I am quite surprised at myself actually. Due to a recent article which I was sort of involved in, people have been making all kinds of remarks in those online forums which I go in once in a while. One of my friends (helpfully or unhelpfully) gave me the link to some of those forums, so I went in to take a look.
And what those people said reeks of lameness and shallowness. Some I would view as sour grapes. Which states my point exactly – many people here are shallow. Honestly, why judge someone you do not know personally? Just because of an article, which incidentally was misquoted because the tabloid paper wanted a bit of sensation?
Anyway I was more amused than upset at the immaturity of some people. As I said, many people do not think of the big picture, they just take things on the face value without thinking deeper through. The thing is in the past if something like this came to my attention, I would have been really upset. Now I just read through and then ignored the blatant childish remarks.
Which is why I am quite surprised at myself. Maybe people are right – I have become unfeeling. Or perhaps immune. Whatever it is, nothing much really affects me nowadays. Even in light of the problems I am facing, I still remain cheery. It is not as if I am not bogged down (by my problems, not the forum threads). I am, especially late at night when I could not get to sleep, I will start tossing and turning and praying and wondering how to go about solving everything.
But being bogged down with one’s problems does not mean needing to find fault with everyone else in the world. I can go around being upset, but does that help matters? Will everything be resolved just because I show everyone how upset I am, and that I am clearly a problematic person? Upset or not, problematic or not, I still have to go to work, still have to socialize and be nice to people, still have to be there for others when they talk to me.
I used to let things bother me, but now I realize no matter what happens, one still have to go on in life. After all what is it I have not gone through? I am not saying I have gone through a lot in life, but still, since young, whatever that could have happened had happened.
Bad grades, problems with parents, rebellion, love and relationship, men and women, friends, health, work, money, siblings, religion. Okay, I have no right and I cannot compare with those born in the less priviledged countries where they really know what is hunger and poverty, but in our society, whatever social problems I could have faced I have faced (I think).
I have messed up examinations before and screwed up a scholarship and chances of studying in a top university abroad. I have had problems with my parents and siblings for years. I have been rebellious before and ran away from home for a few hours, making my dad drive round the estate looking for me.
I have lost loved ones before. I have had a broken engagement. I have taken a long time to get over someone. I have entered a relationship on a rebound without fully thinking through. I have had friends who took advantage of me and cheated me. I have been cheated of my feelings and money, not just once but a few times.
I have had problems with men who just want to get fresh or want to leech off me. I have had broken friendships, quarrels with people, then got betrayed. I have been hospitalized. I have lost jobs before. I have had my uncertainties with my religion. I have been embroiled with office politics, often to my disadvantage. I have lost my savings to poor investment and been broke and in deep debt.
And now I am creating a “social problem” by being single, looking and not finding, not being able to get married and have kids and start building up the population and contributing to the society’s mould of the younger generation.
So what is it I have not gone through? Perhaps next time when I am ever in a relationship again, when I get married, when I have a family, there will be more problems. I am not such a naïf that I think there will be no problems if and when I ever find the right person, but after having been through more downs than ups, I believe I will be able to handle other kinds of adversities.
Like the carrot, egg and coffee bean – I hope to be the coffee bean that will face whatever the environment throws at me and changes the situation, instead of being hardened or softened by many adversities one has to face in life.
And what those people said reeks of lameness and shallowness. Some I would view as sour grapes. Which states my point exactly – many people here are shallow. Honestly, why judge someone you do not know personally? Just because of an article, which incidentally was misquoted because the tabloid paper wanted a bit of sensation?
Anyway I was more amused than upset at the immaturity of some people. As I said, many people do not think of the big picture, they just take things on the face value without thinking deeper through. The thing is in the past if something like this came to my attention, I would have been really upset. Now I just read through and then ignored the blatant childish remarks.
Which is why I am quite surprised at myself. Maybe people are right – I have become unfeeling. Or perhaps immune. Whatever it is, nothing much really affects me nowadays. Even in light of the problems I am facing, I still remain cheery. It is not as if I am not bogged down (by my problems, not the forum threads). I am, especially late at night when I could not get to sleep, I will start tossing and turning and praying and wondering how to go about solving everything.
But being bogged down with one’s problems does not mean needing to find fault with everyone else in the world. I can go around being upset, but does that help matters? Will everything be resolved just because I show everyone how upset I am, and that I am clearly a problematic person? Upset or not, problematic or not, I still have to go to work, still have to socialize and be nice to people, still have to be there for others when they talk to me.
I used to let things bother me, but now I realize no matter what happens, one still have to go on in life. After all what is it I have not gone through? I am not saying I have gone through a lot in life, but still, since young, whatever that could have happened had happened.
Bad grades, problems with parents, rebellion, love and relationship, men and women, friends, health, work, money, siblings, religion. Okay, I have no right and I cannot compare with those born in the less priviledged countries where they really know what is hunger and poverty, but in our society, whatever social problems I could have faced I have faced (I think).
I have messed up examinations before and screwed up a scholarship and chances of studying in a top university abroad. I have had problems with my parents and siblings for years. I have been rebellious before and ran away from home for a few hours, making my dad drive round the estate looking for me.
I have lost loved ones before. I have had a broken engagement. I have taken a long time to get over someone. I have entered a relationship on a rebound without fully thinking through. I have had friends who took advantage of me and cheated me. I have been cheated of my feelings and money, not just once but a few times.
I have had problems with men who just want to get fresh or want to leech off me. I have had broken friendships, quarrels with people, then got betrayed. I have been hospitalized. I have lost jobs before. I have had my uncertainties with my religion. I have been embroiled with office politics, often to my disadvantage. I have lost my savings to poor investment and been broke and in deep debt.
And now I am creating a “social problem” by being single, looking and not finding, not being able to get married and have kids and start building up the population and contributing to the society’s mould of the younger generation.
So what is it I have not gone through? Perhaps next time when I am ever in a relationship again, when I get married, when I have a family, there will be more problems. I am not such a naïf that I think there will be no problems if and when I ever find the right person, but after having been through more downs than ups, I believe I will be able to handle other kinds of adversities.
Like the carrot, egg and coffee bean – I hope to be the coffee bean that will face whatever the environment throws at me and changes the situation, instead of being hardened or softened by many adversities one has to face in life.
0 comments:
Post a Comment