I find that the older and more experienced someone gets, the more self-focused he / she becomes, so much so that even when love and opportunity comes knocking, he / she tends to miss the boat. Afterall, is it not better to be just alone and carefree, rather than living your life for someone else?
Yet despite all these, why do people want to get into relationships? Is it because they feel lonely, or is it because deep down, everyone really wants a mate, a life companion? But when people get into relationships, do they really know how to handle what it entails?
To me, the word "relationship" is synonymous with "commitment". Afterall, come this age, I do not want to waste anymore time on something that will not go anywhere. But what exactly does a relationship entail? I have come up with my own version of what a "relationship" is all about.
Realistic - Have realistic expectations. If you choose to be with someone, then accept what he can offer instead of asking for the moon, stars and sky. If you cannot accept it in the first place, then do not be in one.
Engaging - Have engaging conversations. This is to do with communication too. Being with someone means you are able to converse intellectually, deeply and with no reservations.
Love - Self-explanatory. Without love and commitment, a relationship cannot even materialise.
Adoration - I do not know about others, but personally, I cannot be with someone if I otherwise do not adore and admire him.
Tolerance - This is a very important element. Without any tolerance, there will be petty fights and tiffs, leading to the eventual breakdown of a relationship. Being with someone means accepting him wholeheartedly, tolerating his faults and shortcomings and shutting your eyes to things which you may otherwise feel irritated about but still bear with it because it is what makes him him.
Indulgence - Indulging in each other's whims, fancies and interests. Being with someone means you make the other person happy and try to indulge as much as possible.
Obligation - Being with someone means you are obligated to the person, to spend time and effort to maintain the relationship and developing the love.
Nurturing - Nurture each other to be the best each can be, with lots of encouragement and support along the way, and never hold each other back with selfish means.
Sincerity - Loving someone means being sincere to him / her, to each other's parents, family and friends.
Homogeneity - Homogeneity is the state of being alike, essentially the same kind. Which means, two people who intends to be together should have certain essential similarities, like outlook, goals, compatibility, for things to flow smoothly.
Interconnection - The connection between two people. Connection is knowing what each other is thinking without needing to say a word. Connection means knowing what each other wants, their thoughts and feelings and mutual understanding without saying much.
Patience - This is another important element. A relationship does not happen overnight. It needs lots of patience and lots of work for it to bear fruit and blossom. In other words, a relationship is not instantaneous, it takes months and years even before it can become solid and stabilised.
I am not sure if I am making any sense here, but I think these elements are essentially what makes a RELATIONSHIP, is it not? ;-p
Yet despite all these, why do people want to get into relationships? Is it because they feel lonely, or is it because deep down, everyone really wants a mate, a life companion? But when people get into relationships, do they really know how to handle what it entails?
To me, the word "relationship" is synonymous with "commitment". Afterall, come this age, I do not want to waste anymore time on something that will not go anywhere. But what exactly does a relationship entail? I have come up with my own version of what a "relationship" is all about.
Realistic - Have realistic expectations. If you choose to be with someone, then accept what he can offer instead of asking for the moon, stars and sky. If you cannot accept it in the first place, then do not be in one.
Engaging - Have engaging conversations. This is to do with communication too. Being with someone means you are able to converse intellectually, deeply and with no reservations.
Love - Self-explanatory. Without love and commitment, a relationship cannot even materialise.
Adoration - I do not know about others, but personally, I cannot be with someone if I otherwise do not adore and admire him.
Tolerance - This is a very important element. Without any tolerance, there will be petty fights and tiffs, leading to the eventual breakdown of a relationship. Being with someone means accepting him wholeheartedly, tolerating his faults and shortcomings and shutting your eyes to things which you may otherwise feel irritated about but still bear with it because it is what makes him him.
Indulgence - Indulging in each other's whims, fancies and interests. Being with someone means you make the other person happy and try to indulge as much as possible.
Obligation - Being with someone means you are obligated to the person, to spend time and effort to maintain the relationship and developing the love.
Nurturing - Nurture each other to be the best each can be, with lots of encouragement and support along the way, and never hold each other back with selfish means.
Sincerity - Loving someone means being sincere to him / her, to each other's parents, family and friends.
Homogeneity - Homogeneity is the state of being alike, essentially the same kind. Which means, two people who intends to be together should have certain essential similarities, like outlook, goals, compatibility, for things to flow smoothly.
Interconnection - The connection between two people. Connection is knowing what each other is thinking without needing to say a word. Connection means knowing what each other wants, their thoughts and feelings and mutual understanding without saying much.
Patience - This is another important element. A relationship does not happen overnight. It needs lots of patience and lots of work for it to bear fruit and blossom. In other words, a relationship is not instantaneous, it takes months and years even before it can become solid and stabilised.
I am not sure if I am making any sense here, but I think these elements are essentially what makes a RELATIONSHIP, is it not? ;-p
1 comments:
well defined! I would add be friend with each other, respect, trust, individuality i.e. giving each other space, and learn to understanding another not just knowing .. I will share later in my blog after learning from "psychiatrist" session :p
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