Today is 080910. What a wonderful number! And I will be going for an AWARE Night, organised by the prominent feminst group here. How did I get involved in this? Well, after the recent Social Mission Conference, I yearn to do more for the community. I have been doing some form of "community service" on and off, like sponsoring a child in the Philippines, chaperoning kids to a magic show, and going to Batam for a half-day teaching mission. However, I feel as if I can do more.
For the past few weeks, I have been contemplating what else I can do. It is not enough just sponsoring a child, going on ad-hoc trips and signing up for mission trips. I want to be able to do something more actively and to be more involved, otherwise I will lose my momentum.
While deliberating, I came across this article that got me boiling with rage. I do not know whether it is a coincidence or divine mercy that made me stumble onto this article, all I know was that upon reading it, my heart went out to the poor girl. Yes, she drank, yes, she consented to have sex with one of the guys, but these were not the main issues here. The main issue is that, why, when a girl got raped, is she always the one that got blamed? Why not blame the men who are not even decent enough to control themselves and just forced themselves on the poor girl who had no idea what transpired?
That was when I realise, even though this is supposed to be a modern and progressive society, it is sad that in general, people still view women as mere sex objects and not hold her opinions and capability seriously. Even now, how many parents will tell their sons to go for a girl who is better than him, who is more educated and more capable? Chances are, most parents will tell their son to find a girl who is demure, soft-spoken, family-oriented, willing to stay home and take care of the family. Which is why many men still grow up with the notion that career women do not make good wives and mothers.
But when I saw how my Australian Marketing Director and my Irish Chief Technology Officer each bringing their respective babies to the office last week and this week, I start to wonder, why do I only see Caucasian men having a hand in child-raising? It was so sweet the way my Marketing Director nursed his baby to sleep while he was conducting his meeting at the same time! The two men are high-ranking staff, and their wives are equally capable, yet when their wives are away, they take care of the babies and have no qualms nursing them, changing them or feeding them.
Yet when it comes to our local men, they cower in this kind of situation, no matter what their job status is. Why so? Does the man not play a part in the parenthood? Why is it always the woman doing everything? To me, I feel that capable and educated women do not necessary make bad wives and mothers, just like educated and powerful men need not cower at child-rearing at all.
Hence, I decided that certain things need to be changed. I am not like other women who go all out to prove they are better than men and that men should kowtow to her, but I do agree that certain things need to be changed. So I signed up to be a member of AWARE - a local feminist group speaking up for women.
I have known of this organisation for a long time, but never really wanted to get involved. In the past, I thought I would be what society deemed me to be - someone who becomes a stay-at-home mother, who makes her husband happy, who is a "little woman". But through the years after seeing real cases on how women suffer because their men only know how to take advantage of them, I start to feel that women should know how to stand up for themselves to prevent their men from abusing them.
After what I have been through, I find it quite hard to really trust a man again. I have total confidence that Mr DC is faithful, and I am very blessed being with him, but even then, I am rather cynical of late whenever someone tells me she has found the most wonderful guy in the world. To me, I always find "very wonderful" guys suspicious. Afterall, why would the guy bother being so ultra nice if he has no ulterior motive?
Hence I decided to get involved. I dare not say I will make a difference, but at least I can be more AWARE of what are the prominent issues facing women in this time and age and in this society. I know how men take to this organisation, so I was hesitant telling him my decision. But then again, I told myself, this is my life, and I want to make a difference, so who cares how he feels? If he thinks women are just complainers and whiners, then so be it, but it is not going to stop me from becoming a member.
Yet when I told him, all he said was, "How to become a member? I want to join too! More people should realise that women can be capable and give them the due recognition, so it is a very good thing to be more AWARE of women issues in society nowadays. In fact, I am going to base my honours thesis solely on gender issues and help to bring up women's equality."
I cannot help grinning from ear to ear when I heard that! If it is any other guy, he would scoff and put me down, but he, he wants to join too, despite it being a women's organisation! I love him, but now, I really, really, really, love and adore him!
For the past few weeks, I have been contemplating what else I can do. It is not enough just sponsoring a child, going on ad-hoc trips and signing up for mission trips. I want to be able to do something more actively and to be more involved, otherwise I will lose my momentum.
While deliberating, I came across this article that got me boiling with rage. I do not know whether it is a coincidence or divine mercy that made me stumble onto this article, all I know was that upon reading it, my heart went out to the poor girl. Yes, she drank, yes, she consented to have sex with one of the guys, but these were not the main issues here. The main issue is that, why, when a girl got raped, is she always the one that got blamed? Why not blame the men who are not even decent enough to control themselves and just forced themselves on the poor girl who had no idea what transpired?
That was when I realise, even though this is supposed to be a modern and progressive society, it is sad that in general, people still view women as mere sex objects and not hold her opinions and capability seriously. Even now, how many parents will tell their sons to go for a girl who is better than him, who is more educated and more capable? Chances are, most parents will tell their son to find a girl who is demure, soft-spoken, family-oriented, willing to stay home and take care of the family. Which is why many men still grow up with the notion that career women do not make good wives and mothers.
But when I saw how my Australian Marketing Director and my Irish Chief Technology Officer each bringing their respective babies to the office last week and this week, I start to wonder, why do I only see Caucasian men having a hand in child-raising? It was so sweet the way my Marketing Director nursed his baby to sleep while he was conducting his meeting at the same time! The two men are high-ranking staff, and their wives are equally capable, yet when their wives are away, they take care of the babies and have no qualms nursing them, changing them or feeding them.
Yet when it comes to our local men, they cower in this kind of situation, no matter what their job status is. Why so? Does the man not play a part in the parenthood? Why is it always the woman doing everything? To me, I feel that capable and educated women do not necessary make bad wives and mothers, just like educated and powerful men need not cower at child-rearing at all.
Hence, I decided that certain things need to be changed. I am not like other women who go all out to prove they are better than men and that men should kowtow to her, but I do agree that certain things need to be changed. So I signed up to be a member of AWARE - a local feminist group speaking up for women.
I have known of this organisation for a long time, but never really wanted to get involved. In the past, I thought I would be what society deemed me to be - someone who becomes a stay-at-home mother, who makes her husband happy, who is a "little woman". But through the years after seeing real cases on how women suffer because their men only know how to take advantage of them, I start to feel that women should know how to stand up for themselves to prevent their men from abusing them.
After what I have been through, I find it quite hard to really trust a man again. I have total confidence that Mr DC is faithful, and I am very blessed being with him, but even then, I am rather cynical of late whenever someone tells me she has found the most wonderful guy in the world. To me, I always find "very wonderful" guys suspicious. Afterall, why would the guy bother being so ultra nice if he has no ulterior motive?
Hence I decided to get involved. I dare not say I will make a difference, but at least I can be more AWARE of what are the prominent issues facing women in this time and age and in this society. I know how men take to this organisation, so I was hesitant telling him my decision. But then again, I told myself, this is my life, and I want to make a difference, so who cares how he feels? If he thinks women are just complainers and whiners, then so be it, but it is not going to stop me from becoming a member.
Yet when I told him, all he said was, "How to become a member? I want to join too! More people should realise that women can be capable and give them the due recognition, so it is a very good thing to be more AWARE of women issues in society nowadays. In fact, I am going to base my honours thesis solely on gender issues and help to bring up women's equality."
I cannot help grinning from ear to ear when I heard that! If it is any other guy, he would scoff and put me down, but he, he wants to join too, despite it being a women's organisation! I love him, but now, I really, really, really, love and adore him!
0 comments:
Post a Comment