2am and the rain is falling
Here we are at the crossroads once again
You're telling me you're so confused
You can't make up your mind
Is this meant to be
You're asking me
But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But i believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do
In your arms as the dawn is breaking
Face to face and a thousand miles apart
I've tried my best to make you see
There's hope beyond the pain
If we give enough
If we learn to trust
But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But i believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do
I know if I could find the words
To touch you deep inside
You'll give my dreams just one more chance
To let this be our last goodbye
But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But i believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do
That's something only love can do
~ “Only Love” by Trademark
One of my favourite songs of all times. Who can resist the soulful tune and the melancholic lyrics? Furthermore, this song kind of reflects how I am feeling at this point in time. Maybe it is to do with my best friend’s wedding this Sunday. Or maybe it is to do with a recent outing I had with someone.
No, this is not another “falling in love and not sure what to do, where things are going” post. My emotions are still in tact, thank goodness! But I was up at 2:00am in the morning, reflecting on a few things. I can hear some sighs and remarks, “Not again!” Yes, yes, I know, not again! But ever since I came back from down there, I have not had the chance to spend time thinking about issues.
In any case, a close friend from secondary school was asking to meet for dinner, with another close friend of ours. There used to be three of us (with a few others) hanging out together after school and during recess. Even though we ended up in different classes and activities, we would still hang out and call each other after school. I have known them for like half my life now, and despite us going separate ways in our own lives, we still keep in contact once in a while. All these before I even knew my current best friend.
Anyway, we were thinking of meeting up next week for dinner. How things have changed! One is already married, one is attached, and me, well, everyone knows what my status is. The strange thing is that I was the first among them to be attached, and even when they went in and out of relationships, my relationship then was pretty stable, so of course everyone thought I would be the first one to get married, and they were remarking how boring I was to be stuck with the same guy all my life!
Little did they know I rather be stuck with the same guy all my life than to have such a “colourful” life. My cousin just asked about my social life last night, and she was asking if I would ever settle down, as it seems she had lost count on the number of men I have mentioned to her. Well…
So my married friend was just saying she could only make it during the weekdays. Same goes for my attached friend. Whereas I said, anytime they can make it, it is fine, as I am the only single one so has no boyfriend or husband to accompany! :-D And that sparked off a discussion on whether it is better to be single or attached and married.
The grass is always greener on the other side. In any case, men are the least of my problems now, what with the recession and retrenchment and work frustrations going around. When you are fighting hard to survive, bread and butter issues are more important than mere feelings and emotions.
But I still cannot help but reflect just exactly what is love? If one is to ask me this just last year, I would have given a very shallow answer. Love is doing things for the other person, is making the other person happy, is enjoying the other person’s company, is wanting to be with the other person.
All these are so superficial! Love does not mean giving flowers or gifts; neither does it mean being the same or doing the same things. Love means being there for the person through happy times and sad times. Love means setting the person free. Loving someone does not mean needing to be with someone.
Love means taking care of the person’s needs, family and friends like how you will take care of your own family and friends. Love is not instantaneous, neither is it overnight. Rather, it is built on a solid foundation before being able to cultivate into something beautiful. Love does not mean giving and taking all the time, neither does it mean compromising all the time.
I should know. Loving a person does not mean compromising on the very principles and values you hold dear. Rather, love means accepting the person’s strengths and weaknesses. But if there are things you cannot accept, then drop it and move on. Love is not jealous or possessive. Neither is it insecure.
Love is not kicking up a fuss when the person neglects you, or takes a long time to respond to you, or does not wish to go out with you. Love is understanding that a person needs space. Love is giving the person full trust. Only be being confident and secure can the love blossom. Most importantly, love means commitment.
The ultimate act of love is to be committed to the person. Of course, not everyone who is committed will get married. Some are willing to stay in domestic partnership for the rest of their lives, or as long as they can. To each their own. But in general, commitment means settling down with the person, and not looking around anymore. It means once you have made the choice, stick with it and take things as it comes.
Perhaps what I state out above is the same as what I used to say. But I believe I have grown. I do not need romance or people telling me how much they like me or miss me; but real action. Real things need not be said, but done. Keep promises and take initiative, instead of just calling and talking. And that is mature love, not childish love anymore.
