Different Business Entities

Last Thursday after the photo shoot and the audition, I went for the first of six sessions of a Fundamentals of Corporate Governance course, which my company sponsored me to. The session touched on the various different entities, like sole proprietorships, partnerships, limited partnerships, limited liability partnerships and companies, and which entity can convert or upgrade or downgrade to which.

It was like law school all over again! We had an intensive lecture on company law, incorporation of companies, taxation and tax havens, case law and landmark cases where the plaintiff unsuccessfully sued the defendant on the use of the company name as passing off or causing confusion.

When I took at the set of course handouts, I panicked, as the first session already had like hundred pages of notes! But the instructor only covered the powerpoint slides (twelve slides in all), the rest was for us to read on our own. At least this course seems practical and useful, especially for the kind of work which I am currently doing. Hopefully by the end of the six sessions, I can more or less know how best to do my work effectively and apply the theories covered!

Housekeeping Weekend!

I actually survived! Yeah! A housekeeping weekend, that is. I was off housekeeping for the August CHOICE weekend. Being a participant was an experience, now being part of the hospitality crew is an even bigger experience.

Because we have to be hospitable, everything have to be ensured that things are running smoothly, from the food to the utensils to the stationery to the hall setting to flowers decorations to making the participants feel welcomed to taking care of their every need.

If you think it is easy, try surviving on just four hours of sleep in three days. Long after the participants have gone to bed, we had to prepare the food for breakfast the next day, so we ended up boiling macaroni, shredding chicken and chopping small tomatoes in the dead of the night.

We ended up getting up before the sunrise to start cooking. We ended up grocery shopping at seven in the morning. And barely when one meal was done, we had to start preparing for the next. Plus all the cleaning up after all the meals! But it was all worth it, as the participants seemed to enjoy themselves so much, at least they seem better than the participants during my own weekend!

By the time I reached home last night, I could barely walk straight! It is not an easy feat trying to feed an army of people, who, for some reason, these participants can really eat! They kept asking for second and third helpings even! Even six hours of sleep last night was not enough for me! Yet it is back to work again today, hopefully I can keep myself awake!

The Expert's Brush

My makeup and hair for the photoshoot yesterday was really natural. I look almost fresh-face on camera. And I am proud to say I look really pretty too. It is really amazing what makeup and hair does to a person!

The thing is the makeup was not anything fanciful, I can go out of the studio into the streets looking like that without people staring at me as if I have layers of paint on my face. Yet the makeup artist did use lots of cream and powder to make me look natural.

There was hardly any colour at all - the foundation, creams and powders blended into the colour of my skin, the blusher was a natural flush, even the lipstick looked natural. The only thing that stood out was my eyes, but even then they were not overly made up, yet I know the layers of makeup I had is definitely much more than what I would normally wear.

Well.. no wonder he is the professional and I am not. The kind of makeup I put on myself, people can tell I am wearing makeup, and sometimes may appear a bit too heavy, making me look more sallow. Yet with the layers the artist put on me yesterday, the most people could see was that I have a natural flush and pronounced double eyelids (thanks to eye taping!), yet I look more natural than when I put on makeup myself! Blending is indeed very important!

And the hair, it was nothing fanciful too. All the stylist did was to sweep my fringe to the side and held it in place with hairspray, and the rest of my hair she tied it into a ponytail. All she did was take a strand of my hair from the back, made it into a knot, then slipped the rest of my hair into the knot, making a ponytail without even using any rubber or elastic bands, holding it up with just a few pins! Expert!

I never had a ponytail ever since I left school. People know I always prefer to let my hair loose, thus I do not really use hair accessories. I do not tie my hair unless I am doing sports, even then it will be just into a ponytail, unless I bun up my hair on special occasions. So when I left the studio yesterday, I look really good! Much younger at least!

The best thing was that, for some reason, a couple of guys suddenly came to talk to me on the streets. Hmmmm.... I have always swear by makeup, and yesterday's incident made me affirm all the more that the right makeup and hair really brings you places! It is really good to look good!

Not A Model, Not A Singer

The photo shoot yesterday went okay, but the audition was screwed up. The photo shoot was for a certain magazine. I must say, they are really professional indeed! I got a makeover which includes makeup, hair and one change of clothes. But the posing! Oh gosh!

I had to sit on a wooden cube and leaned against the wall. I am no model, so the posing was quite excruciating. I would much rather prefer to just stand up and do my own thing, instead of having to do a certain pose with a smile plastered on my face throughout! I am not stranger to makeovers, but this was somehow different, since the Art Director was there and he had to tell the photographer which pose to let me be in! Hence the pressure.

Still, the whole thing went pretty well. If anything the whole process was fun, and I got to work with jolly people - the makeup artist, the hairstylist, the Art Director, the photographer and even the journalist and editorial assistants! At least I come to a long-overdue conclusion - I am not a model be!

The audition, on the other hand, was really screwed up. The audition was for my school's alumni group to see if I can sing the school song during the graduation ceremonies of a few batches, and to record the song for circulation amongst the school.

When I went into the recording studio, I was greeted with a panel of four "judges". The strong air-conditioning, coupled with the fact that the audition would be live and recorded, and facing the judges made me almost have a nervous breakdown!

The worst thing was that the CD I brought somehow could not be played, so I had to end up singing a ca pella, and with my nervousness, plus the fact that my throat suddenly clammed up and voice came up croaky, think I sounded really bad. Now I know how the Idol contestants felt! As it is, I can never be a singer too, no matter how I psyche myself to perform solo!

Legacy Planning ....

Last night while talking to my friend, I was thinking of whether I have enough coverage. I still have a couple of policies from my previous insurance firm, which I was thinking of surrendering but was advised against.

