"Classic" Book Sale!

I went for a book sale during lunch earlier. I did not expect to get anything because in my experience, most of the time in those book sales, I can never find any good books, or find any books that I do not already have. Still, I went to take a look just in case.

 

Luckily I did because I found some "treasure"! I bought four original unabridged "olde" editions of Wilkie Collins' "Moonstone", the two-in-one Robert Louis Stevenson's "Treasure Island" and "Kidnapped", two-in-one H G Wells' "War of the Worlds" and "The Time Machine", as well as Emily Bronte "Wuthering Heights", all for S$20.00! What a bargain!

 

And these books are in good condition! I am really pleased with the purchase of "Moonstone" because it is hard to find this book nowadays. Most bookstores only stock Wilkie Collins' more famous "Woman In White".

 

Here are the books I bought :

 

 Front and back of Wilkie Collins' "Moonstone"

 

 Front and back of Robert Louis Stevenson's "Treasure Island" and "Kidnapped"

 

 Front and back of H G Wells' "War of the Worlds" and "The Time Machine"

 

Front and back of Emily Bronte's "Wuthering Heights"

 

There is another one which is reddish cover, Charles Dicken's "Oliver Twist". But since if I buy four I can get a discount, whereas if I buy five, the remaining one will be extra, I decided to just buy four of the books I wanted the most.

 

I hope there will be more book sales around so I can find more "treasure" again!



On A Reading Frenzy?

All of a sudden, I am having a reading marathon. I used to have these "read-a-thons" back in my school days when there was nothing much to do, since my parents did not allow me to go out nor watch any television, so when I was bored, I started reading. And a good thing it is, because I always feel nowadays many people do not read enough.

In any case, in recent years, my reading has decreased drastically. One reason is work. You spend all hours working and really have no time to do anything else. Another reason is social life. When I start going out with friends, having fun, then later started being involved in religious work and then started dating, one really does not have that much time for one's own leisures anymore.

I used to average twenty-five books a month, then later on ten books a month, and now, it seems to be a good thing if I can even finish one book a month. That is how much I have deteriorated. So this year, I made a resolution to myself to go through at least two books a month, and slowly increase along the way.

For the past two weeks, I have finished three books. Not a bad feat! I started reading again on public transport, while I was on the bus or the train. I started reading when I was out with my boyfriend, when we were waiting for the bus or train or just waiting for the food to come. By doing this, I realise I can get through a book much quicker.

Now my love for reading has increased. I have always been passionate about books and the beauty of the words in a page, but I have never imagined ever giving it lesser priority than anything else in my life. I totally regret doing that, because reading is really a pleasure beyond any description.

I will never let my love of the books slide again! I plan to go through at least two books a month and more if possible!

Cultivating Readers ...

Just two weeks into my new tutoring assignment, I got an email that really made my blood boil. In case I have not mentioned, in this new assignment, I was to tutor a four-year-old Russian girl, who is in kindergarten. Each session is one hour, which is nothing much I can really do during that time. Further more, she could not sit still, like any other child her age.

But instead of ensuring the girl got all the discipline, the parents blamed me for not teaching her how to read after two lessons and wanted to terminate the class. In the first place, can any child learn to read in just two hours? In the second place, the parents speak rather good English themselves, so instead of relying on external help, why could they not start off on their home?

But this is not the only family. During my own days in the education industry, I have come across many instances where parents rely on teachers and tutors to ensure the kids do well, without the parents themselves chipping in. Teachers and tutors can only do so much, but the very people whom the kids take after and look up to are the parents. Hence the foremost educator of the children are actually their own parents.

Now in this day of outsourcing, many parents conveniently outsource their children's education and upbringing to external parties. But humans are not like a job or a machine. One can outsource a job, a machine, any other technological gadgets, but one simply cannot outsource education and upbringing of the children. Despite teachers, tutors, domestic helpers and whatnot, parents still play the most fundamental role in the cultivating of the children.

I know everyone is busy. Nowadays everyone work late. Many travel frequently for work. Everyone is struggling making ends meet. We do not even have time for ourselves, let alone for other people. I can understand a little. Which is why many prefer not to have children or have just one just so they do not get more emotionally taxed than usual.

But still, if a couple chooses to have children, then it is their responsibility to bring up the child, is it not? A parent's love is not just bringing in money and buying the best things for the child, it is also the time spent to cultivate, nurture, communicate and educate the child. What is the use of having a child only to neglect or place him in the care of someone else?

I cannot profess I am that well-brought up, but I believe my mum did a good enough job. Even though she still thinks she can control my life, but still, without her, I can never be who I am. She was the one who cultivated my love for reading, who tried to bring me up bilingually, who tried to inculcate the right values in me, who tried to bring me up as a good person.

And I think she has succeeded somewhat. I am not flawless, but at least I have no vices and I am pretty grounded in my values, because they have been inculcated since young. Even though I always wish she can be more open-minded and not the ultra conservative typical kind of Asian parent, still I think I am not a bad person per se.

Hence the parents play the most part. If they do not spend time with the kids, who can they blame if the kids grow up not being close to them? Similarly, if parents themselves do not read, how are they going to cultivate readers? I am lucky in the sense that both my parents love to read, so since young, I have been surrounded by books, but I know most of my friends do not read. As in do not read for leisure, they only read on how to make more money or how to make their investment grow instead of real fiction leisure reading, and the heavy literature I read.

And I feel sad for their own kids, because if both the parents do not read, they will not introduce books to the kids since young, and the kids grow up not knowing the joy of flipping page after page digesting a good book, and spend the time playing violent computer games, where they may grow up becoming mass murderers or shallow in their thinking.

Thus cultivating readers start from parents themselves, and have to start from young. Even if I cannot remember everything else my parents ever did for me, the only thing I can really remember is they cultivated my love for reading. I mean reading books and not reading from the internet or a computer screen. And that is something I intend to pass on, and hopefully my own future children will pass on too.

