The Path To True Love Never Did Run Smooth

There is an adage that says "The path to true love never did run smooth". Very true! Perhaps because men and women are structured differently. Perhaps being born a female, we spend our lives suffering for what we want, for who we love.

Women are more emotional beings, especially someone like me. When I fall in love, I really really fall deep. Men are more practical. They can take things easy and move on, which sometimes make women wonder just how deep is their love if they can let go so easily just like that.

My dad told me that women want love, whereas men only want sex. My parents feel that he is too nice to me, that by being so nice to me, he is only trying to get me in bed with him. But the thing is, if you truly love someone, will you not be nice to him / her and treat him / her well? So if I treat my guy very well, does that mean I want to bed him?

My mum says that if the guy is really serious with me, he will comment on me and make me a better person. He comments on me too. He did tell me that he does not like me wearing mini skirts, or that to stop assiociating with guys whom he view as sex maniacs.

So what does my mum want? Someone who puts me down, insults me and criticises me all the time? Someone like my first ex? Or someone like my second ex who throws his temper around and tries to control what I do? I always feel that if one really loves someone, he / she should take the partner as a whole.

Which is why I am so appreciative of him, because he really accepts me for who and what I am. And it is so hard for me to find someone who really takes me for what I am, because goodness knows I have put a lot of people off with my weirdness and whining.

The thing is, everytime I hook up with someone, they have things to say. My mum would say that this guy is this, and that guy is that, and whatnot. It is like no one is ever good enough for me. But can she not see that it is my choice, not hers?

She found the most fault with my current guy. The reason we are still together is because we have promised each other not to let go, but he was really pissed off with my parents' attitude. My mum did not have much in contact with him, but my aunt spoke to him that day when he visited me in the hospital after my surgery, and according to her, he did not seem sincere enough.

Then my dad spoke to him a few days back. And my dad sort of tested him, saying that if he cannot commit to me now, why not just leave me? According to my guy, my dad's attitude was really threatening, so to prevent trouble, he said he would leave me.

I do not know the exact situation of the exchange, but when I came back last night, my dad told me to stop seeing him, as he said the guy is not committed at all, that if he really loves me, he would not agree to leave me so readily. I was too bewildered and upset to do anything.

I was so upset that I sent out some random messages, which incidentally incurred the wrath of someone for showing inconsideration. My sincerest apologies if I disturbed you from your sleep, and sorry if I got too carried away by my emotions.

My mum told me if he is willing to show his commitment to me, she will let us be together wholeheartedly without any complaints. Why must he say to wait a few years before deciding whether to be with me? But then we have only been together for half a year the most, is it not too fast to commit?

My parents as much as said they forbid me from seeing him. My dad even said he would take action if we still continue seeing each other. But I am already an adult. Legally, I am no longer under their control. So even if I choose to love him and be so devoted, even if I suffer for love, that is my choice. They cannot just ground me or take me to court for defying them.

My mum said the reason she feels he is not committed is because I continue to see him. Since he has me with him, there is no necessity for him to make a commitment. She told me to stop seeing him until he makes a commitment. If he truly loves me like he and I both claim, he will quickly make up his mind and come back to me.

But I thought precisely because I am with him, that is why he can be committed. Perhaps he just needs time. Guys are like that, they take time to commit. If I break things off, then why would he still need to be committed to me?

She said she does not understand my logic. In her opinion, if I give the guy what he wants, he will take advantage, whereas if the guy loses me, if I really mean a lot to him, he will start to panic.

My guy did a lot of things for me. When I told him about the trip and what I needed, he helped me look immediately. When I wanted to watch a certain television series, he went to find and bought for me. I have never had someone who treated me so well before. He protected me every way he could, well... almost at least. If this is not commitment, if this is not sincerity, then I do not know what it is.

I told my parents all these, yet they told me how would I know he is not treating me well so he could cheat me? Oh please, do they have to doubt everything? He took the special effort to meet my parents even though he knows they are very difficult people, and got himself scolded, insulted and whatnot. Which guy would be able to stand it?

Now even he says he does not feel like meeting them anymore, as he wants to avoid confrontation. My exs all told me they could not stand my parents, and sometimes being with me was very stressful since my parents always insist on what they want.

But no more. This time I am not giving in withoout a fight. Juliet is not going to die with her Romeo, she is going to stand up to her parents. Ophelia is not going to give up Hamlet so easily. Celia is going to get her Orlando this time, at all costs.