Currently, I am thinking of taking one that caters to women, but he gave me one that is less expensive and still caters to major illnesses. He advised that the plan I am eyeing is better for married ladies and parents-to-be as that gives comprehensive coverage to the unborn child from birth defects, if any.

I am already covered for major illnesses, hospitalisation (government and private), savings and investment, life and health. I do not need anymore medical or major illnesses. What I need is more savings and investment that can generate good returns and not keep making losses, but I seem to have enough savings plans already.

Hence I took up one more policy on legacy planning. How this plan works is you pay a certain premium for ten to fifteen years (depending on how much you are covered), then after that no more payment for the rest of your life. You can just sit back and enjoy yearly disbursements. A year after you take up the policy, you are also entitled to bonus cash back, until after the tenth or fifteenth year and you just reap the fruits.

You can either opt for yearly cash returns or keep it until the end of your life, and that policy will then be transferred to your child after he turns twenty-two. He can then opt for yearly cashback or keep until the end of his life, after which the policy can then transfer to his child upon the age of twenty-two. So this policy can go on for three generations.

Sounds too good to be true right? I had my doubts too. Initially when I saw the presentation, I thought it was too good a deal, after all, I only pay for ten to fifteen years, will there be enough money to have yearly cashback until the end of my life, and still have enough to transfer to my next two generations?

But when I took a look at the black and white, everything is stated. Really sounds too good to be true. But it is a very good idea to start planning for my next generation, however far off it sounds. Afterall, the policy can always be transferred to my next of kin if I happen to die intestate and he can then use it for his next generation.

Hence I took it up. Mine is already on the low end of the scale, but in the event I do have a family, I can always increase the premium again to cater to my next generation. Hopefully this covers all bases and I have enough on my plate now!

Do Not Put All Your Eggs In One Basket

Recently I had a feeling something was wrong with my insurance policies. The agent I was using is actually my friend. When she left the original insurance company I was under, she moved my policies over to her new company. Since then she had been rather pushy when she wanted to hard sell, but left me alone when there was nothing to be done.

Last year I got to know a guy who later joined that company. I find him rather good to speak to and he comes across as sincere and genuine, none of that hard selling and pushiness. Plus he really goes out of the way to help. Hence I transferred all my policies over to him, and asked him to check out and give his professional advise.

Last night he told me that something was indeed wrong with my investment policies. Due to the financial crisis last year, my investment policies have lost quite a bit. That is very bad news indeed! After my loss last year, I thought things are at least getting better, but now even my CPF funds have made quite a loss!

He said because I put all my eggs in one basket, as advised by my other agent. Hence, he has to transfer all the funds out and put them into different funds so the risk is lower and returns higher. But it will take another few years to break even at least, let alone generate returns!

I gave him carte blanche to do as he pleases as I have been under him for a year and he has proven to be pretty well-versed in his industrial knowledge, much better than the other agents I have come across. The few friends I recommend him to all sing praises of him too!

What really pisses me is that my other agent did not bother telling me I have made a loss! Even as a friend, she did not deem to let me know. If I did not have the gut feeling to check out the policies, I would never have found out! She was so pushy last year when she wanted to introduce a new product, and kept pressurizing me to set up an appointment with my mum and her together until I really lost my cool, but when it comes to things like this, she did not even tell me?!

Now I can only keep my fingers crossed that everything will start to be well again and I will not make too big a loss this time! I depend on those to buy my own place and retirement next time, so they have to grow and not lose! A lesson learnt : never ever put all my eggs in one basket!

Just The Way You Are ....

A song that absolutely fits me! How I wish there will be someone who can love me just the way I am!

Don't go changing, to try and please me
You never let me down before
Don't imagine you're too familiar
And I don't see you anymore

I wouldn't leave you in times of trouble
We never could have come this far
I took the good times, I'll take the bad times
I'll take you just the way you are

Don't go trying some new fashion
Don't change the color of your hair
You always have my unspoken passion
Although I might not seem to care

I don't want clever conversation
I never want to work that hard
I just want someone that I can talk to
I want you just the way you are.

I need to know that you will always be
The same old someone that I knew
What will it take 'till you believe in me
The way that I believe in you.

I said I love you, and that's forever
And this I promise from the heart
I could not love you any better
I love you just the way you are.

~ Just The Way You Are (Billy Joel)

The Chinese Language - A Foreign Tongue?

For the past several weeks until last Tuesday, there was a variety show on foreigners speaking / learning Mandarin. The foreigners come from places like United States, Romania, Israel, exotic places where there is hardly any Chinese people around, and no exposure to Mandarin. Yet these people are able to speak better Mandarin than me, what a shame (on my part)!

Of course their Mandarin is not perfect. They still need help in sentence construction and usage. And they are still unfamiliar with our local slang. But their pronunciation is very good already, hardly any foreign accent, they speak as if they are native speakers! That is why they put me to shame, as for someone who had been learning the language all the way until secondary and with parents who are Chinese-educated until pre-university, I still cannot pronounce the words properly!

Come to think of it, locals here are a narrow-minded and shallow lot. They always think they are the best, look down on others, but many people here cannot even speak English or Mandarin properly, despite coming from a bilingual education background. Some of the better educated people from so-called "lesser" countries can speak fluent English, and several other languages!

There are more and more people around the world learning Chinese, be it in speech or usage. If we do not upgrade and keep up, soon we will be left behind. Which is why I enjoy talking to someone more seasoned and worldly, but it is very rare to find a local here that is like that. Many I come across are too sheltered in their own worlds. They do not think of upgrading, yet get threatened by those who are too capable! Perhaps that is why these are the people who never improve and get left behind after a while, which is not a good sign for them.