Is Print Media Obsolete?

Will print media soon be extinct? Nowadays with modern technology like the Internet, Amazon kindle, iPad, smartphones and other kinds of electronic media, do people still read books and magazines since now everything can be found online?

But I notice not many people read. I do not know about other countries but here, not many people I know actually read. Or rather read for leisure. Whatever reading they do will be for school or work, or else read on how to make money. Hence writers like Nicholas Sparks will never be able to survive here as there is no market for fiction books.

Because not many people read, when they have kids, they do not encourage their kids to read too. And when these kids have kids, they, too, do not read. And the generation goes on.

Which is sad, is it not? Are people getting so materialistic now that as long as it is not a money-making venture, no one bothers to improve their knowledge in other ways? Or else they say why bother buying books when everything can be read off the screen?

Hence the new generation will never be exposed to all the great books we have read, like Enid Blyton and Roald Dahl, two authors I have loved in my childhood days.

How can a screen be compared to the feeling of a book in your hands? How can a screen be as portable as a paperback while travelling?

How can anyone not be lost in the beauty of the language when a great writer publishes a page turner and one simply cannot put down the books?

Reading is one of the most pleasurable things in life. Somehow Dan Brown or John Grisham just seem different on the screen as compared to having the actual book in one's hands.

And that is what I will teach my future children as well - to actually read from a book, and not just from the smartphone or iPad or kindle or Internet. To me, nothing beats having a book in your hands and devouring page after page after page until the end.

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Blondie - The Comic Strip

Lately I have been exploring comics. Graphic novels, comics, manga, they are all the same. I used to read some Japanese comics (translated into Chinese), as well as American comics. My favourites are still Kindaichi (fantastic sleuthing mind), Archie (and his gang), Foxtrot, Dilbert, Cathy to name a few.

Recently I have been reading Blondie. I have known about this comic strip since young when it appeared in the Sunday papers. Through the years, I never fail to read this comic strip. However, about two years back, the strip stopped running in the Sunday papers. Hence I went to do some research and turns out that the comic is still running, and have been running for about eighty years in fact!

The reason I love Blondie is because it is a family strip. The main character Dagwood (Blondie's husband) is a clumsy bumbling employee, forever getting picked on by his boss with no increment through the years, loves eating and napping, and most importantly, loves his wife and kids dearly. His wife is always first in his life, so he refuses to work overtime or go for drinks with his co-workers just to go home and have dinner with his wife and kids.

With such a plot, who can not love the strip? How I wish I can have a Dagwood Bumstead as my husband too - despite the clumsiness, laziness, quirkiness and idiocy, he is one family man who loves his wife dearly. It will be good if my guy can model himself after Dagwood Bumstead!

Bookwork Deluxe : Single Picky Girl

I recently finished this book by a local writer called "Single Picky Girl". She started out working at Singapore Press Holdings, then decided to fly, then quitted flying to go into journalism, then went into Corporate Communications.

Her book is a collection of articles from some of our local newspapers, talking about men, being single, life, love, lust, in general. In a way, she reminds me of my favourite journalist Sumiko Tan, who also used to rave and rant about being single until she finally got hitched recently, and now raving and ranting about married life and getting used to having another person in her house.

When I was reading this book, I came to the realisation that her articles are ordinary. Do not get me wrong, I am not saying she is not a good writer; she is. But her writing is just ordinary. She is not yet in the calibre of Sumiko Tan, nor Colin Goh, nor Adrian Tan even. In fact, I think my writing is just as good, so if she can publish a book, why can I not? I do not think my life experiences are anyway less than hers!

I am not being a green-eyed monster here, but all I am trying to say is that, she gives me hope to want to publish a collection of stories too. If she can use her columns to make into a book, then I daresay my blog has much more material I can use, especially those in my early days when I was still a whiny emotional person where my heart overruled all.

Still, her book makes enjoyable reading. Ordinary, but lifelike. I am sure many can relate to her, in their pursuit of love and life in general.

Bookworm Deluxe : Lessons From 15,000 First Dates

It is finally launched! "15,000 First Dates", Violet's inaugural book! In this book, Violet drew on her six-year experience from Lunch Actually on what men want in a woman in order to date her another time.

There are some chapters that are really useful, like "The Dragon Lady". Nowadays, many women are highfliers, and no doubt, they did not get there by being meek and submissive. However, men do not like women to be equally aggressive on a date.

Personally, I have experienced that. There have been people who feedbacked that I sound serious all the time. I am actually very lucky to be able to find my boyfriend who is not put off by my temper, my aggression and my no-nonsense behaviour. If it is any other men, perhaps no one would be able to tolerate me.

Another chapter which I find true is that of first impressions. Men are visual creatures. Actually not just men, women too. I mean, if we meet up with a tall, handsome muscular man who is full of laughter with crinkly eyes with a good dress sense, we will also tend to favour him over another man who is short, balding, with a pot belly and dresses in a loose T-shirt, bermudas and slippers, right? Men function the same way too, but unlike women, men will not give the chance to know the woman once the initial first impression is spoilt.

Another chapter is on managing expectations. One can always say you expect this and that kind of man, and refuses to budge unless the this and that kind of man appear. But as a woman ages, she never realises that her this and that kind of man will then start looking for younger and better-looking women, leaving her with not many choices left. Hence, sometimes changing expectations is a good thing.

For instance, if I kept insisting and holding on to my criteria, I would never have met someone totally special and wonderful, who is so totally unlike who I was looking for, but who turned out to be the best for me.

There is also a chapter on the kinds of men to look out for. Essentially, we would like to marry men who want to get married too, and not a man who leads us on for years and then in the end do not wish to commit. That chapter will touch on what kind of man constitutes the marrying kind and what kind is the non-marrying kind.

This book is a really informative, insightful and true book that not only educates, but jolts women into reality. I know people will wonder why just women? This book focuses on the kind of women men want, so it helps women prepare for and ace dates, behave and how to get into a relationship and settle down.

