the more they will be charged and made examples of.

 

But this strike does serve as a wake-up call that we should not be taking things for granted. We live in a relatively sheltered society, which is why whenever things fall out of the norm, we kick up a big fuss as we think things like that can never happen. But the fact is, all these things do happen, and they happen a lot in other countries, just that many people here are too narrow to realise that.

 

Case in point - the recent blaring out of racial-related stuff on one's personal page that went viral, causing the perpetrator to get terminated. I am not saying that is the right thing to do. Yes, her act was downright insensitive, but then again, in other countries, there are worse stuff being written on walls, houses and yelling on the streets.

 

Yet those people take it in their strides and accept it as part and parcel of life. It is only here that people make a very big deal out of it because things like that have never happened, hence they should not happen and those who behaved "out of the ordinary" should be spat upon, and oh, everyone should know who this person is and what the person looked like so we could throw daggers at the picture.

 

Is this really necessary? Ok, the person had done a wrong thing, ok, the drivers are on strike, so what next? Striking is illegal here, and if their demands were given in, then everyone else would strike, but if their demands were not given, then what? Some people would then think we are an unfair society who only wanted our own way. Either way, it is hard to come to a consensus.

 

What will happen to the drivers in question? They may end up losing their jobs. They may even be charged. But whatever it is, I believe the authorities will make an example out of this case to prevent others from doing similar things. I hope this case comes to a conclusion soon as I am really interested to find out how the authorities will handle this.

Of Foreign Talents ...

After all the debate going around about restricting foreigners while the elections were going on last year, one of the first thing our new Parliament did was to have more restrictions on foreigners finding work here.

 

In the past, there were lesser restrictions. Much as companies try to give priorities to our locals, but anyone with the qualifications and experience could find a job here. Now, it is getting harder for foreigners as our locals complained that foreigners are taking all our jobs away, so the jobs will be all reserved to our locals, unless the foreigner is on an overseas posting here.

 

This is happening everywhere. Even places like Australia and Hong Kong, where it used to be easier for foreigners to work there, now there is hardly a chance, as the countries give priorities to their own people.

 

Not only jobs, even university places. A lot of university places are opened up to foreigners who have never studied here, whereas the locals who did well enough were deprived of a place. On the other hand, many people here went overseas to study, so would the concept not be the same?

 

I never know there are so many xenophobic people around. Of course, if foreigners come and benefit us, I believe they would never complain. But once foreigners start taking over our jobs, being paid a lot and the benefits do not come to us, people will sure complain. Such is human nature, especially those who are born and bred here.

 

One case in point - the Olympic team. Our government paid a lot of "foreign talents" to come and play for us, given them residency and when they win, it is to our benefit and not to their countries. But some are not happy, saying that if we want a true representation of our country, we should get locals to play!

 

But then have they ever considered, why are the locals here so lacking in sports and music? It is because since young, our parents drilled us to study, and not waste time playing sports or music. If we ever say we want to be a sportsperson or musician, our parents would shoot us down and tell us to dream about being a doctor, lawyer, engineer or whatnot instead.

 

Not so for other countries. The gifted ones were discovered at a young age. After that they were put under training to develop their skills, so by the time they reach their late teens, they were able to shine. But these do not come without sacrifices. They did not go through a normal academic study, they went through a different syllabus, but their studies mainly concentrated on sports or music to develop their gift to the fullest.

 

There is no such system here. Everything is so academic based. Yes, now there are secondary schools exclusively for music, arts and sports, but in order to enter these schools, one must score very well acacdemically in the first place before they can be considered. There are many others who could be equally, or even more talented, but because they did not do that well academically, they were not even considered.

 

So what does this say? Academic results still hold the power? There are many others who may not be able to score well academically, but they could be a gem in the sports or music field. Yet they are being overlooked simply by not being "smart"? Why must these people lose out because they did not score as well in other subjects? And that is why we are not able to nurture really talented people!

 

In this globalised and cosmopolitan society, it is inevitable that foreigners will come in. Instead of griping about it, why not we just work together and do our part? I have worked with foreigners before, and it is really a great learning experience because it widens up one's horizons in how other people handle matters. One has so much to learn from each other.

 

Having said that, if foreigners want to come here to study and work, then at least behave themselves and not be an embarrassment to their own country and culture. One example is this scholar who set up a sex blog, and got his scholarship revoked. If he is to continue his studies here, he would need to pay the full price.