Sudden Influx Of Activities!

It had been an exciting weekend for me, not because of the activities I had, but because of the news of impending activities. For some reason, everything is going to be scheduled on this coming Thursday, plus the other activities which I have long committed to, makes a very busy two weeks.

First, I have an appointment with a certain magazine on Thursday for an interview. After that, it will be an audition for my school to see if I can sing for the graduation ceremony. Then, the course my company sponsored me to will start on Thursday night.

On Friday, it will be my turn at housekeeping for the August CHOICE weekend. My Australian relatives are coming back on 2nd September for a night after their holiday before going back to Australia and Malta again.

I will be helping out at an open house at my school on 5th September, after that it will be the Michael Learns To Rock concert that night. Not to mention two upcoming dates after a siesta of a year!

All of a sudden I have an influx of activities! But it is good, at least I can be kept busy rather than just leading a mundane life! Looking forward to a temerarious Thursday! Praying that everything go smoothly and I can lead a more enriched life in whatever way!

Monday Blues ....

I started sniffling and coughing last Wednesday. My voice started to go on Thursday. After reaching the office on Thursday, I felt really under the weather, so I excused myself to see a doctor and found out that I was down with common cold, no swine flu, thank goodness!

So I was on medical leave for Thursday and Friday. Friday night I went out to meet my cousin-godma and another cousin. Saturday I had a gathering at my place for the April CHOICErs, to discuss the welcoming and making of the cards for the August CHOICE weekend, where I cooked spaghetti and provided drinks and writing / drawing materials.

Saturday night I went to watch “District 9” and “Coco avant Chanel”. I think I was still feeling unwell then, or perhaps it was because I was seated in the front row nearest to the screen, or perhaps it was due to the way District 9 was filmed, but I started developing motion sickness while watching the show – headache, nausea, felt like lying down. Still it was not too bad.

Sunday I decided to take it easy. My nose is still a little blocked but luckily no more coughing and my voice sounded alright, otherwise I may not be able to make an audition this Thursday! Anyway I am back to work today, but the entire server was down, so I was not able to access my mails or do online filing, hence most of the work was suspended in the morning. I could not clear and reply to my emails! Just when I thought it could not get any worse, the fire alarm sounded. What a way to start a Monday!

Dating Tips From Gurus

Lately I have been reading a lot of relationship articles. The tips are nothing which I have not already known, but I still like reading those articles because it makes me realise that it is not just local men that are oddballs, jerks, weirdos, or whatnots. What happened to me happened to many people in the world too, and there are many women in the world who are equally looking for a serious relationship but meet only losers.

Initially I thought it is just an Asian thing, with the chauvinism and the mentality of Asian men not willing to take a backseat to the more capable women of modern times. Then I realise there are many men in the Western world who do the same things too. Either they behave in an immature way, or they totally get scared off by capable women.

All I can say is there are many men in the world, no matter what country, that are equally insecure, lost, unreliable and not serious. So I am definitely not alone! These women are also equally frustrated at the quality of men they have been meeting lately. These incidents are enough to let women throw their hands up in despair and wonder where all the good quality men are?

In any case, the articles have a few tips for women :

1. Never initiate a contact. For instance, if the guy whom you have been dating for some time suddenly says he is too busy during the weekend and makes plans without you, then leave him alone and do not call him. Make your own plans, have fun without him. If you so much as mean anything to him, he will call you on his own.

2. If a guy suddenly disappears or blows hot and cold, stop entertaining him. Do not initiate a date or contact him. If he realises you are not grovelling at him, he may then start to really treasure you and initiate the contact. Otherwise you know where you stand.

3. Be yourself in a date. Do not go all out to try to impress. Be confident of who you are and do not make it seem you fall at a guy's feet, even if he may be someone you really really like.

There are other tips as well, but these are the basic ones that really work in common situations. Essentially, one should not make herself so readily available all the time. If the guy is really keen, he will be the one who refuses to let you go and be the one who chases you with all his effort without you asking or pining. A guy who is really into a girl will put her as his priority.

These are really true! I have seen it for myself! My female relatives and friends in loving relationships are those where the men do the chasing and really into the girl, the men are more keen than the women. I am not saying the women are not keen, but it is the men who are putting in more effort to ensure the girl he loves is happy above all else.

Whereas in the past I was always the one more keen and putting in more effort, the men just took for granted they could relax and not do anything, and worse, cheated me and left me hanging to die. How I wish I can find a man who truly loves me and my happiness means more to him than anything else!

Where were all these articles when I was growing up? Then I would have saved myself lots of trouble and heartache!

Thinking Of An Apple

I have not shopped for a long time now, so letting me loose in a shopping mall now is like letting a mouse loose in a cheese factory. There seem to be so many nice things lately! I am trying to control by not buying but sometimes the temptation really gets too great. Still, I have not bought any thing for the past few months, which is a good feat!

Speaking of that, the main thing I need to get at this point in time is a laptop. Actually it is not that urgent, considering I use my office laptop most of the time, but I rather use my own laptop at home and when I travel as my office one is a bit bulky. People know I am into small gadgets, so I rather have one that is portable.

After many recommendations, I have decided to get a MacBook. Yes, this seems a year of defecting. After I defected mobile service providers, now I am defecting from Microsoft to Apple. There have been many good reviews about Mac, some of my cousins are using a MacBook, I have friends who prefer Macs, and technology reviews all rave about Mac being better than Vista, which truth be told, it is precisely due to Vista that my laptop was giving me so many problems!

I cannot wait for the next IT Fair now!