Violet will be coming up with a new book for men, so that will be later on! The book is out in Kinokuniya and Times, so do go get it before it is sold out!

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Gender Issues In Literature

I took the day off today, because I have leave to clear, and also because I need to rush assignments (again). There are two assignments, one due today and the other tomorrow. The one today is on the evolution of the English Language in Commonwealth countries, and how these countries adapted their own form of English which carried on through the years.

The one due tomorrow is a comparison and contrast of two plays on the modern women. I really like this module! The texts we are learning are on the emancipation of women and how women discovered themselves and become independent, instead of subjecting themselves to the whims and fancies of men.

The first book, "The Colour Purple", was set in the 1930s United States. It focused on a typical poor black family. The central character is a black girl called Celie. She was raped by her father (whom she later discovered towards the end of the story to be her stepfather), had two children who were taken away from her, and got sent to be married to a man who abused her.

Later on, she met a singer who was her husband's mistress, and from there, learnt how to be independent, that she could talk back to her husband, leave the family, and set up a small business on her own. When she went back a few years later, she became a new woman, confident, independent and opinionated.

This time round, instead of cowering her to submission, her husband actually looked up to her in awe and respected her new independence and opinions. Through this, she also caused her step-daughter-in-law and the other women to stand up for themselves and stop being subjected to the abuse of their men.

The second book is a play called "A Doll's House" by Henrik Ibsen. It was set during Christmas week one year around the late nineteenth century. The central character is Nora, married to a lawyer who would soon be promoted to head the banking department, with two children. On the surface, she seemed like a contented little woman - housewife, sweet to her husband, loves her children, does everything her husband asked, endearing and lovable. But she is smart and capable, although never showed it in front of her husband.

When her husband got into debt once, she borrowed the money from a friend, and then worked by copywriting and needlework to try to pay it all off. She did all these without telling her husband because it was unheard of in those days for a woman to support the family while the man was not.

However, when the friend whom she borrowed money from got fired from his job, he wrote a letter detailing what she did and blackmailed her husband. Her husband confronted her and said she was not worthy of being his wife and mother to his children anymore. Later on, her friend returned the incriminating papers, as he said he did not wish to have a bad conscience.

Then, her husband was happy and said he forgave her. That was when she realised that, as much as her love for her husband was unconditional because she had no qualms doing everything for him, his was not. His love for her was conditional, provided she did not give him trouble, otherwise he would not stand by her and love her. She realised she was just a doll - a plaything to her husband's eyes, someone he could pull on the strings like a puppet.

That was when she decided to leave the family. Her husband pleaded her to stay, but she said their values were so different that only a miracle could make the marriage work already. Hence, she left and apparently, at the end of the play, there was a door slamming, indicating her new-found freedom and independence.

The third book is called "Top Girls" by Caryl Churchill, on working women of the late 1970s to 1980s. In those days, men were still of the idea that women could only be secretaries and whatnot, hence any woman who rose up against the ranks to become the top person in the company would be ostracised by both men and women.

It seemed as if in those days (which were just thirty or so years ago), men would refuse to work under a woman. Any woman being in the workforce would always be overlooked for promotion. The few women who made it tend to make "enemies". It was implied in the book that for a woman to make it, she had to sacrifice relationships, marriage and children and work her life away to go to the top. If she has a family and kids, then chances are she still has to give up her career to take care of her family.

I guess this is still the case now, even though things are getting better. Men and women are given more equal opportunities in the workforce, but how many CEOs do we know that are women? In almost every company I have worked for, the number one is still a man. Does it mean a woman cannot do the job?

I grow up in a family of strong women. I think I have mentioned before, my family has more girls than guys, and the girls are the smarter, more educated and more capable ones, except me. My female cousins mostly have Masters degrees, whereas my male cousins mostly have just a normal degree or honours.

My paternal grandmother was considered educated for her time, because she was able to read and write. Before her accident, she would read the newspaper everyday. She is able to recognise most of the words in the newspaper, even though she only had an equivalent of a Secondary One education level. When she was schooling, she was the only female in her school, and the top scorer. The boys teased her and insulted her, telling her to stay at home and be a girl.

My grandma ran home crying and wanted to quit school. It was her mother and brother who insisted she remained, and her brother even escorted her to and fro school and ensured she was no longer bullied. She could have continued her studies, but her hometown put up a regulation that girls were no longer allowed to go to school, and so, she had to stop.

Later she married my late grandfather and bore him two children. My grandfather was called away to a military school and war came. My grandma single-handedly brought her two children, her mother, her parents-in-law, some relatives and all the children of her relatives out of China and came down to Singapore. She took care of everyone, which is why her relatives, despite now being grandparents, still show her utmost respect.

Her genes passed down to my aunt, who, despite being a housewife, raised five children and took charge of the house so her husband could concentrate on his job. Her five children all went to university. Out of four daughters, one obtained her PhD and two Masters.

My uncle's second daughter, despite being divorced, is a civil servant, raising her two sons, supervises them in her studies, takes care of her parents, comes over to see my grandma, and still have time to meet up with her friends and me occasionally. She has a Masters too.

In contrast, her brother, being the favourite grandchild of my grandmother, had never once came along with her to see my grandma, and the only time he came was one night where he brought his wife over, and they stayed for just an hour or so before leaving.

Now my mother's side. My maternal grandmother is illiterate. She did not have the priviledge of going to school. When my grandfather passed away, leaving a young widow with four children, she brought them up herself single-handedly. All her children went to university.

My mother inherited my grandmother's strong-willed and resilience. She has high standards in everything. She is an ultra perfectionist, a very Type A and Eagle personality, and she has no qualms speaking her mind whenever she sees something not done to perfection.

Growing up with her was very stressful. She was ultra critical of everything I did. Nothing I did ever pleased her. If I did not run into some problems a few years back and she realised how her actions affected me, things would never have improved between us and I will never become who I am now.

