For the past year or so, I have had friends tying the knot. One dated for just two months and got married. One dated for three months. One dated for eight months.
On the other hand, I have seen people breaking up after dating for seven or eight years. I myself was ever in a relationship for six years and all came to nought too.
This makes me wonder, when is it a good or perfect time to get hitched? How long should a couple date? There have been people saying once we reach a certain age, we do not need long courtships. We can just settle down a short while after getting together.
On the other hand, there are people who insist the couple must date for two years, no matter what age. Some even say four years.
I always feel it really depends on age. When one is in the early to mid, or even late twenties, perhaps two or four years is no big deal. But after a certain age, say thirty-five, can they still afford a two or four year courtship?
It may not matter to men but it matters a lot to women, especially if she intends to have children. Once a woman reaches thirty, she just wants to settle down and perhaps have kids before thirty-five. Dragging on further will cause her to have a higher risk of an abnormal child, not to mention being harder to conceive.
There are also many men who want to father kids before they get too old. Who want to be retired before their children even reach secondary school?
Hence does it matter how long one dates? One can settle down when one feels ready. Which brings me to the next question : when is one ever "ready"?
Is the one who married after three months less ready than the one who dated for eight years and still not intending to get hitched?
I have seen those who are super ready. They got hitched with the first person they met. I have also seen those who are perpetually not ready. They can have strings of girlfriends or boyfriends but can never go to a deeper level of commitment. Or can date someone for ages but never think of progressing.
So when is it a perfect or good time to get hitched? Is it one month, one year, one decade after one starts dating, or is it never ever?
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
On the other hand, I have seen people breaking up after dating for seven or eight years. I myself was ever in a relationship for six years and all came to nought too.
This makes me wonder, when is it a good or perfect time to get hitched? How long should a couple date? There have been people saying once we reach a certain age, we do not need long courtships. We can just settle down a short while after getting together.
On the other hand, there are people who insist the couple must date for two years, no matter what age. Some even say four years.
I always feel it really depends on age. When one is in the early to mid, or even late twenties, perhaps two or four years is no big deal. But after a certain age, say thirty-five, can they still afford a two or four year courtship?
It may not matter to men but it matters a lot to women, especially if she intends to have children. Once a woman reaches thirty, she just wants to settle down and perhaps have kids before thirty-five. Dragging on further will cause her to have a higher risk of an abnormal child, not to mention being harder to conceive.
There are also many men who want to father kids before they get too old. Who want to be retired before their children even reach secondary school?
Hence does it matter how long one dates? One can settle down when one feels ready. Which brings me to the next question : when is one ever "ready"?
Is the one who married after three months less ready than the one who dated for eight years and still not intending to get hitched?
I have seen those who are super ready. They got hitched with the first person they met. I have also seen those who are perpetually not ready. They can have strings of girlfriends or boyfriends but can never go to a deeper level of commitment. Or can date someone for ages but never think of progressing.
So when is it a perfect or good time to get hitched? Is it one month, one year, one decade after one starts dating, or is it never ever?
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
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