Breaking Down Of Gadgets

It is official. My laptop has died. It has been standing on its last legs for ages, until it gave more problems this year. I reformatted and fixed it out twice, my friend did it for me, and still it would not function properly. Yesterday it conked out for the last time. After two years and more than six months, it has officially dug its own grave. R.I.P., Fujitsu.

So now I have to source for a new laptop. I am thinking of the new Sony Vaios TT25, in Gold / Beige. It is eleven inches, as small as it can get, that comes with a CD / DVD player, with Blue Ray at that! Of all the small laptops I have come across, this is the only one that comes with everything in tact, the rest of the smaller laptops do not have CD / DVD players anymore!

Think I will wait for the next IT Fair to see if there are any good promotions or deals. For that, I may as well get a new digicam too. Thinking of getting one that can take nice night shots, underwater, snow, beach, sunrise / sunset, gourmet, fireworks, etc. Just wondering which brand and model is the best?

An International Reunion

The reunion went well today, as usual. Since everyone was here, we had a full family portrait with the third and fourth generations, as well as those attached and soon to be married. In the end, it was thirty of us (plus a dog) which the photographer managed to take into a big family portrait. After that it was family by family with my maternal grandma, so four families altogether. Since there were little kids around, the photographer acted like a clown and use props and toys to get the kids attention so as to get a good shot.

We proceeded to the restaurant for lunch after that. It was an exclusive restaurant open to members only. My uncle is a member so he got us a room and booked five tables. Come to think of it, I am finding it a drag going for big massive gatherings like that. Firstly, all the cousins my age and younger are either attached, engaged, married and with kids. So these would usually be seated together.

Next would be the "kids" table for, erh.. the younger ones, as in those who are newly graduated or still studying, so their ages range from sixteen to twenty-five. And because I am still single, I am often put at that table, even though I am no longer that age. The next few tables will be the Indonesian relatives, the old folks like my grandma, grand-uncle and the sons of my late grandpa.

The daughters and their partners (my mum and aunts) will then be at another table. This is Chinese tradition for you - the segregation of the hierarchy and ranks of the generation, the separation of the sons and daughters as sons will always be of a higher rank than the daughters, hence only the sons are deserving to sit with the parents and the daughters have to sit on a separate table.

Now, my cousins are all high-fliers. Even the younger ones are from the integrated programs to do straight 'A' levels without going through 'O' levels. Those newly graduated are from Masters or top grads, for instance, one of my cousins recently came out in the news for being the top Oxford graduate in law. Not to mention the number of doctors, Masters and PhDs from my this side of the family.

Hence I always feel so idiotic sitting with them and amongst them. I always do not wish to talk for fear of saying the wrong things. I feel so low among them, as they always seem so much more knowledgeable and talking about higher order things that are beyond my level. Still they are nice people, I just do not wish to sound and feel like a fool.

Looking at my cousins and their other halves, I cannot help but envy how blissful they look. Yes, I know my family is quite massive. And they are loud and outspoken, especially my mum, with her bossy and domineering personality. Even one of my newer cousin-in-laws remarked that we are a rather sociable family, not like his where everyone just keep quiet and stare at each other.

So why were the men I dated before never wanted to come along for massive family gatherings? Why do the guys whom I met lately always get frightened off when they know my qualifications, what I am working as and where I stay? I am not the powerful one, it is my mum and the rest of my family. Why get scared off? So why are my relatives able to find mates that can mingle and will not be scared off? Sometimes I really wonder if I am the only one born under an unlucky star, that I cannot even seem to succeed in anything!

If It Is A Sign, What Does It Mean?

Is it a coincidence or is it a sign? For the past few months, I have been writing in my petitions and praying to God to provide the right one whom He deems most suitable for me. Now, there is still no one in sight. Yet within three weeks, I heard from the same person twice, someone from the past whom I no longer want to have any contact with, someone who cheated me, broke my heart, left me in the lurch, I went under depression because of him, and when the whole tirade was over I thought it was good riddance and I never wanted to have anything to do with him anymore!

So I lived life per normal, getting better, and I really did not hear from him ever again. That was about two years back now. I even deleted his number away. When suddenly, three weeks ago, he sent me a message and asked if we could go for lunch. I was shocked beyond words. I deleted the message. Even though I had deleted his number away, I could still remember what it was.

Then today, I received another message, asking if we could meet for a drink and a coffee. Now just what is he up to? Has he not hurt me enough? As if hurting me and making me miserable was not enough, he had to put things in a public forum indicating he was the one who was victimised and I did not understand him?! What is not to understand if he just wanted to play with my feelings right from the start?

All these while I was praying for the right one, when I heard from no one but this. If it is a sign, I seriously wonder what it is? If I let it go, will I have then give up a chance of getting hitched ever again? But if I do not let it go and entertained, who is to say history will not be repeated? I may not be a bright person, but even the dumbest person will not get herself cheated and played with more than once by the same person!

I do not know if it is a sign from God, but the God who loves everyone, does He really want me to be in a miserable state again, knowing what had happened to me and all the drama behind it? I really wish someone good will enter my life and not someone who had made my life so miserable! I just want to be happy and have a happy life with a happy family, with a reliable and responsible man who will not cheat and not be self-centred, and not one who thinks he is always right and blames whatever happened on others, is that really too much to ask?

Growing Pangs (In Reverse)

My youngest brother came back for a surprise visit last night. I was on my way home after the talk when someone at home called me. The moment I heard his voice, I was shocked! Apparently, since everyone from overseas is coming back and we are having a family portrait taken of everyone tomorrow, my mum packed him back as a gift for my grandma, and a surprise for everyone.