My mother is a very strong career-woman. She goes to office early and leaves much later than everyone else everyday. Still, she managed to raise three of us, gave us the best education she could, and taught us whatever she could. Yet she still managed to study for her Masters part-time, takes care of the house, manages our maid and now takes care of both my grandmothers. My father is a typical laid-back lazy man.

So who says a woman cannot have everything? My mother and my older generation are good examples of women during their times. I am not as capable or powerful as my mother, but I hope when the time comes, I, too, can have everything - higher education, career, family. It needs a very supportive and understanding partner to achieve all these.

In this case, men have to be prepared that women are getting more and more capable and powerful, and accept that a powerful women need not mean she does not want a family. Men have to start accepting that women can have all, instead of being turned off by a woman who is capable.

Bookworm Deluxe : Love Is A Verb

I just finished this heartwarming and touching book by Gary Chapman. Heard about him? He is a senior pastor and marriage counsellor in America and the author of "The Five Love Languages".

This book "Love Is A Verb" is a collection of true stories on the different facets of love. Would you love your child if he knows he will be handicapped for life? This mother did and spent all her energy and resources on her handicapped child even though she has two more normal children.

Will you love your child if he had done something awfully wrong and the rest of the family wanted you to disown him? This mother did and her other kids cut off from her but she managed to hold the family together in the end.

Will you love again when your spouse of more than thirty years died of an illness? This woman did three years after the death of her husband, even though she already have three grown children and grandchildren. She married his best friend, who also lost his wife earlier.

Will you love your own adopted children as much as your own children? This woman did, who adopted four more children in addition to her own birth children and love them like how a mother loves her children.

Will you offer a cup of coffee to park rangers when they have to stand in the snow, giving the bad news that the park was closed due to heavy snow? This man did. After turning back to the cafe at the entrance of the park, he bought hot coffee and chocolate for all the park rangers who were freezing out there doing their jobs and they were ever so grateful.

Will you sacrifice what you really want for your loved ones and family? This man did. He sacrificed his well-paying job just to stay home more often to take care of his baby (he loathed changing diapers and were scared of feeding) when his wife was working shifts.

The stories in this book teach us the meaning of humanity, forgiveness, sacrifice, commitment. How many of us are actually committed in a relationship? More often than not, we claim we are committed but actually we start griping when we come across our partners' faults.

But real commitment means examining ourselves, making things better and making the relationship works. For instance, I can wonder why I am with him when he drives me up the wall at times. There were also times when I wanted to just break up and stop creating trouble for myself since men equates trouble.

But then again, when I examine myself, I start to wonder, why is he with me? There is really no justification he will continue being with someone like me, yet he does.

So instead of focusing on each other's flaws, we can focus on how we can make things better.

After all, love is a verb. You make the decision to love and thus should make things work instead of taking the cowardly way out and escaping before anything even started.

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U.S.S.R.

When I was in primary school, the education ministry launched the U.S.S.R. Programme for schools. What, you may ask, is the U.S.S.R. Programme? In those days we knew U.S.S.R. as the Union of Soviet Socialist Republic.

So our education ministry, in a bid to improve our reading scores and encourage students to read and improve their English, incorporated the Uninterrupted Silent Sustained Reading into the curriculum, where students had to spend at least fifteen minutes of pre-assembly time reading a book, and one whole period during the teachers' contact time reading. In my school, those without a book would be warned. Three warnings would warrant a punishment. Hence U.S.S.R.

But judging from the number of people who actually read or are well-versed in books nowadays, somehow I feel this U.S.S.R. Programme is not that successful. I hardly meet people who read, at least not locals. The books in our libraries and bookshops are pretty run-of-the-mill and not that many variety. I guess that cannot be helped because the locals here are only interested in certain genres, hence I hardly ever find some books I really want.

On the other hand, at the eatery where my brother works, it happens to be where the Caucasians stay and visit frequently, so their mini library is filled with books written by Maxine Hong-Kingston, Somerset Maugham, Conn IgGulden to name a few - books which I hardly find in local libraries and bookstores! Imagine a small eatery with just a little shelf can contain much better books than a big bookstore!

Come to think of it, I hardly have time to do real U.S.S.R. ever since I finished school. And that was so long back. Think we should all incorporate U.S.S.R. into our lives so we can make it a point to set aside some time every day to do sone real reading!

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Treasure Cove!

People I have gone out with know never to let me enter a bookstore. Me in a bookstore is like a mouse in a cheese factory. Despite the number of books I have, I still manage to find more books which I want!

Last night we were supposed to watch the movie "Nine". Before the show started, we started browsing around the mall. Then I saw Harris and decided to go in. Before one knew it, I already picked out so many books I liked!

Thanks to my darling, I now have more books for my reading pleasure! Especially the treasures I found yesterday, which I have been looking high and low for!

See? The complete volume of Julia Child's Mastering The Art of French Cooking, as shown in the movie "Julie and Julia"

The almost entire Tudor series of Philippa Gregory, which includes
The Constant Princess, The Other Boleyn Girl, The Boleyn Inheritance,
The Queen's Fool, The Virgin's Lover and The Other Queen.

Now if only there is The Wise Woman, the collection will be complete!

Love Letters of Great Men and Women -
the one featured in Sex And The City

Actually, the one read by Carrie Bradshaw was just on "Love Letters Of Great Men", but this includes those by women too. I am always one for writing letters, I find writing letters so romantic and keeps the sparks alive in a relationship! Unfortunately, the few guys I have been with (except for one) find writing letters unnecessary and time-consuming! My current guy is also not a strong advocate in writing letters too! :-(

Looks like my resolve to reading more this year is going to come true!

Ib And Christine : A Fairytale

This is a title from one of Anderson's tales, incidentally my favourite one. I have always loved Andsrson's fairy tales, Grimms fairy tales, and Aesop's Fables. Which makes me wonder, why does no one write stories like that anymore?