 

Another case is a senior executive from a prominent bank who got terminated from his employment for creating a scene with foreign construction workers. It is good to work overseas to gain exposure and experience, but one must be more aware of one's behaviour and not make a nuisance out of ourselves, as the laws everywhere is different. What may be acceptable to your own country may not be so in other countries.

Is There A Price Tag On Love?

I was reading Violet's latest article on her blog, and her Facebook page, and that particular article generated some heated discussion online. The reason is because one of the ladies said that her criteria for finding a guy is that he must earn a minimum of S$6,000.00 a month, which got slammed by the guys, but supported by the ladies.

 

Men said she is materialistic and a gold-digger. Some men even said if she wants the guy to earn a certain amount, then she herself should also earn that amount. Some men said if she wants a guy to earn a certain amount, then she must be pretty and gorgeous in the first place to be able to match with that kind of guy.

 

Whereas most women said that it is not an unreasonable request. The living expenses here are such that the median income for minimal expenses (normal public housing, small car, raising two kids, household expenses, transport, etc) is about S$6,500.00. Hence, women said asking for a mininum of S$6,000.00 is not unreasonable, in fact, it is already the bare minimum.

 

I guess the median income of S$6,500.00 is realistic because housing loans itself can kill you. Where in the world can you find a small public flat with two to three bedrooms that cost a minimum of S$300,000.00, and that is already in a very inconvenient area without any facilities and amenities? If you live near a train station with facilities like food centre, grocery shop, etc, then the price can be even S$500,000.00 or thereabouts. With that kind of price, I can own a mansion overseas!

 

Honestly, even after working for so long, whatever I have saved up is not even enough to get a small flat! Most people have to take loans as even with dual-incomes, their combined incomes are still not enough to get a normal flat! And depending in your age and tenure, the loan can be twenty to thirty years, with at least S$2,000.00 being paid back every month!

 

That is just for housing loan. What about if one has kids and feel it is more convenient to get a car to drive the children around? Where in the world can you find cars, even a small Suzuki Swift wihch is like the cheapest car here, that cost S$70,000.00 minimum for a new car? And that is not including the certificate of entitlement which one has to bid for, in order to even own a car. And that can cost around the same price as the cost of the whole car at a bare minimum, unless one happens to be lucky to get the bidding at a very low rate, which does not happen often. So it is another S$140,000.00 into the car, with car loans adding to another at least S$1,000.00 every month. With that kind of price, I can drive a sports car overseas!

 

That is not including household expenses like water and electricity, food, entertainment, upbringing of kids, sending them to pre-schools (pre-schools can cost around S$800.00 every month even with subsidy). So one does the mathematics and see how much a normal household needs as a bare minimum.

 

Having said that, I never believed in having a price tag to love. I have never asked that the guy I am with must earn a certain amount. In fact, as far as I remember, I have never dated anyone of that "price range", nor have I dated anyone who even earns more than me. I never question what the guy's income is too unless we are of a serious stage of commitment. Nor do I state what kind of jobs he must be in.

 

Unless the guy is a doctor, lawyer, banker or director of some company, chances are he will never be able to reach the minimum S$6,000.00 a month. And how many doctors, lawyers, directors and bankers can one find? Even if can find, they may either be married, or gay, or non-committal. Honestly, I have not even sniffed that amount even after working for so long. My income is way below that. Most of us are normal workers with average incomes. So is the nature of the job or the income really the be all and end all of considering a lifelong partner?

 

I just want someone I can get along with. I do not need a guy to give me a luxurious life, nor bring me to the ends of the earth, nor bring me fine dining all the time. I am also working, I also have my own keep, so why should I need a man to bring me to do all these things, when I am more than capable of doing all these on my own?

 

I just want someone who can be in partnership with me and we are each other's mutual support, who can work together to create a good life for both of us. That is why I never question a guy's income, because if I like him, there must be something that attracted him to me in the first place, and not because of how much net worth he has.

 

If one base a relationship on net worth, then is the person really committed to the guy or to the money? Does it mean to say if the guy no longer has the capability to earn that much, or if he ever goes bankrupt, or lose his job and has to take something lower, she will leave him for someone richer?