I am happy to have him back of course, as it will be another few months before I get to see him again, so why am I feeling down? Maybe because of how he is being treated? He is like the little emperor, everyone gives allowance to him, especially me, because he is the youngest. So why am I always the one who has to give allowance, what makes others think I do not wish to be given allowance? Just because I am the eldest I have to be the one always giving in?

The thing is, when I was younger, I could still throw tantrums, my mum would just ignore me or tell me off not to be too wilful. But now that I am this age, it will seem too petty and childish if I get bitter and throw a tantrum, but it does not mean I am any happier to see the blatant biasness and favouritism being shown. Yeah, people always say he is the youngest, he is still young, give in, give in.

But the fact is he is no longer young. At least he is not a little kid anymore. He is already an adult. My parents sponsored him overseas to study and willingly gave him a supplementary credit card to use as his disposal while overseas. My mum refused to send me overseas to study if I could not get a scholarship. I had to get a sponsorship for my own tertiary studies, then gave tuition and worked every vacation so as to earn enough for living expenses, as my parents never gave me enough pocket money. What my brother is getting is three times more what I was getting then.

Sometimes I wonder is it because he is the youngest, or is it because he is a boy? Is it because I am the eldest or is it because I am a girl? I cannot even whine or show any envy as it will make me seem as if I do not care about my brother or that I begrudge whatever my parents have given him and not me. Sometimes I do begrudge, I do wonder why I am the one being treated differently, but as I said, as the years go on and one is supposed to be a mature adult, any tantrum will be unbefitting of someone my age.

Oh well... it is not that I do not love my family, but if things have been different, if I had been treated the same way as my brother is being treated now, perhaps things will have been different for me. I would have gone places because I have the full support of my parents and people who love and care for me. Then I would not have faced so much struggles and difficulties in my life and would have long been successful in career and even love.

The Split Between Spirituality And Reality

Yesterday evening a friend and I went for the last session of the Living Faith talk by the Lay Dominicans. A month or so ago, I posted an entry about the first part of the Living Faith, on the grey area between being a good Christian and being just human. Last Friday was the last session of the talk.

Last night's talk was on the split between Work and Religion. I missed the previous session due to a CHOICE Story-telling, so I could not give a proper unbiased feedback on what the sessions are like, but at the end of the whole session, it has been rather enlightening somewhat.

Essentially, one must try to be a good Christian and adhere to the Christian way of life. However, how do we split between the things we need to do in our lives and religioin? For instance, if we need to work overtime but had to be involved in a church activity at the same time, which comes first? The boss is not going to let you go just because you need to be religious; rather he wants you to finish work first rather than anything else. Similarly, your church leader may frown on you as to him, God comes first.

I experienced that when I was undergoing baptism. That period of time, I changed jobs in the interim. As a result, I had to settle in my new job and spent more time at work. I missed a few baptism classes. The leader was quite upset with me. She said I have to adhere to my principles, that is why she always told her boss never give her overtime on that day due to her church commitments.

However, work has to be done means work has to be done. My boss is not going to say I can go just because I have baptism classes. In fact, I know a friend who got called back from a church camp just because of work exigencies. So how do we split? It seems that we are torn between this issue quite often.

Another issue is the split between our family life and religious life. If I come from a pure Catholic family, then perhaps things will be easier. If my parents are the kinds who put God above everything else, we will have to go to church first and fulfil whatever obligations we have before anything else.

But the fact is my parents are not Christians. They are traditional Chinese parents who view family as above everything else. So even though this weekend is a weekend of obligation to Mother Mary, I have to miss mass due to the international reunion tomorrow. My mum is not going to allow me to back out of a family gathering just to attend church. This has happened too many times already, in the past she would tell me not to go to church and go with her to attend some relative's gathering, but now she tells me there is a gathering and expect me to know what to do.

My ex never understood. To him, his family is pure Catholic, so going to church is a given. Anything else comes only after church. But I have to cater to my family's wishes if a family reunion is at a certain time that clashses with mass. We used to have quite a number of arguments in the past due to that. Just as well he married a Catholic girl from a pure Catholic family.

At times I wonder how to split between spirituality and reality, because in the world we live in now, it is hard to always put God first in every circumstance. Yes, I pray, I go to church, I try to be involved in activities, I try to fulfil my obligations, but when it comes to work and family, these two still take precedence for a lot of people.

Staunch Christians will frown upon this, because to them, they think God is above everything else, but if one loses the job or get a bad report, what is one to do then? If one quarrels or falls out with the parents, what is one to do?

Of course I also wish for the day when everything can be integrated, but the world is not as idealistic as that. So we just have to adapt to situations as best we can and hope for better things to come.

Confirmation

My friend left this morning. I told my boss I would be late and he said I could just take off today if I like, being Friday. I was contemplating whether to do that, but then I figured it is better to save my leave for some other purposes. So I went to work a bit later.

When I reached the office, my boss handed me a letter of confirmation. Wow, has it been three months yet? No wonder last week he gave me an "interview" of my performance, difficulty I have faced and what I aim. Nevertheless I am happy to be confirmed!

This makes me into an even happier mood. I was already in a happy mood this week because of my friend and the international reunion for the weekend, so this really lifts me up even more! :-)

Motivation To Lose Weight

I am now very motivated to lose weight! Not sure if it is due to stability, or that there is more food around the business district, but I have put on weight lately. Those times when I was undergoing treatments at the slimming centre, I managed to lose weight, but this year I seemed to have gained again. Clothes which fit me before have now become a tad tight. My tummy is showing too! Perhaps I need to sign up for slimming sessions all over again!

