My best friend really knows me! But then, we have not maintained a close friendship for twelve years for nothing. She is the one that knows what I am thinking, how I feel and the reasons I do certain things. If no one else understands the way I function, she is one who does.
We were chatting on the phone last night as a way of catching up. She told me that my ex would be holding his church and dinner ceremony in July, and asked if I would be going this time. So I asked if he asked her to ask me, and she said no. She just wondered because I kept changing my mind over attending his solemnisation last year.
I asked if she would be going, and she said if she is free that day, of course she will go. My reply to that is, if I am free that day, I will go too. She then asked if I would feel awkward, because after all, I did not attend his solemnisation was because I was not able to bring myself to witness it.
My reply to that? Honestly, of course I would feel weird. Who would not? She also felt a bit uncomfortable attending her ex's wedding two years back. But it is his choice after all. If he thinks he is much happier with her, then so be it. If he still takes me as a friend, then the least I can do is to be happy for him.
My best friend then told me that it has been so long, and now that he is married, I too should just move on and settle down myself. She can really read my mind! It is not that I have not moved on (well, perhaps a very minor teeny weeny tinge still cannot really let go completely), but the reason I am still not married is not because of him. It is because no one has proposed to me.
Perhaps no one loves me enough, or deems me worthy enough to want to be committed? Or else say will sure commit, but makes me wait. Wait for how long, I wonder? Until I am in my thirties, forties, until I am old and grey? If the guy is really committed in the first place, why wait?
I am not talking about if we were still students, then of course have to wait. I am talking about guys who already have established their careers, abundant savings and in a relationship for a few years. Why still wait? Guys are different, they can wait, even until middle or old age. A woman, once past thirty, her market value goes downhill, especially if she wants to have kids and raise a family while she is still young.
My best friend also told me that her boyfriend's mother may want to give away his dog. She asked if I am willing to take the dog. She said that if they are going to give away the dog, they rather give to someone who will love and take care of the dog. Again, she knows me so well!
However, my mum only allows one dog in the house. She said if it is my own house, she does not care even if I run an animal farm, but in her house, she allows only one dog. So too bad, even if I want the dog so much, I have to respect the rest of my family members too. Same goes for my best friend. Even though she loves the dog to bits, she has to respect her family members as well, since her mum is allergic to pets, and her grandmother is scared of dogs.
Which is why the SPCA also always advises the public not to keep a pet on an impulse. Decisions should be made by every member of the family, because as long as one family member is not warm to the idea, problems like this will suffice. I only wish the dog can be re-homed to somewhere good. The SPCA should only be the last resort after all efforts of re-homing have been in vain.
We were chatting on the phone last night as a way of catching up. She told me that my ex would be holding his church and dinner ceremony in July, and asked if I would be going this time. So I asked if he asked her to ask me, and she said no. She just wondered because I kept changing my mind over attending his solemnisation last year.
I asked if she would be going, and she said if she is free that day, of course she will go. My reply to that is, if I am free that day, I will go too. She then asked if I would feel awkward, because after all, I did not attend his solemnisation was because I was not able to bring myself to witness it.
My reply to that? Honestly, of course I would feel weird. Who would not? She also felt a bit uncomfortable attending her ex's wedding two years back. But it is his choice after all. If he thinks he is much happier with her, then so be it. If he still takes me as a friend, then the least I can do is to be happy for him.
My best friend then told me that it has been so long, and now that he is married, I too should just move on and settle down myself. She can really read my mind! It is not that I have not moved on (well, perhaps a very minor teeny weeny tinge still cannot really let go completely), but the reason I am still not married is not because of him. It is because no one has proposed to me.
Perhaps no one loves me enough, or deems me worthy enough to want to be committed? Or else say will sure commit, but makes me wait. Wait for how long, I wonder? Until I am in my thirties, forties, until I am old and grey? If the guy is really committed in the first place, why wait?
I am not talking about if we were still students, then of course have to wait. I am talking about guys who already have established their careers, abundant savings and in a relationship for a few years. Why still wait? Guys are different, they can wait, even until middle or old age. A woman, once past thirty, her market value goes downhill, especially if she wants to have kids and raise a family while she is still young.
My best friend also told me that her boyfriend's mother may want to give away his dog. She asked if I am willing to take the dog. She said that if they are going to give away the dog, they rather give to someone who will love and take care of the dog. Again, she knows me so well!
However, my mum only allows one dog in the house. She said if it is my own house, she does not care even if I run an animal farm, but in her house, she allows only one dog. So too bad, even if I want the dog so much, I have to respect the rest of my family members too. Same goes for my best friend. Even though she loves the dog to bits, she has to respect her family members as well, since her mum is allergic to pets, and her grandmother is scared of dogs.
I asked her if the parents want to give away his dog, why keep it in the first place? She said he got it because he wanted the dog, and just adopted it without telling anyone in the family until the day he brought the dog home. But I feel (and she agrees) that anything to do with a life should be discussed fully with all the members of the family.
Everyone must agree, take turns in taking care, treat like a family member, and not just take and then chuck aside after a few years. It is so traumatic for the animal in question. Worst thing is to keep a pet, then realise there is no time to take care, and just dump it at SPCA like that.
Everyone must agree, take turns in taking care, treat like a family member, and not just take and then chuck aside after a few years. It is so traumatic for the animal in question. Worst thing is to keep a pet, then realise there is no time to take care, and just dump it at SPCA like that.
Which is why the SPCA also always advises the public not to keep a pet on an impulse. Decisions should be made by every member of the family, because as long as one family member is not warm to the idea, problems like this will suffice. I only wish the dog can be re-homed to somewhere good. The SPCA should only be the last resort after all efforts of re-homing have been in vain.
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