Here we are at the crossroads once again
You're telling me you're so confused
You can't make up your mind
Is this meant to be
You're asking me
But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But i believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do
In your arms as the dawn is breaking
Face to face and a thousand miles apart
I've tried my best to make you see
There's hope beyond the pain
If we give enough
If we learn to trust
But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But i believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do
I know if I could find the words
To touch you deep inside
You'll give my dreams just one more chance
To let this be our last goodbye
But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But i believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do
That's something only love can do
~ “Only Love” by Trademark
One of my favourite songs of all times. Who can resist the soulful tune and the melancholic lyrics? Furthermore, this song kind of reflects how I am feeling at this point in time. Maybe it is to do with my best friend’s wedding this Sunday. Or maybe it is to do with a recent outing I had with someone.
No, this is not another “falling in love and not sure what to do, where things are going” post. My emotions are still in tact, thank goodness! But I was up at 2:00am in the morning, reflecting on a few things. I can hear some sighs and remarks, “Not again!” Yes, yes, I know, not again! But ever since I came back from down there, I have not had the chance to spend time thinking about issues.
In any case, a close friend from secondary school was asking to meet for dinner, with another close friend of ours. There used to be three of us (with a few others) hanging out together after school and during recess. Even though we ended up in different classes and activities, we would still hang out and call each other after school. I have known them for like half my life now, and despite us going separate ways in our own lives, we still keep in contact once in a while. All these before I even knew my current best friend.
Anyway, we were thinking of meeting up next week for dinner. How things have changed! One is already married, one is attached, and me, well, everyone knows what my status is. The strange thing is that I was the first among them to be attached, and even when they went in and out of relationships, my relationship then was pretty stable, so of course everyone thought I would be the first one to get married, and they were remarking how boring I was to be stuck with the same guy all my life!
Little did they know I rather be stuck with the same guy all my life than to have such a “colourful” life. My cousin just asked about my social life last night, and she was asking if I would ever settle down, as it seems she had lost count on the number of men I have mentioned to her. Well…
So my married friend was just saying she could only make it during the weekdays. Same goes for my attached friend. Whereas I said, anytime they can make it, it is fine, as I am the only single one so has no boyfriend or husband to accompany! :-D And that sparked off a discussion on whether it is better to be single or attached and married.
The grass is always greener on the other side. In any case, men are the least of my problems now, what with the recession and retrenchment and work frustrations going around. When you are fighting hard to survive, bread and butter issues are more important than mere feelings and emotions.
But I still cannot help but reflect just exactly what is love? If one is to ask me this just last year, I would have given a very shallow answer. Love is doing things for the other person, is making the other person happy, is enjoying the other person’s company, is wanting to be with the other person.
All these are so superficial! Love does not mean giving flowers or gifts; neither does it mean being the same or doing the same things. Love means being there for the person through happy times and sad times. Love means setting the person free. Loving someone does not mean needing to be with someone.
Love means taking care of the person’s needs, family and friends like how you will take care of your own family and friends. Love is not instantaneous, neither is it overnight. Rather, it is built on a solid foundation before being able to cultivate into something beautiful. Love does not mean giving and taking all the time, neither does it mean compromising all the time.
I should know. Loving a person does not mean compromising on the very principles and values you hold dear. Rather, love means accepting the person’s strengths and weaknesses. But if there are things you cannot accept, then drop it and move on. Love is not jealous or possessive. Neither is it insecure.
Love is not kicking up a fuss when the person neglects you, or takes a long time to respond to you, or does not wish to go out with you. Love is understanding that a person needs space. Love is giving the person full trust. Only be being confident and secure can the love blossom. Most importantly, love means commitment.
The ultimate act of love is to be committed to the person. Of course, not everyone who is committed will get married. Some are willing to stay in domestic partnership for the rest of their lives, or as long as they can. To each their own. But in general, commitment means settling down with the person, and not looking around anymore. It means once you have made the choice, stick with it and take things as it comes.
Perhaps what I state out above is the same as what I used to say. But I believe I have grown. I do not need romance or people telling me how much they like me or miss me; but real action. Real things need not be said, but done. Keep promises and take initiative, instead of just calling and talking. And that is mature love, not childish love anymore.
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