I have always known it is better to take photos when one is slim and slender. On Wednesday after seeing the bride in her wedding gown and how good she looks (granted, my friend said she is always that slim), I figured I better start getting myself into shape if I want to look good. No amount of nice dressing and makeup can counter a slim and svelte figure. Maybe that is why I do not attract anyone, because I look old, wrinkled, fat and downright awful in photos and real life?

In any case, slimming is good for me too. When I was slimmer, I felt healthier, more motivated and energised, rather than now when I feel so sluggish. Looks like I need to stop eating and start doing something to lose weight! Hopefully my slimming treatments are still valid!

Club Hopping!

My friend wanted to experience the night life here, so we went club hopping. Luckily it happened to be Ladies' Night, so we got complimentary entry and drinks. Initially I thought of starting with Butter Factory, then hit the night spots at Clarke Quay, but by the time we went to Butter Factory, the queue was so long (as usual!) that we decided not to wait and just proceeded to Clarke Quay.

Attica was the first stop. We were lucky that there was a launch of Jean Paul Gaultier's new pink perfume "Madame" so we got a small vial bottle of the same, together with five drinks coupons for champagne rose. However, when we went in, the champagne was all sold out so we ended up getting Bicardi Rum with Coke.

For all the hype I heard about Attica, it was less than impressive. The place itself was quite small and cramped. There were mostly ladies and not that many guys. The music was quite upbeat and the dance floor was crowded. We stayed for a while before proceeding to the next destination - Lunar, where there seemed to be a less crowd.

Lunar is an Asian Fusion Bar. Again, we got free entry and five drinks coupons. We ordered green tea mixed with whisky. When we went in, we realised it is a Chinese live band bar, with three girls crooning Mandarin songs and a guy singing a Cantonese songs. And there were more guys - but due to the kind of music, the guys were either Chinese-educated heartlanders or uncles. Again we stayed for a while before proceeding to our last stop - Powerhouse at St James Power Station.

We got complimentary and drinks coupons again, but did not get any drinks this time. I kind of like Powerhouse the best, because the music being played are oldies and retro mix, kind of more soothing. The people dancing were also enjoying themselves. The songs are catchy and made me feel like dancing. My friend felt the same way too!

As I have had a long day, we stayed for a while and went home after that. It was an enjoyable Ladies Night. For someone who does not really club hop, it was an experience, a good one! Hopefully I have the chance to do that again!

In Person ....

On Wednesday, a fellow blogger from the neighbouring country came down and we finally met up! My first impression was that she looks different from the photos but still as pretty! After having read her blog, she is just as sassy, lively, bubbly as described. I hope I did not give her a less-than-expected impression though, at times I really wonder what kind of impressions people have on me! Perhaps long-winded for one?

Since she needed a place to bunk in for a couple of nights, I offered her my place and she slept with me in my room. I met her and her friends for dinner on Wednesday night, at a fusion Japanese eatery, followed her friend to try on the bridal and evening gown since she is getting married tomorrow, and then we went back to my place to put her luggage down. Since it was Ladies' Night, we then went out for a night of club hopping.

On Thursday, I took the day off and brought her to sample one of our famous local delicacies, then went photo-taking and wondering around Bugis and Little India. After that it was a relaxed day back home, chilling out and chatting. We chatted on various issues, mostly on work, men and relationships. Seems that men behave the same almost everywhere. At times I wonder is it because we really tend to scare men off or they are just losers?

She "checked out" this morning. I am starting to miss her already. It seems so short and time seems to fly so fast. I hope she will come down and stay again, or if I have the chance, to go up and see her!

Applying To Be A Cathechist ....

This year is really a religious year for me. The strange thing is that after attending church for so long, getting baptised and confirmed, I have never had any yearning to serve in church. I was a Sunday Catholic, then for a while, not even a Sunday Catholic, but only an on-off Catholic. Sad, but true.

Then I started making a point to become more active, starting from the CHOICE activities, then the Prayer Meets, then the church choir. And now the latest - Cathechism. I have known about cathechism for a long time now, and have been approached but have always turned it down because I feel my own knowledge of the bible and the way of life is not in depth enough to share with kids.

Two weeks back, when the church was having an announcement about recruiting cathechists, there is something in me that urges me to go ahead. I never have that kind of push before. It was the same feeling I got when I finally decided to get baptised. It was as if it was a calling. All along I never had that urge until lately. Maybe it was time?

I have always known that timing is everything, especially for God, who works things in His time. This year the timing is everything for me in terms of religious activities. Hence I thought why not? Afterall, the best way to learn and improve is to teach and share at the same time. Besides, I do miss my education days. I still find it fulfilling to work with kids and I love kids too.

So my friend and I went to see the Cathechist Coordinator on Sunday. We filled in a form, and she asked us which level and ages we are most comfortable in. For Cathechists at primary level, there may be changes after a year, but for those taking the teenage Confirmation level, they have to follow the kids from pre to post confirmation.

It is just like teaching in a school all over again! There are also classroom lesson plans, assignments, vacation activities, calling parents when the kids failed to turn up, follow up with masses, and Cathechist meetings. The coordinator said she will call us up in November for the training. It looks to be a heavy commitment, but anything for God!

The Wedding Singer

It had been so long since I last sang for a wedding mass, four years to be exact! For some reason, even though I was up in the loft with the church choir and could hardly see the procession, I felt touched by the beauty of the marriage.

Perhaps because to me, all weddings are beautiful as it represents the commitment to be with someone and withstand all his / her quirks, go through happy times and sad times, trials and tribulations, to be together, for the rest of your life. That is the beauty of love.

The songs chosen were all handpicked by the bridal couple as well. So were the readings. What really inspired me was the priest's sermon. He said, "In order to keep peace and happiness in your house, the husband must make the wife happy. Afterall, if the wife is happy, everyone will be happy, but if the wife is unhappy, there will be no peace." Amen!!!