 

When has love started to become so calculative? True love should never be calculative. To me, a real committed relationship is when both get together, know what they are in for, and then work out all problems along the way together. It is really for richer or poorer, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, till death do them part.

 

If a woman manages to find someone who earns a lot to give her a luxurious life, then she is very lucky. Not everyone is so lucky. Most of us work together with our partners, contribute together, and carve out a better lives for ourselves and our families. If someone is to put a price tag on love, then would the person not be losing out on someone who may be right, even if the person does not come in the exact "package" she wants?

 

Imagine you find a guy who earns S$10,000.00. Yet he is so controlling, wants everything done his way, never respects his wife, puts such a tight rein on his finances and refuses to contribute more, and yet still expects the wife to contribute more and puts her down when she does not earn as much as he likes.

 

Then imagine another guy who earns say S$4,000.00. But he gives whatever he can to his family, never asking his wife to contribute, and he respects his wife and loves his family. His family's welfare and happiness is everything to him.

 

Which guy would a woman prefer? Many would say the first guy, simply because he earns more. But does that mean a guy with more earning power entitles him to be a jerk? Personally, I would prefer the second guy.

 

I always feel even if you find someone who is richer, he may not necessarily give you happiness. Likewise, someone who may not be that rich, you may actually be happy with the person. The problem is most people nowadays, they want to put a price tag to love, and once the person does not meet up in terms of net worth, he is dropped without even getting a chance.

 

No wonder there are so many singles out there because people are not able to see beyond the price tag and see the person for who he or she is. And that is a sad thing indeed, as they may probably find themselves lonely for the rest of their lives, with so much money but no one to share with.

Lost And Never Found

My dear lost his bag on Saturday. We were in a cab on our way home (as in my place) around seven in the evening, when he realised he left his bag in the cab after we reached home. I was actually quite upset, as I had told him time and again to take care of his things properly, but he is still so absent-minded. He ever left something of mine in a cab before, and had to go around the whole island looking for that and called the cab company for that, but luckily the cab driver was very nice and came back to my place to pass me the item.

We tried calling the cab company, but because it was Saturday night and we did not note down the number since it was a flag-down and not an advance call, we had to lodge a report. The main office was closed and I was told we had to wait until the cabbie brought the bag in as lost-and-found.

It has been a few days now, and nothing has come in. I called the cab company again and I was told no one has lodged any report on any missing item. We tried telling them part of the cabbie's name and described the cab, but was told they could not do anything without the cab number.

What a service! And people seem to be so dishonest, we have this feeling that someone took the cab after us, saw the bag and could easily just took it for themselves since it looked quite new and many people would like the brand.

I guess we just happened to be unlucky. Serves him right! Let's hope after this, he finally knows how to take care of his own things without the need to be constantly reminded!

Disappointing Day Back At Work

Today is one of the most disappointing days at work. I was away for two days for training, and back at work today, I was reprimanded by not meeting deadlines and not being committed enough to the job. I was upset and bewildered over what happened, when I realised because of the fact that I was away, and had no access to any emails since I left my laptop back in the office, some people sent some documents straight to my General Counsel, saying that I did not reply to them and the case was urgent.

Furthermore, my boss was not happy with the fact that while undergoing the work training and brainstorming session two weeks back, I was half checking emails at the same time. But that was because I had so many urgent matters to take care of, hence I was checking the emails.

He even compared to my predecessor, saying she won the Employee of the Year every year ever since she joined. Yes, I know she was good, I know she did a lot, but I do not think it is fair to compare this way, because everyone has their own working style, and I needed some time to adjust completely. I may have experience but still, things are quite different here than in my previous company, so I really need some time to ensure everyone is happy.

I just feel so disappointed because ever since I joined, I felt I had done my best. In fact, I had been busier than ever as compared to my previous work places, and I tried to learn as much as I can. Yet two weeks back, I was told I would not be confirmed, simply because I do not meet up to the standards, as yet.

Then what is the standard? Why not tell me exactly what they need instead of telling me that I do not meet up? If I am really doing anything wrong, why not let me know instead of asking me to figure it out for myself?

I really cannot lose another job, especially since this is one that is giving me so many opportunities from before! But if this goes on, even if I do not leave, I may just be asked to leave. Then what? How shall I tell any potential employer or headhunter the reason I left after just a few months? What will that look on me?

