White Swan, Black Swan

This is by far one of the most intense movies I have ever watched! How did it lose out to Social Network during the Golden Globes I really cannot fathom! This is more of a psychological drama, where a ballerina who pushed herself too much, and started hallucinating about others trying to take on her role, and in the end she killed herself, thinking she killed the person who was "tormenting" her, before realising everything was in her mind, and her "tormentor" was in fact really herself.

But this show took on a new meaning for me. I have always loved the ballet "Swan Lake", and ever since I watched it two years back, I have always been awestruck by the gracefulness of the main character.

But this show brought out the essence of the ballet - Swan Lake itself is on the beauty and gracefulness of the white swan, and the jealousy, sensual, and backbiting of the black swan (the alter ego of the white swan). The white swan represents purity, sweetness and wholesomeness, whereas the black swan represents deceit, lies and lust.

I never really saw it that way, as all along, I thought the white swan is the good one and the black swan is the bad one, and the ballerina who took on the role just needed to ensure her dance steps are perfect, but after what the ballet master in the show remarked, "We have a perfect 'white swan', and a perfect 'black swan', but trouble is, who can play both?", I started to reflect on this point.

How true! Yes, even in staging a ballet, drama and expression are important. One can glide around gracefully and elegantly as the white swan, and one can piroutte sensually like the black swan, but who can actually do both and bring out both qualities at the same time? This kind of symbolises that humans have many faces, sometimes the good surfaces, and sometimes the ugly surfaces, and yet not many people can be both a Dr Jeckyll and Mr Hyde at the same time without repercussions to the mental well-being.

And that is the overall essence of the show. The main character could not do it. She could not surface both her white swan and black swan qualities, which was why she kept pushing herself and met her tragic end, even though she managed to achieve a breakthrough in the end and the show was overall a great success and received a standing ovation.

I give the movie a standing ovation too! It is one of the best movies I have watched! I sure hope this will win the Best Picture at the Academy Awards! Incidentally, seeing all the ballerinas piroutte and gliding so gracefully, makes me really yearn to want to dance again after so long! Maybe I can start to lose some weight too by doing that!

Demanding Only The Best

It has been a while since I did any reading, as in real book reading, not articles over the internet or magazine or newspaper reading. I needed to refresh some books I have read in order to help me with my studies, when I came across this quote from Somerset Maugham :

"It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it."

How true it is! That is why I never go for second best, or third best. No one and nothing is perfect, but if you demand the best for yourself and everyone else, often than not you will get it. This is tried and tested, especially for me in the last couple of years. It is all in the mind! Only by demanding and expecting the best that one can improve and get the best of what we want, be it in terms of friends, jobs, studies, even relationships!

So if you think you are satisfied with just anything mediocre, chances are that is what you will get! So it is one's choice whether they want the best or anything less!

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Psychology ....

I went for another counselling session last night and my counsellor wants to see me again next month. Oh well, if I am going to fall into depression again, it will be good if someone holds me at the other end.

I feel there is a big injustice to counsellors or social workers in general. They are psychologically-trained, so able to study the behavioural and thought patterns of an individual, and help them as much as possible.

Then why are they being so much lesser-paid than psychiatrists? Is it because psychiatrists are medically-trained, and they treat mental illnesses? But there is only a thin line between someone on the verge of mental breakdown and someone actually breaking down.

Psychology was actually one of the subjects I was interested in. Perhaps it was just as well I did not enter Arts after all, because I would be at a loss which subjects to choose. If given a choice, I would have taken English Literature, History, Psychology, Philosophy, Political Science, Sociology and Social Work, but alas, students could only choose up to two majors and one minor.

The only form of psychology I studied was two modules of Educational Psychology, plus one elective of Basic Counselling Skills, where there are theories after theories of children's behaviour and mindset. Needless to say, theories and practical often do not interface. Whatever one studied is normally never utilised since the actual scenario is so much different.

If I am to do psychology, I will want to study the criminal mind. A former law coursemate actually went to Australia to further her studies in Criminology and Justice Studies. She initially wanted to try for a post in the Police Force, but somehow her application was not approved.

Humans are interesting creatures. Which is why psychologists and psychiatrists are having so much business. And being a counsellor is pretty meaningful when he / she can help people with their problems and assess the different ways people think.

But the most interesting would be the criminal mind. What makes one want to commit a crime? What makes one want to do something illegal? Is it a case of split personality or schizophrenia? How would the person feel while committing the crime?

Because if one can get the psychology behind the crime, it makes the modus operandi and motives so much easier to fall into place.