National Day Long Weekend

It was the National Day long weekend, and for once in a long while, I was actually busy instead of being bored with nothing much to do but be a couch potato. August seems to be a busy month for me.

Last Friday I went for a third story-telling session for CHOICE, and this time, I felt emotional and on the verge of tears when I shared my talk. It was rather overwhelming as I did not feel that emotional writing the talk!

On Saturday, I sang for a wedding in church, then went to Novena, and after that for a dinner and movie outing of G.I. Joe. Having never watched any G.I. Joe cartoons or series although I know about them growing up, I watched the movie without expecting anything, yet I find it a much better show than Transformers 2. I like Transformers more than G.I. Joe yet its the latter movie that took my breath away! I will highly recommend anyone to watch it - the special effects are stunning!

On Sunday, I did the usual church activities then spend the rest of the day at home, house cleaning. House cleaning continued on Monday. I am expecting guests for the week, so I need to make my room spic and span, and a more "live-able" condition, in my mother's words. I cannot believe the amount of junk one can accumulate after just half a year (the last time I cleaned my room)!

So it is back to work today. I am so glad it is just a short week (shorter at least). Looking forward to having guests this week and the international reunion for the weekend!

Calling Off A Trip

So my South African trip is called off. I will so love to go, but considering a few factors, it is really not a good time. Firstly, I may not be able to take any leave as my office is shifting to bigger premises end of the year. Secondly, there is massive integration after mergers and acquisitions, so there are lots of loose ends to tie up. Thirdly, I have family commitments due to some issues. Fourthly, since I am now more committed to religious activities, there are definitely lots of activities around the Christmas period.

It is a pity as it is a place I truly like to explore, but at times, one has to weigh the circumstances and see what is more important. I hope my friends who are going enjoy themselves thoroughly, as it truly is a beautiful place! Timing is important in whatever things we do. Perhaps I can still go there next year after the World Cup when the tourist season is not at the peak. Or I can always go another time, adapt another route and travel around on my own, if my parents allow, that is!

Spot On!

I have not done any of these blog quizzes for a while, but these are really spot on!

You Are A Car

You're the type of person who likes to do things your way. You're a little stubborn. You're very expressive and a true individual. You don't like to compromise. You are a very private person. You value your alone time. While you may seem self centered to some, you are actually very cooperative when you need to be.

What Type of Transportation Are You?

You Are the Living Room

You are laid back and casual. You can have fun in almost any situation. You believe in being easy going. Life's hard enough, and you're not going to make it any harder. You are sociable and friendly. You welcome almost anyone into your life. You are completely unpretentious. You prefer living in a comfortable home to living in a showy home.

What Room of the House Are You?

You Love Being Single

In general, you're very happy being single. You like doing your own thing, and you're happy not to have to compromise. You're not opposed to being attached, but you're not going to settle. Someone else should your enhance your life, and you're happy to wait for that person.

Do You Hate to Be Single?

You Are a Natural Beauty!

You're the kind of beauty that every guy dreams about... One that looks good in the morning - without a stitch of makeup That's doesn't mean you're a total hippie chic though You have style, but for you, style is effortless

What Type of Beauty Are You?

You Are Loafers

You are confident, powerful, and successful. Hard working and business like, you always dress and act appropriately. You are consistent and a bit conservative. You aren't really susceptible to trends, although you always dress well. While you tend to be formal, you know how to adapt to your surroundings. So are professional at work... but more laid back when your with your friends. You should live: In a huge city You should work: In a competitive field where you can rise to the top

What Kind of Shoe Are You?

You Should Date An Australian!

You're a down to earth, outdoorsy kind of girl And you need a guy who can keep up with your adventures A rugged Australian guy is just your style Better start learning how to surf!

Which Foreign Guy Should You Date?

Hmmmm.... that's it! I am going to call my cousins and ask them to bring me some eligible Aussie guys when they come over next week! :-p

You Are Rain

You can be warm and sexy. Or cold and unwelcoming. Either way, you slowly bring out the beauty around you. You are best known for: your touch Your dominant state: changing

What Type of Weather Are You?

Any relation to that Korean heartthrob? ;-p

Of WORK, WINE And BEER

Something funny which I received from a friend.

The Center for Disease Control has issued a medical alert about a highly contagious, potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally, by hand, and even electronically. This virus is called Weekly Overload Recreational Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from your boss, any of your colleagues or anyone else via any means whatsoever - DO NOT TOUCH IT!!! This virus will wipe out your private life entirely. If you should come into contact with WORK you should immediately leave the premises. Take two good friends to the nearest liquor store and purchase one or both of the antidotes - Work Isolating Neutralizer Extract (WINE) and Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system. You should immediately forward this medical alert to five friends. If you do not have five friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.

Chinese Alliteration?

One example why you have to write Chinese characters properly :

Come to think of it, if I am to split the characters of my Chinese name up, it will sound suspiciously like a Japanese name ....

Message In A Bottle

I got so inspired by Nicholas Spark’s “Message In A Bottle” that I start having crazy ideas about writing a love letter or poem, placing it in a bottle, then throwing it into the ocean or river and let it flow. See who can find it. Hopefully the person who finds it will be the one for me!

But who am I kidding? Most likely the bottle will end up at the bottom of the ocean or sea, only to be fished or drift upon shore many years later, by which time I have probably left this world. Or got washed ashore into some African coast and got picked up and then destroyed by the natives.

So just how high are the chances of someone even finding that note in the first place? Or someone decent enough? Still, it is rather fun to just place a note in a bottle and then throw the bottle into the ocean and let it drift ashore to no man’s land. Yes, I get lots of crazy ideas at times!