Anyway Ib and Christine is one of his lesser known stories. In fact, I only came across it once, by sheer luck. All the Anderson's tales I have, all contain the more well-known stories, but not this. Yet this is the story that stuck in my mind until now. I remember crying when I first read the story.

Recently I added an application called "Stories of Hans Christian Anderson". In the description, it was stated as his complete collection. So I scrolled through the contents and managed to find the story!

I started reading again. The story is about two young kids - a farmer's boy called Ib and a fisherman's girl called Christine. They are best friends.

One day they got lost in a forest and could not get out. On the way they met a gypsy woman who seemed to appear out of nowhere. She gave them three nuts and told them those were wishing nuts.

Christine asked if she could wish for a golden carriage with lots of horses. The gypsy woman said yes, so Ib gave her the nut.

Christine then asked if she could wish for many pretty dresses and the gypsy woman said yes. So Ib gave her the nut too.

Finally it came to the last nut which Christine told Ib to keep. The gypsy woman then said that would be the best nut as the best things would come from there.

Then the gypsy woman showed them the way out of the woods. Ib went home and opened his nut but there was nothing inside but black earth.

Years passed. Ib took over the farm while Christine went to the city and became a housekeeper to a rich household. On one of her visits back, Ib asked her to marry him. She agreed and he said he would marry her once he saved up enough.

Few months later, Ib received a letter from Christine, saying the young master of the house had come back and taken in with her. He would like to marry her and his parents had given their blessings. However she hesitated as she was still keeping her promise to wait for Ib.

Ib knew Christine would not have a good life with him, hence he wrote back and gave his blessings. Thus, Christine's dream of a big carriage with many horses and pretty dresses had come true.

More years passed. One day, while farming as usual, Ib struck a piece of stone in the earth. He went to the local clergy who told him it was worth a fortune and advised him to go to the city to change the stone to cash.

So Ib left for the city and the stone was indeed worth a fortune. He was now a rich man. While wondering about in the city, he saw a little girl who looked a lot like Christine. He followed her home to one of the poorest districts, where the girl's mother lied, sick and dying.

Ib recognized the lady as Christine. Apparently her husband had gone bankrupt, and unable to pay his debts, he had killed himself. Christine herself got ill and as she was dying, she wanted Ib to take care of her daughter, also called Christine.

Ib was not sure if Christine recognized him, but he promised to look after the little girl. He brought the little girl back to the farm and became both a father and mother to her.

So for Ib, the best things in life indeed came from the dark earth - he found treasure, and his Christine had come back to him.

As I finished reading the story again, tears welled up in my eyes again. I remember reading this story as a little girl, and cried. Now, halfway through my life, I still cry after reading this.

I think everyone wants to believe in true love and fairy tales. While this is not a conventional fairy tale like boy meets girl, falls in love, marry, and live happily ever after, yet this story is just so much more real and pure.

Afterall, do we girls not hope for someone, not a prince charming who sweeps us off our feet, but a simple man who loves us so much that he can let us go for a better life? And give us the best things in life while he is satisfied with something small? And adopt our children when we die?

If this is not pure true love, then what is it? And that is why I love it, and still get touched by the love and selflessness shown by the hero.

I am so glad I found this story again, and can keep reading and reading from now on!

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Bookwork Deluxe : Le Cordon Bleu At Home

I have not done a book review for quite some time. I have said I would like to catch up on my reading, so in order to really get it done, I may be doing more book reviews henceforth. Anyway, this is not exactly a normal story book, but a cookbook, and my first attempt actually reviewing a cookbook.

I have been trying to whip up a full meal for ages, instead of various dishes here and there. So I referred to the cookbook of all cookbooks - Le Cordon Bleu At Home, written by the chefs and trainers of Le Cordon Bleu Paris itself and published by them too.

The book is divided into three sections - Beginners, Intermediate and Advanced. Every section has about a hundred recipes or so, and every receipe is a full meal, starting from the appetizer to the main course, ending with dessert. For instance, there is a Peach Mixed Fruit Salad, Duck Confit and Poached Pear in one recipe.

As expected, the famous Beouf Bugignon is under the Intermediate section. Although the beginners section looks to be a bit too advanced for me too! The prologue to the book includes kitchen skills, the different utensils, the different measurements, and every section also touches on how to bone poultry and how to remove all the innards of a fish.

In short, this is a chef's bible. If there is a cookbook you must have on fine dining, this should be the book. Afterall, every recipe lets you whip up a full meal, what can be better than that?

Bookworm Deluxe : The 69 Love Notes - Secrets To A Loving And Lasting Relationship

I have not done any book reviews for some time now. Since I have recently made it a point to catch up on all the reading and re-reading, I thought it would be a good idea to chart my progress by reviewing books each time I finish reading one. At least that will keep me going and fulfil my goal!

I thought it would be appropriate to start with a book written by a local author, who also carves a career coaching lovelorn people. Due to my recent change in status, I thought this book would be useful, or serves as a reminder of what to do and what not to do.

I bought this book solely to read the tips on making a relationship work and last. Besides, the author herself is pretty insightful and passionate about what she is doing. She is a beautiful person in her own right, both externally and internally. Her husband is a very lucky man!

In the book, the author gave sixty-nine tips on how to have a loving and lasting relationship. To be honest, the tips are not new to me. In fact, ever since I entered into my very first relationship, I already knew about those tips. The author simply put them into words and described them thoroughly.

Hence, after my own experiences, I can affirm that those tips are really what makes a relationship last. I have known them long ago, but perhaps due to youth, emotions and temper, I often let my emotional outbursts affect what I wanted to communicate, hence the relationship(s) started breaking down.

But after being single for some time, being more in control of my emotions and maturing (I hope), I swear by these tips. In fact, I used to do most of what is mentioned in the book (except the guys were either unreceptive or deemed me unreasonable and picky), and I still do them.

