My first brother needed a new phone, so I took the opportunity to get him the red Motorazr v3, complete with a new card. Now I am happy I can do my part for (Product) Red. In the end, he said the phone is too girlish so used my old phone instead, with the new card. Oh well, it does not matter, I can use the phone for myself and keep the other new one I have as a spare.
My youngest brother's examination results will be released today. Needless to say, my whole family is in a nervous frenzy over it. The results released today will determine if he can make it to university, and which university, which course, and if it would be the course he likes. His entire future will be determined just on the examination results alone.
This reminded me of those times when I would be in a nervous state doing the examinations, and then would be in an even more nervous state awaiting the results. My parents expected nothing less than perfect scores or straight As, and this is something I have never ever achieved in all my years of studying. I really envy those who can get straight As so easily!
So each time the results were announced and I failed to make an A, I would go home dejected, scared out of my skin as I had no idea how my mum would lecture me again. As I mentioned, the way she lectures can cause severe emotional damages in a growing child. This happened year after year.
I made the top thirty of the cohort every year, but never the top, and even though I always ended up in the best class, it was never enough for my parents, especially with cousins who always scored perfect scores and top of the cohort year after year. So whenever my relatives and parents were comparing results, they would proudly say my cousins were top (again!), and my mum would then whisper that I only made the top twenty, never even the top ten, let alone the top.
National examinations were worse as they determined which school I would go to, which course I could be in. With precedents of perfect scorers before me, I was expected to meet up. Thus, when my Primary School Leaving Certificate reflected only 2 A*, 1 A and a B, I was horrified. Never in the history of my family (my generation) has anyone scored less than 3 A*, and certainly no one ever scored a B! My mum was so disappointed that she did not talk to me for a week after that.
The same thing happened during streaming in Secondary Two. I was expected to make the triple science class, as everyone had made the triple science class, and the schools they attended were much better than mine. To make the class, one would be ranked according to results scored in English, Literature, Mathematics and Science. It must be a full A1 for Mathematics and Science and at least a A2 for English and Literature before one had the chance to make the class.
So when the examination results were released, I barely made A1 for Mathematics and Science, and A2 for English and Literature. I was fretting over which class I would end up in, and when I saw the list, my name was right at the bottom for the triple science class. I made it through the skin of my teeth. I was relieved, but on the other hand, I would have much preferred to be in the pure Arts class with the combination of Geography, History and Literature.
My secondary school leaving examinations were worse. I was so nervous that I hardly knew if I wrote the correct answers in the examinations. As with precedent, I could not score less than eight A1s, and I was taking nine subjects. When the results were out, my mum was next to me. My fingers were shaking when I was tearing the sides of the sheet bearing my results.
When I saw the results, I wanted to cry, not for joy. I only made five As - three A1s and two A2s. The rest were Bs and Cs. First time someone in my family achieved Bs and Cs instead of just As. I saw the big frown on my mum's face and I knew I was in trouble.
Since then, my results never picked up. The examination I took to determine a university place only achieved three As, instead of four as expected of me. My tertiary examinations were worse. As were almost non-existent, mostly Bs and Cs, and even though I graduated with a Pass with Merit, it was not enough with all the first-class honours, scholars and top graduates I am facing.
It had been very stressful growing up. My brother never seem to have as much stress. Perhaps because my family has more girls, and the girls are smarter and more capable than the guys, and to me, I am considered the worst of the girls as no one can ever understand why is it I can never score as well as the rest, and I can never understand how is it anyone can score so well so easily. Meanwhile, I have submitted my assignment and will be in a nervous frenzy next week when the tutor returns the assignment, as I have to see if I can at least achieve an A this time round.
My youngest brother's examination results will be released today. Needless to say, my whole family is in a nervous frenzy over it. The results released today will determine if he can make it to university, and which university, which course, and if it would be the course he likes. His entire future will be determined just on the examination results alone.
This reminded me of those times when I would be in a nervous state doing the examinations, and then would be in an even more nervous state awaiting the results. My parents expected nothing less than perfect scores or straight As, and this is something I have never ever achieved in all my years of studying. I really envy those who can get straight As so easily!
So each time the results were announced and I failed to make an A, I would go home dejected, scared out of my skin as I had no idea how my mum would lecture me again. As I mentioned, the way she lectures can cause severe emotional damages in a growing child. This happened year after year.
I made the top thirty of the cohort every year, but never the top, and even though I always ended up in the best class, it was never enough for my parents, especially with cousins who always scored perfect scores and top of the cohort year after year. So whenever my relatives and parents were comparing results, they would proudly say my cousins were top (again!), and my mum would then whisper that I only made the top twenty, never even the top ten, let alone the top.
National examinations were worse as they determined which school I would go to, which course I could be in. With precedents of perfect scorers before me, I was expected to meet up. Thus, when my Primary School Leaving Certificate reflected only 2 A*, 1 A and a B, I was horrified. Never in the history of my family (my generation) has anyone scored less than 3 A*, and certainly no one ever scored a B! My mum was so disappointed that she did not talk to me for a week after that.
The same thing happened during streaming in Secondary Two. I was expected to make the triple science class, as everyone had made the triple science class, and the schools they attended were much better than mine. To make the class, one would be ranked according to results scored in English, Literature, Mathematics and Science. It must be a full A1 for Mathematics and Science and at least a A2 for English and Literature before one had the chance to make the class.
So when the examination results were released, I barely made A1 for Mathematics and Science, and A2 for English and Literature. I was fretting over which class I would end up in, and when I saw the list, my name was right at the bottom for the triple science class. I made it through the skin of my teeth. I was relieved, but on the other hand, I would have much preferred to be in the pure Arts class with the combination of Geography, History and Literature.
My secondary school leaving examinations were worse. I was so nervous that I hardly knew if I wrote the correct answers in the examinations. As with precedent, I could not score less than eight A1s, and I was taking nine subjects. When the results were out, my mum was next to me. My fingers were shaking when I was tearing the sides of the sheet bearing my results.
When I saw the results, I wanted to cry, not for joy. I only made five As - three A1s and two A2s. The rest were Bs and Cs. First time someone in my family achieved Bs and Cs instead of just As. I saw the big frown on my mum's face and I knew I was in trouble.
Since then, my results never picked up. The examination I took to determine a university place only achieved three As, instead of four as expected of me. My tertiary examinations were worse. As were almost non-existent, mostly Bs and Cs, and even though I graduated with a Pass with Merit, it was not enough with all the first-class honours, scholars and top graduates I am facing.
It had been very stressful growing up. My brother never seem to have as much stress. Perhaps because my family has more girls, and the girls are smarter and more capable than the guys, and to me, I am considered the worst of the girls as no one can ever understand why is it I can never score as well as the rest, and I can never understand how is it anyone can score so well so easily. Meanwhile, I have submitted my assignment and will be in a nervous frenzy next week when the tutor returns the assignment, as I have to see if I can at least achieve an A this time round.
0 comments:
Post a Comment