Love Letters In The Snow

I just re-watched the Japanese show “Love Letter”. I remember watching it many years back when it was screening at the old Picturehouse. That time when I watched the show, I was really touched. I remember wanting to visit the places in Japan that were the filming locations of the movie.

When I went to Japan in 2006, I totally forgot about the show. But that time when I went to Japan, it was a trip by my mum to cheer me up, and there were just too many things on my mind, so other things took a backslide. I did not even remember calling on my penpal the last time round!

Then when I went to Japan last year, we saw from a tourist brochure that several places in Otaru were the filming sites of the show. The first time round when I went to Hokkaido, we went to Otaru but I could hardly see the resemblance. In any case, a place looks different in the summer than in the winter.

So I decided to get the VCD and re-watch the show. It is still so touching even though I am watching it for the second time! The show started out with a girl (Watanabe Hiroko) at the anniversary of her late fiance’s death. She was at his grave with his parents and drove his mum home. The mother told her stories of his school days in Hokkaido, and that they lived in Otaru before moving to Kyoto. However, their old house in Otaru had since been torn down and now a highway runs over it.

To keep the memories of her fiancé alive, she found his name in the year book (Fujii Itsuki) and copied down the address. For some reason, she wrote to the address. Her letter stated, “Dear Fujii-san, How are you? I am fine.” The address she copied down was not that of her late fiancé but of a girl of the same name, who coincidentally looks a lot like her. When the female Fujii Itsuki received the letter, she was bewildered. To pique her curiosity, she wrote back.

Hiroko was shocked she received a reply, so went to her fiance’s best friend and confided in him. After exchanging a few more letters, she and the friend decided to go up to Otaru to clear up the mystery for themselves. It was winter, so there was snow everywhere. Through some incidences, she realized that the one she was corresponding with is a female, and alive and kicking. She happened to be the high school classmate of the male Fujii Itsuki.

Thus they started corresponding, with the female Itsuki telling Hiroko what she could remember of the male Itsuki during school days. Hiroko realisesd that she looks a lot like the female Itsuki, and wondered if her late fiancé fell for her because of that reason, as she suspected he actually liked his female classmate of the same name. At the end of the show, Hiroko managed to let go of her past memories and moved on in her life, while the female Itsuki realized that her male classmate of the same name did like her after all, and was too embarrassed to tell Hiroko about that.

It is a very heartwarming show. The title “Love Letter” refers to the letters exchanged by the two girls, but the symbolism goes much deeper than that. In real life, letter writing is useful, to keep in touch, to tell people you love them, to apologise. Nowadays, everyone uses email, who really writes letters in this time and age?

But I am for the old-fashioned way. Somehow emails are just too impersonal. Of course emails are a good way to keep in contact, and instantaneous too. People can talk to each other just using emails alone. But at times, I do still like to write letters, on cute scented paper. It is the presentation and the nice thought that people actually take the trouble and time to pen down words.

Somehow handwritten words speak a lot. The American author Nicholas Sparks and his wife fell in love while exchanging letters with each other. My ex and I used to keep in contact while any of us were overseas by writing letters and exchanging them when we saw each other again. In olden days, people would write letters in order to court a girl.

Call me old-fashioned or sappy or romantic or hopeless, but I still like writing letters. Except now in order to flow with the trend, a mere email or even instant messaging will do. But if I ever fall in love again, I will definitely write letters to him, love poems, terms of endearment, whatever couples do. That is how I used to keep my love alive, and letter-writing works almost all times!

"Puss" In Boots

I used to wonder why people generally think locals do not know how to dress, as compared to our other Asian counterparts. So I tried being fashionable yesterday. I wore a white knitted dress with knee-high boots. I think I look good, and my friend said so too!

However, I start to understand now, why it is that we do not dress like our North Asia counterparts. It is not as if we do not like to wear the same kind of clothes. For instance, I am pretty happy carrying off a woollen cap, or boots with shorts, or boots with jeans and whatnot, but it is due to the weather that people do not dress like that.

I wore the boots for just the evening, and already I could feel my legs perspiring! Imagine dressing for cooler climates in hot and humid weather! I have no idea if anyone was looking at me with an incredulous look because no one here actually dresses like that, but still, who cares as long as I look good?

Despite it all, I will want to pull off this combination again. It makes my legs slimmer, gives the impression I am taller and I feel so much more confident when I look good, so why not? Who cares how others think anyway?

A Packed Saturday

It was a pretty packed Saturday. I went to Novena in the morning, then to the Science Centre for the Da Vinci exhibition as well as the Van Gogh film at the Omni-Theatre, before proceeding for a dinner and durian feast, ending with drinks at a cosy cafe in the East Coast.

The Da Vinci exhibition was an eye-opener indeed! A pity photograpy was not allowed. I was able to see a timeline of his life and the major events that took place during the Renaissnace period. his paintings and inventions, and how he helped the French court.

The highlight of the event was The Last Supper and Mona Lisa of course! Apparently, The Last Supper was commissioned to be painted as a depiction of Jesus with the traitor Judas Iscariot in the picture. There was a short documentary on the colour scheme and how Jesus was meant to be the centre focus of the entire painting.

The documentary on Mona Lisa addressed certain mysteries on who she really was and the original colour scheme of the background. Apparently, the background was more bluish, but through the years, after being exposed to environmental factors, the colours faded and now it became more greenish, hence people always thought Da Vinci meant the entire colour scheme to be greenish and black.

The Van Gogh film is good too! It told of his life and paintings, including his self-portraits and how and where he got his inspiration. I always wonder why we do not seem to have artists of the calibre of these two men nowadays?