I bought this book, thinking I used to be unreasonable, thinking I did not do a good job the last time round, so I wanted to read the tips and ensure I do a good job this time round. Guess what? I was not unreasonable at all! Nor was I asking too much! Whatever written in the book is actually the very basics to maintain a relationship!

So I am really happy that I did know what to do after all, just perhaps the guys did not know and I did not really communicate well enough? Or that I was just doing things one-sided without much contribution from the guys? Afterall, for a relationship to really work and last, it takes two hands to clap.

So kudos to Kloudiia for her very insightful and entertaining book, with real-life examples and tips that every single looking for love, every couple in love and every married couple can use and benefit from. Hence, I will highly recommend this book to everyone!

Cryptography ....

I just finished reading Dan Brown’s “Digital Fortress” for the second time. I remember the first time I read that, I was so engrossed and captivated that I could hardly put the book down and finished it within a couple of hours! Now that I read it again, I am still so captivated and engrossed by the story!

I am never a figures person, so it takes a long time for me to crack any code to do with numbers. If it is anagrams, word search or crossword, I can get that done in a short time, but for Sudoku, I am still unable to get all right. Hence, I will fail miserably at algorithms in cryptography. Still, Cryptography itself is an interesting subject.

Imagine if you want to communicate only to your loved one. Why not try a code within a code, something which only both of you can understand? Or if you want to bring your message across to an ally but do not wish to let it fall in enemies’ hands, you can try to weave a help signal into a code so only your ally can decode it? Imagine if I am to tell a story in code, now how interesting will that be? No one can ever decipher what I say, save for those who are ultra smart or who venture a very lucky guess. I can even write my name in code and no one will know my full name!

Because I enjoy mind games (as in quizzes, logical puzzles, code breaking, not playing of people’s emotions), sometimes I do have my own code game. For instance, I will have my phone number in code. So whichever guy who wishes to know my number have to break the code. I started doing this when I just got to know people, and not sure if they are sincere or dubious. So when they asked me for my number, I would tell them in code. Those who were able to break the code would be those I believe to be more intelligent, thus I gave them a chance. Those who could not or could not be bothered to, I left those behind.

To me, if the guy is really sincere in getting my number, he would crack it just to contact me. Besides I find that refreshing and intriguing if someone does that to me. So far about eighty percent of those I have “quizzed” were able to get it right at the first or second try the most. Maybe my code is too easy to break! In that case, the other twenty percent really need to be spoon fed, so just as well I stopped all contact!

How I wish I can think up a real code that no one except myself will be able to break! Perhaps in the future when I draw up a will to split whatever little assets I have, I will play a game with my beneficiaries. I will use a code in a riddle and they will have to go on a treasure hunt to find the missing will. The first person to find it will be entitled to be the administrator. How fun that will be! ;-p

Bookworm Deluxe : The Best I Could

I just finished reading this book by a prominent criminal lawyer. Pretty inspiring, and a different angle to the case(s) than what was reported in the papers. Having always been interested in criminal law and justice, I bought this book the moment it came out in the stores.

The book highlights his life, his childhood, how he stumbled into law and into criminal law, his first case, his health, his more prominent cases, his university years and the important people he met and rubbed shoulders with.

I have wondered about the man behind the cases. I have wondered why he would want to take on "hopeless" cases. Why must he defend those who obviously committed the crime, in the hope of getting them off scot free? Is it because of money?

Then when I read the book, at least according to him, most of the cases the client's families have no money to pay his full fees. So either he told them to go to the State to request for his services, in which case the State will pay him, or else reduce his fees. Hmmm....

Then as I read on, I realise that as a lawyer, and a criminal defence lawyer, his is not to question whether the client is guilty or not. He just wants the client to tell the truth to him and in court. Cases where the clients are obviously guilty, he will encourage them to plead guilty. He just tries his best and then leave it to the judge to hand out the final verdict.

I must say, after reading the book, our local justice system is fair and unbiased indeed! Which is why criminals seldom get away, and we have the highest number of executions per capita, for countries that still practice the death penalty.

Judging from some of his defences, he is really brilliant! I guess he does not become who and what he is by screwing up cases and making a mess in court! If I were to become a Deputy Public Prosecutor as initially thought, I would have the chance of meeting him in court, and perhaps get my evidence shredded and thrown out!

Bookworm Deluxe : Mars And Venus On A Date

Finally, I have finished reading this John Gray’s book, where he was talking about the five stages of dating and relationship development – Attraction, Uncertainty, Exclusivity, Intimacy, Engagement. All five stages have to be passed before the relationship can stand the test of time.

There are some important facts in the book, like how soul mates can only be determined through time and patience, and by going through the five stages, and how when the time is right, the relationship will just fall into place. In other words, it is wise to take things slow instead of rushing in.

The book mentions that most people make the mistake of jumping in too quickly, like from Stage One (Attraction) to Stage Three (Exclusivity), or worse, Stage One to Stage Four (Intimacy). The second stage (Uncertainty) is actually common and normal.

If a woman means a lot to a man, but he is unsure whether she is the one, he will often withdraw and get distant. Anyway, in his other book, men all need their own space to sort out their feelings. So by giving the man space and time to reflect, he will finally sort out his feelings and go to the next stage. In other words, be patient and wait!

However women function differently. When the dating couple have reached Stage Two (Uncertainty), the woman often panics and wonder why the man is no longer that interested in her. So she makes the mistake of starting to pursue him instead. The book says that is not recommended, as once a woman starts being more interested, the man will lose interest. Yet when the woman calls it quits and stops pursuing, the man suddenly becomes interested in her again.

Hmmm… now I know where my problem lies. In any case, it is quite true. Sometimes after the end of a relationship, the guy came back and asked to start over, but by then I had already moved on. So in Stages One and Two, sexist as that may sound, it is recommended to let the man do the pursuing.