Looks like I seriously need some peace and quiet to pray and seek help on what to do and where to go from here!

Is Human Cloning Ethical?

We went to watch the movie "Never Let Me Go", based on the book by Kazuo Ishiguro, about a group of school kids who were cloned and brought up to be organ donors to "real" humans. I had mixed feelings after the show. No doubt the book is good (the author has his own style of writing that one either gets it or does not get it), and the movie captured the essence of the book, but still, the show left me wondering if it is even ethical to clone?

Just about a decade ago, there was a sheep who was successfully cloned, and she even had lambs with a male sheep. Since then, scientists have been trying to clone other things, most recently, humans. In the show, these "clones" are considered "duplicates", second class to the "originals", hence it is their organs who would be used to save "real" humans. Most of these "clones" could only have three organ donations before they themselves die off.

It is possible to defer the donation, provided one becomes a carer (caregiver to the donors), but even then, that would only be deferred for a couple of years the most. Once the donors are dwindling, the carers would be called upon to become donors.

Upon watching this show, I could not help but express my anger at the society that made these clones, giving them hope when young but actually they have no hope because they would all serve a purpose and die at a young age.

Which led me to the question : Is it even ethical to clone a human to take their organs, because "real" humans would not want to donate their organs? If we are to create a life, then should the life not be treated as a normal life, instead of a low-class duplicate? Afterall, I believe Dolly got all the care and concern from her "owners" before she passed away. No one used her to experiment on other sheep.

As of now, there has not been any human clone, as the DNA for humans are too complicated to make cloning successful. It is a relief though. In the near future, who knows, with society progressing the way it is and science and technology advancing everyday? But for now, I truly hope and pray that there will not be anyone trying to play God and create a "super" human, because that is going against nature and to me, I always feel being natural is the best.

Are People Getting Too Competitive?

The Cycling Challenge was a great achievement for me. I broke my own record. I never knew I could actually cycle so far and even got a medal to show for it! However, while on the road, I faced a few people who kind of upset me. And they are all men! How typical!



All of them passed by me while I was struggling, and jeered, booed, spoke loudly that I was holding up traffic, that the whole world was waiting for me alone, and something to that effect. Is it because I am a woman, hence the man just cannot resist looking down on me? I never see any woman doing that!



In the first place, can they not see that I was struggling along? Even if they do not wish to help me (which I do not expect them to), at least spare the jeers and laughs because that is very unkind and not helping the situation at all. If someone is struggling, how is laughing at the person going to be of any help? I am already in a stressed-up mood, I do not need all these jeers to help out my situation!



The Cycling Challenge may be called a "challenge" but it is not a competition. There is no first prize or second prize or third prize and no consolation prizes. Everyone gets a goodie bag as a reward for completing the challenge, that is all. Nothing else. So why do people then want to always rush ahead to be the first and laugh at everyone else who were not as fast or good?



Is it due to our fast-paced society, that people do not know how to show compassion to those who are slower or not as good? Yes, we are all involved in the rat race, especially in a highly stressed city, but then must everything be a competition? If we are competing to win an award in school or work, that is still okay.



But people are competing in everything else and laugh at everyone else who is not as good. For instance, when I played tennis, just because I could not manage to catch the ball, my tennis partner(s) would then laugh at me and then want to tell me what to do and how to do and told me not to spoil the game or make them lose. Well, it is just a game after all, is it so important who win or who lose?



People are competing over everything else, yet the biggest irony is that we lose out big in social graces, courtesy and strength of character. Everyone is so competitive nowadays, everyone wants to be first that they start caring for themselves and become so self-centred, that as a result, they no longer think about others, no longer care about others, no longer say please or thank you, they just take for granted everything has to be their way and their benefit, without caring about the rest. And if they do not get it, they start throwing tantrums and thinking the whole world owes them a living.



I am starting to be afraid of the kind of world I am living in, and the kind of world my own future kids will be born into. It makes me think twice whether should I even let a kid come into this cruel, merciless, selfish world?

Hypocrites!

I really cannot stand hypocrites! Alright, I may be guilty of that too since none of us are perfect. But what I really cannot tolerate is saying something and then doing otherwise. No doubt everyone makes mistakes, so be it, we learn and move on. But why do you have to tell people not to do something when you yourself does it?



