I have been doing lots of reflection lately (yeah, what is new right?). In fact, I had been thinking through a lot of things the past few months. Maybe because I have been hurt too often that now I tend to be more wary. Or maybe I am still looking for that someone who fits.
But honestly speaking, there can never be a perfect fit. I can say I want someone of certain calibre, but that person need not necessary fit me. I can say I do not want someone who does certain things, but then that person may just fit me.
What I learnt from a recent experience is that the person I thought who fulfilled everything I wanted in the end turns out to be unsuitable. He has certain shortcomings which I cannot tolerate, values which are opposite mine. Just as well we did not progress, otherwise I would be rather miserable.
God is good indeed. I have not said much about religion for a long time, but in recent experiences, He has opened up my eyes to see beyond what I can see. I must admit, even though he is a good friend, I have wondered if we could progress further. But then after certain things that happened, I realize actually I do not quite like him in the end.
I saw his shortcomings and I told myself no way! I am not going to be with another person who is like that! Once is more than enough! I do not want to end up quarrelling and being emotionally drained again! Coincidentally, this came after I prayed for enlightenment and direction. So it is really not meant to be after all and I am pretty happy to discover that!
Actually, I am no princess myself. I am outspoken, opinionated, stubborn, bad-tempered, grouchy, grumpy, touchy. Neither am I tall nor elegant, nor drop-dead gorgeous. I do not come from a filthy rich family, I do not have parents who pamper me and shower me with all kinds of attention. I am not a successful high-flier that earn big bucks. I have had a tough time growing up and have my own bad habits and quirks too. But as one grows, one learns to be more tolerant of people and things.
For instance, I used to write people off just because they do certain things. But I realize by doing that, it is limiting my pool of already very limited friends. Besides, everyone has their habits and quirks, no one is perfect. So instead of getting up on a high horse and start turning my nose up at everyone, why not just make friends and give chances?
So I did that. And I discovered more gems. These people, despite having irritating habits, are actually very nice. Much nicer than those who appear wholesome yet totally hypocritical in the end. I am glad I learnt how to tolerate and hang out with them, otherwise I will never discover more wonderful people around.
Afterall, everything is about giving and taking. Whether amongst friends, acquaintances, lovers, couples and family, it is all about accommodating, compromising and tolerance. If I like someone to take me for who I am with all my shortcomings and imperfections, then I have to learn how to take others the same way. That is what interaction and socializing is all about!
But honestly speaking, there can never be a perfect fit. I can say I want someone of certain calibre, but that person need not necessary fit me. I can say I do not want someone who does certain things, but then that person may just fit me.
What I learnt from a recent experience is that the person I thought who fulfilled everything I wanted in the end turns out to be unsuitable. He has certain shortcomings which I cannot tolerate, values which are opposite mine. Just as well we did not progress, otherwise I would be rather miserable.
God is good indeed. I have not said much about religion for a long time, but in recent experiences, He has opened up my eyes to see beyond what I can see. I must admit, even though he is a good friend, I have wondered if we could progress further. But then after certain things that happened, I realize actually I do not quite like him in the end.
I saw his shortcomings and I told myself no way! I am not going to be with another person who is like that! Once is more than enough! I do not want to end up quarrelling and being emotionally drained again! Coincidentally, this came after I prayed for enlightenment and direction. So it is really not meant to be after all and I am pretty happy to discover that!
Actually, I am no princess myself. I am outspoken, opinionated, stubborn, bad-tempered, grouchy, grumpy, touchy. Neither am I tall nor elegant, nor drop-dead gorgeous. I do not come from a filthy rich family, I do not have parents who pamper me and shower me with all kinds of attention. I am not a successful high-flier that earn big bucks. I have had a tough time growing up and have my own bad habits and quirks too. But as one grows, one learns to be more tolerant of people and things.
For instance, I used to write people off just because they do certain things. But I realize by doing that, it is limiting my pool of already very limited friends. Besides, everyone has their habits and quirks, no one is perfect. So instead of getting up on a high horse and start turning my nose up at everyone, why not just make friends and give chances?
So I did that. And I discovered more gems. These people, despite having irritating habits, are actually very nice. Much nicer than those who appear wholesome yet totally hypocritical in the end. I am glad I learnt how to tolerate and hang out with them, otherwise I will never discover more wonderful people around.
Afterall, everything is about giving and taking. Whether amongst friends, acquaintances, lovers, couples and family, it is all about accommodating, compromising and tolerance. If I like someone to take me for who I am with all my shortcomings and imperfections, then I have to learn how to take others the same way. That is what interaction and socializing is all about!
2 comments:
Er.... outspoken, opinionated, stubborn, bad-tempered, grouchy, grumpy, touchy... sounds like me, lol.
Really? Good that you have a loving husband. A pity these are the qualities which "scare" the men away from me! :-p
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