John Gray’s analogy is that men like to please women, so it gives them no greater pleasure than to know that their date had a great time. He says if a man asks more from a woman instead of pleasing them, then they are not emotionally ready for a relationship. For instance, if he wants more intimacy than she can and is willing to offer, and he does not respect it if she says no, then he should not be looking for a solid relationship as he is clearly not prepared to be in one. Quite true actually. Only mature men are willing to go out and treat a woman well, and not the self-centredness of immature guys.

And when he withdraws, just leave him alone, with the occasional contact to find out how he is doing, or ask his advise, and spend the time with family and other friends. Women should not make the mistake of pursuing a man more than he is willing to give, as that is one sure way to kill off whatever interest he had in her!

After he has finally sorted out his feelings, he will then move on to the third stage (Exclusivity). Only at the third stage (Exclusivity), then the couple really becomes a couple. Both are committed to each other, both do things to please each other. And so on and so forth. A normal healthy relationship is only built up through time and after going through all the stages.

At the fourth stage (Intimacy), it is when the couple really knows each other, ie the bad points, the mood swings, the emotions. After all, in a relationship, one has to take the good and the bad. Only by knowing each other thoroughly can they finally move on to the last stage (Engagement).

John Gray brought up the point of soul mates. He said soul mates are not to be found instantaneously. In most cases, the couple has to go through all stages before they can determine if they are soul mates. Soul mates normally occur around the fourth stage, as only when your soul wants to be with the person, then you can talk of marriage.

His definition of a “soul” is something that is the inner core of one’s being. From infancy to adulthood, things like physical appearance, emotions, maturity, will change. However, one’s soul will always be the same, no matter how old one is. The soul is the sub-conscience, the intuition. Thus, if your soul does not feel right, then it is not right. Only when your soul feels right then it is right. So for two persons to become soul mates, both their souls have to be able to connect.

According to him, there are four kinds of chemistry – physical, mental, emotional, spiritual. Physical chemistry is simply desire and attraction. Emotional chemistry is the affection both feel for each other. Mental chemistry creates interest. Spiritual chemistry creates love. A soul mate includes all four.

In most relationships, both have physical and emotional chemistry. Some may even have mental chemistry. However, most will not have a spiritual chemistry. So the affection and interest can only take it so far, and after a while, cracks will appear. But only when we find someone that encompasses all four then everything will fall into place and we can think of spending our lives with that person.

At times, both can love each other very much (Stage Four). But that does not mean both have to marry each other, because during Stage Four, if they find that they have lots of disagreements or find each other unsuitable in any way, they just cannot progress to marriage. In other words, soul mates bring out the best in each other, and not the worst. If both bring out the worst in each other (like quarrels and arguments over trifle and petty issues), then they are not soul mates, and even if they love each other, they should not bring themselves to get married.

I can so relate to that! I believe all those who have been in relationships before that did not work out can relate to that too. I used to think why if we loved each other, he just did not want to marry me in the end? He once said that he did not feel I was his soul mate, and I was wondering why did he only realize it then?

But through the years, and other broken relationships later and after reading the book, I can totally relate to it now. Essentially, if we were quarrelling over every little thing, then how could we even sustain a solid relationship, let alone a marriage? It is not so easy like what was shown in movies – they met, they fell in love, they got married. In real life, that is often not the case. You may love someone very much, but if the person is not someone you can foresee being with, then it is no point dragging on.

The book also mentions that people approach relationships very differently. There are some who are very lucky, they met, they fell in love, and the first person they dated became their soul mate. There are some who have to date a few, several, many, people before actually finding their soul mate. And there are some who may never find their soul mate for some reason.

He also says that soul mates often are not sought out; they just appear unexpectedly. And they are not perfect. They are normal humans just like us; they have their moods, their down periods, their tempers. And they may not be the best people; just that they are the best for us. But most people go for perfection, so if they feel someone is better, they just pull out. Which is a pity, because the person may just be dating his / her soul mate but miss the chance just because he may find someone “better”.

The book also mentions emotional maturity. The more people a person dates, the more one knows what one wants, the more emotionally stable one gets. After a while, the soul mate will just appear once the person gets it all together. Important thing is to approach with an open heart and mind. The more open we are, the closer we can come to finding the “right” person, as well as knowing who is “wrong” for us. And the more mistakes we make, the closer we will be able to look for who is suitable.

That is why there are cases where after dating a few people, one realizes that the soul mate is actually someone from the past. For instance, during that time, they might love each other very much but did not feel it right to get married. So they split up and started dating others. After a few experiences and becoming more emotionally mature, they realized they were the ones for each other all along, and thus got back together. When this happened, they would then be able to go by the five stages very quickly and end up with each other.

Thus, it really depends on when the time is right. After all, true love has to withstand the test of time. It is only by going through trials that the love can survive. Perhaps destiny plays a part too? If you belong to each other, no matter how much uncertainty or separation, both will still end up together.

Rediscovering The Food For The Mind

Finally, I have an idea how to sort out my books! Since I am going to re-read them again anyway, which is probably going to take me the next couple of years in light of the number I have and my kind of schedule lately, I have decided to read them according to category.

Which means I will start with classic English Literature to modern English Literature. That means, "Canterbury Tales", followed by "Utopia", then Shakespeare, "Paradise Lost", Jane Austen, "Frankenstein", "Jane Eyre", "Wuthering Heights", Charles Dickens, George Eliot, Oscar Wilde, D H Lawrence, Sherlock Holmes, Agatha Christie, James Joyce, George Orwell, Lewis Caroll, Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Dan Brown, Nicholas Sparks.

Next, comes French Literature of Antoine de Saint-Exupery, Guy de Maupassant and Gustave Flaubert. Then Russian Literature of Fyodor Dostoyevsky ("Crime and Punishement", "Poor Folk", "The Idiot"), together with the works of Leo Tolstoy ("War and Peace"), as well as "Doctor Zhivago" and "Lara's Child".