For instance, I know of someone who told his son not to judge people from their appearances and get to know the person. Yet he himself judge from first impression, saying that this person must be bad or whatnot, without even giving the person a chance or getting to know the person. Then what for tell his own kid otherwise? Is that not being very hypocritical?



I also know of people who are very nice and sincere and all smiling to you at work, but in the end are the ones who stab you in the back the most and put you down the most. In that case, why do they have to pretend to be nice and that everything is all fine and dandy? Do people think others have no feelings whatsoever?



The worst hypocrites are those who claim they are your friends, but when something happens, they are the first to ostracise and judge you, or claim they are staunch Christians, yet turn around and lead all the sinful lives. How would these people like it if they are in the same shoes?



On one hand, should we even judge a person because if we are not in the shoes, we may never be able to understand how the person is feeling? On the other hand, humans, being the way they are, it is inevitable they start judging and ostracising and going on the high horse and start preaching.



But should we then do otherwise and participate in the gossip and ostracising simply because we want to be part of a "group"? The reason I was not "welcomed" in my previous workplaces simply because I spend the time on work and not gossip or hang around talking about others. I always feel I have better things to do, and before I start criticising, I am not perfect myself.



Hence I never like to be a hypocrite nor people to be hypocritical to me. If there is anything wrong, I prefer to be told in the face, rather than behind my back. And if people told me not to do something, the person better not do the same thing because that is being the most hypocritical of all.

Shaping Women In The Next Twenty-Five Years

Today I went for a forum for AWARE's 25th anniversary, in the theme of "Shaping Women In The Next Twenty-Five Years". The session is rather informative on how far women have come since twenty-five years ago when AWARE was first set up. Before that, there were already people being aware of women's issues, hence came out with the Woman's Charter, the only statute that protects women and children under the law.



The session talked on issues facing women now and in the near future, like foreign brides, women at home and at work. For instance, no matter what, women will still never draw the same salary as men, women are still expected to marry, have kids, work, contribute to the household, yet do the housework, take care of the kids, take care of the husband, take care of the in-laws, and manage the household. I seriously wonder what exactly men are doing, if they always claim they are the "better" sex! Life is always so unfair to women!



There is also a forum on research areas on women's issues, like marginalisation of women, single mothers, women at work, more maternity or paid leave, equal contribution to household (not just in monetary sense but also in terms of housework, cooking, cleaning and child rearing).



All I can say is that women have come far all these while, and it is because of people like these who care of women's issues that we are able to achieve many more things than many of our mothers and grandmothers ahead of us. Well, I cannot say for myself because my mother herself is a great woman who has achieved a lot more things than me. If I am to have a role model, I will model myself after my mum, who is not just successful in her career, but has also committed and contributed greatly to the household and the family and extended family.



But at least the future of women do not look as bleak. No longer are women subjugated to men and end up being the subservient ones because they have nowhere else to go. Nowadays women are equally educated, many more educated than their male counterparts, more capable, stronger and more successful, so we no longer have to listen to a man or follow whatever he says. And if men nowadays cannot tolerate that, then they are losers indeed and the world will be better off without men like that.

Date Renting?

I do not know about other countries where Lunar New Year is celebrated, but here, most singles I know dread the festive period, because it is the time for well-meaning yet busy-body relatives to ask, "So how old are you now?", "How come you are still single?", "When are you getting married?" and a whole series of related questions.

I used to get that all the time too, and I always shrug it off. They are just concerned and harmless. Besides, if they do not ask this, they would have nothing to talk to me about. But to many people of my generation, festive periods became a drag because they had to fend off all those questions, and concerned looks and the little gossiping behind their backs. People made it seem as if being single is a cardinal sin.

Hence this year, some dating agencies came up with the concept of date renting. Simply put, someone can go ask for a date just for the festive period. One way of looking at it is that the guy can bring the girl out visiting, pass her off as his girlfriend and then shut his relatives out. The guy is happy, the relatives are happy, the girl had fun, and both got to know each other.

Perhaps something could even develop out of this, provided they do keep in touch. But knowing the way local guys function, most likely they will want an ego boost, hence they may choose the prettiest and most elegant girls to be rented out, and then what? After the festive period, when the girl's "services" are no longer needed, what then? Will they still keep in contact, or will they just totally drop out of each other's lives as per the norm?