Not to mention American authors like Margaret Mitchell ("Gone With The Wind") and the sequel "Scarlett", as well as F Scott Fitzgerald and the historian writer Margaret George. And also the Coloumbian author Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Plus the modern books like "The Kite Runner", "The Inheritance of Loss", "The Time Traveller's Wife".

After that Chinese Literature (in English of course). The four great novels - "Journey to the West", "A Dream of Red Mansions", "The Water Margin" and "Romance of the Three Kingdoms", followed by the "Selected Stories of Lu Hsun". Also books by Chinese writers like Amy Tan, Lisa See, Jung Chang, and our local writers like Catherine Lim. Finally, it will be Chinese books of Eileen Chang, Louis Cha and the Wisely series. Plus the various manga series which I have.

This is not even a comprehensive list! There are still lots more books which are standalone that I have not noted down. Looks like I am going to have a great time rediscovering the beauty of books for quite a while!

Stock Clearance ....

Finally! I managed to finish my one thousand two hundred word paper on the architecture and compelling pull of the Roman Colosseum, as well as a two thousand word paper on the extent of how social and cultural factors affect the use of English in everyday life. Although I think I may not be able to score very well. Now I only have a thousand-word report to finish by Wednesday then I can breathe a sigh of relief (until the next deadline in another month's time).

It had been a fruitful weekend indeed. Besides rushing assignments, I bought a few more books (twenty more in fact), cleared my stock of books and met up with a very nice and interesting person. One can really learn so much once one widens one's horizons and meet up with different kinds of people, of all backgrounds, qualifications and walks of life.

I realise the reason why I have so many books is because I have a few versions and editions of the same book. To date, I have three editions of "Great Expectations", four editions of "Pride and Prejudice", two editions of "The Kite Runner", "The Inheritance of Loss", "Life of Pi" and "War and Peace", three editions of "The Little Prince" and "The Diary of Anne Frank", and of course, five editions of "The Complete Works of William Shakespeare". Not to mention a few different editions of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass", "Complete Brothers' Grimm" and "Complete Hans Christian Anderson".

Many of my books have yellowed with age. Ever since I started buying and keeping books, I have never gotten rid of any, except those which my brothers used to tear when they were young, and for that I always cried whenever I see any of my books being torn apart. Books to me are a precious commodity, something which I can keep and last for life, and having different editions just make for a good collection.

But due to lack of space, at times one just have to be practical. So I did something which I have never done before - I gave away almost everything that have repeated titles. Thus, now I only have one "Pride and Prejudice", "Great Expectations", "The Kite Runner", "The Inheritance of Loss", "Life of Pi", "Alice in Wonderland" and "War and Peace".

As for the rest, I am never giving away any of the Shakespeare books, "The Little Prince" or folk tales, as the different editions have different illustrations. Some have the original coloured artwork which are just too precious to give away.

I initially thought of bringing them to sell at a second-hand bookstore, or donating them to an orphanage or children's home, until my maid requested if she could have them. She is going back home in May, and would like to bring the books back home as it has been hard for her family members to get hold of any decent storybook.

I am more than willing to oblige of course! She told me her family members and herself love reading and studying, but due to circumstances, they were not able to do more of those. No wonder she always helps herself to our books, and I always see her reading in her room after dinner or when she is on her break.

Yes, books are a rare priviledge in certain countries and places. Our local students really do not know how lucky they are that books and resources are so easily available everywhere here. Yet for some reason, they just hate reading and learning. We should take a leaf out of people from less priviledged places, in their thirst of reading and learning!

Books Galore!

I was doing a bit of stock taking at home, and I realise that I need another bookshelf! Yes, I have more books than clothes! My brothers have more CDs than clothes, but for me, I listen to the radio mostly.

Class 95 and Gold 90.5 have most of my favourite songs, so I have no need to buy that many CDs. Besides the kind of songs I like, I can hardly find the CD compilations. No point buying a whole CD just for one or two songs, so I rather burn songs I like and then compile into a CD myself. (Oops, did I just confess that?! :-p)

So anyway, I have enough books to set up a store. We have a big bookshelf along our second floor hallway, where my parents store all their books, with only a little corner for mine. So my books started spilling into the study, where my brothers store their books that spilled out from their room.

Now, my books have spilled out from the study to my room. My bookshelf is already full and my books are now everywhere, on my desk, floor, even stacked on top of my (unused) electone! Some have already spilled into the attic! Which is why I need another bookshelf, and a bigger one at that!

Come to think of it, among all my friends (excluding my second ex as he is another avid reader with a voracious appetite for books), my house is the only one that actually has a bookshelf in every room, and a big one in the hallway. That shows just how much my entire family likes to read.

And the bookshelves we have actually contain fiction and non-fiction books, as well as magazines, whereas for most of my friends, the only bookshelf they have is in their room, and even then, they got it because they need to store their school books. The rest of the bookshelf are used to store toys and other trinkets, instead of books. Which is why for those who have come to my place, they always get astounded by the number of books we have.

My mum has been nagging me to clean up or give away all my books. But I am not selling away any of them! My parents are always so bewildered why I buy books instead of borrowing from the library. I do go to the library to borrow, but if it is a book I really like, I will buy it after returning it.

The reason I buy books is because I can read and re-read it again and again, whenever my mood fancies. Books feed my mind, one is so much more enriched after reading a real touching story or a captivating book.

There are so many lessons one can derived from books, from language to grammar to vocabulary to poetry to history to philosophy to human nature to psychology to relationships to medicine to science and technology to law to astrology to religion to food to travel to music to dance.

In fact, everything that can be found in this universe can be learnt from books. Which is why I am so grateful my parents started me reading at a young age, as I think I will go around in life missing out on a lot if I do not read.

Now what I need to do is to list down all the books I have, and start re-reading them again. Sometimes one gets a different opinion when one reads a book again, at a different age and stage. Perhaps I may be able to understand the story better the next time round, perhaps I can grasp the message which I failed to grasp. And that is why my passion for reading will never fizzle!