Okay, I make this sound like some kind of social escort. Forgive me if this is what it sounded like, but I feel the reason why local guys are still single is mostly on their own mentality and their social behaviour. They do not initiate contact, nor do they bother to keep in touch. I have experienced my fair share of these when I was under dating agencies.

The agency set up a date with you, hoping you two meet and then continue getting to know each other, but I notice guys simply do not bother. It is like they just want to meet the girl for the first time and that is it. If she does not match up to his looks, height, elegance, slimness or trophy girl criteria, he would not even bother behaving himself the rest of the date.

Then why bother spending the money and time if all you want is a trophy girl and not to actually go beyond the looks and give the girl a chance? I am not talking about those who look really frumpy or dowdy, but those girls who take pride in their appearance and spend time looking good for the date, yet the guys just give her a glance off and totally lose interest just because he thinks she is not pretty enough.

There are also some events where the organisers want many males and females to get together to socialise. The idea is socialise, not sit there and stare into thin air. Yet when people go for events like these, they are more interested to be the first in the buffet line than to actually talk to others, let alone the opposite sex.

Furthermore, men got scared off when a woman initiates the conversation, as if she is an alien. I believe I have mentioned before, if a man does not initiate a conversation and a woman initiates, why get scared off? Does he think every woman is willing to sit down and stare at him like what he does?

Ultimately, date renting only works if the girl is treated with the kind of respect as per a normal lady, and not as a social escort, used only to boost the man's ego and then totally forgotten after that. No girl is obligated to pander to a man's family if she is not involved with him, and for girls who are willing to be rented out, maybe it is for fun, for meeting new people, and also she too can escape her well-meaning relatives during this period. Hence guys please respect that and do not brush her off just because you think she is not supermodel material.

The bottom line is, both are doing each other favours, so respect each other and respect each other's families, and do it in the name of fun. What happens after that is up to the individual, but one should not use this opportunity to show off or satisfy one's ego in front of others.

ASEAN Women's Rights And Child Protection

Today we went for a talk given by AWARE (a female rights group) on the role and treatment of women in Asia. Initially I thought the talk would touch on how women were discriminated around the ASEAN region, but it turned out that the talk was more on the various (or lack of) support groups that are helping the women who were discriminated.

I am not really a feminist, although some may disagree. I go for events like these for information sake, but I do not go all out to fight for equality of the sexes.

All I am saying is that, with the evolution of society, the roles of men and women are now less defined. There is no longer things like an exclusively man's job or an exclusively woman's job anymore. In this case, there should be less gender discrimination and more equality in terms of pay packages.

In any case, it was a rather interesting talk. It is good to know that women around the region can find help and support too, that they are not alone in their sufferings.

There are more interesting talks coming up, but I am so tied up until February that I do not think I have the time to attend any of those. Hopefully more of these interesting talks will come along throughout the year!

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An Amazing Woman ...

Yesterday I met an amazing woman for lunch. It was a group lunch so I did not really manage to speak with her, and she is more his friend than mine.

Still, it was a great pleasure meeting her. She is pretty, tall, elegant, smart and she was from my school too, several batches my senior.

She was a former Miss Singapore Universe, has both a Masters in Arts in General Linguistics and a Masters in Science in Information Systems (and she was pursuing the two Masters concurrently while juggling a full-time job and preparing for the Miss Singapore and Universe pageants), and a PhD in General Linguistics. She married and is now exchanging discourse and discussions with all the great academics around the world.

Which is why I say she is an amazing woman! Who says women cannot have it all - beauty, elegance, sophistication, brains, family, education and friends? She is such an inspiration that I yearn so much to be like her!

Unfortunately men (at least in local context) get put off by smart, successful and educated women. Many men here still want trophy girlfriends - a woman who is seen but not heard, someone pretty whom he can show off to others, yet someone who is not that smart so he can still control her. Hence the more educated and sophisticated women here tend to remain single because the men do not seem to be able to have the confidence to date better-quality women.

Which is why she is my inspiration because here is one woman who truly has it all! And no, her husband is not local, hence not feel overwhelmed or put off by her elegance and intelligence.

How I wish I can be like her too! Perhaps one day I can also add a couple of Masters and even a PhD to my name! And I will also still have a partner and a few kids in tow too at the same time!

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