Lilypie

Friday, December 12, 2008

The Threat Of Love (Part One)

Another Christmas (soon anyway). Christmas is the time to love. Like what is featured in “Love Actually”, at Christmas, you tell the truth. At Christmas, you just want to try and see if the person loves you back. And this Christmas, all I want for Christmas is …. Last year I got my Christmas wish only to be let down a day later, so this year, I am not going to wish for anything at Christmas, just hoping for a happy and peaceful Christmas ahead.

I always re-watch “Love Actually” during Christmas because it is such a heartwarming show, on love of all aspects. Being a movie, things seem so easy to click into place, which can never happen in real life, but still, it is good to watch a movie that deals with the different aspects of love (be it fulfilled or unfulfilled, self-sacrificing and lust) instead of the normal action and violent shows we have.

Lately, I have been re-watching a drama series called “The Threat Of Love”, both parts. This series features twenty short stories on the different aspects of love as well. The first part is more heart-warming as compared to the more humourous second part. Love in a cosmopolitan context and how people deal with it.

In Part One, the first story was about how a playboy pilot got a lady pregnant after a one night’s stand. She got dumped by her boyfriend who went overseas to work and got involved with a girl, so she regretted that she did not get pregnant so as to keep him by her side. Then when she really got pregnant after the one night stand, she told her ex-boyfriend and made it sound like it was his kid, but he made her terminate the pregnancy and she then dumped him there and then.

She decided to keep the baby because she said men will let her down, but her own child truly belongs to her. Somehow she met the pilot again and he found out about her pregnancy. So he moved into her place and said to bring the baby for a DNA test after he was born to ensure he really fathered the child. After moving in, he realized that it was not too bad living with her, and even though she disliked his irritating and irresponsible ways, somehow she started treating him as part of her family. At the end, after she gave birth, he realized he wanted to settle down and he said the words, “I love you” to both the mother and child.

First lesson : loving a person means wanting to settle down with her.

The second story was on a couple of migrants. The lady was raped on the way, and the guy, in order to protect her, was beaten up. Because they were migrants, they were not able to find proper jobs, so she ended up being a waitress, later a masseuse, and he ended up being a security guard, later a loan shark. However he still kept looking out for her.

She wanted to start over a new life, so accepted a matchmaker’s introduction to this foreigner who was looking for a wife, although it seemed more like he wanted a slave than a wife. When the loan shark found out, he gave her the money to offset the amount paid to the guy so she could redeem herself, but she refused. On the day of departure, she finally realized how much he meant to her and turned back, but unfortunately, he was beaten to death by a rival loan shark. She then lamented about how late it was for her anymore.

Second lesson : Love means always being there for the person, no matter what happens, especially when in need. Love means never having to say goodbye, and to cherish it when it is around, not regret when it is gone.

The third story was about how a henpecked pair of father and son-in-law won the lottery and did not let their wives know. Their wives controlled the purse strings so they did not have much money to spend, thus when they won the lottery, they quit their jobs and started spending in lavish, all the time not letting on.

However, their wives (the mother and daughter pair) misunderstood that they were fired from their jobs, so decided to pool out their savings to let them run a business. The men then felt guilty as they felt it was even rarer for a woman to give them money than for a man to give the money. So they decided to tell them the truth. Unfortunately, before they even said anything, the father was kidnapped and the ransom the total amount of the money won.

The son-in-law thus had no choice but to spill the beans. After paying the ransom, they found the father in a box, but turned out he talked and nagged so much that the kidnappers got so irritated that they let him go before the family paid the ransom. Needless to say, he hit the roof when he found out that his family paid the ransom, and in the end, both had to go back to work again.

The message of love was not that obvious here. The men thought their wives did not love them thus controlled them, but in the end, it was their wives who helped them out when they thought they were in trouble.

Third lesson : Love is not the passionate kind shown during happy times, but the support and commitment shown during tough times.

The fourth story is actually my personal favourite, on how a conservative father who favours his sons over his daughter, finally came to terms that not just one, but both his sons, are gays. The story also shows a close aspect of a homosexual relationship, that even though both are of the same gender, the love they show each other may be even deeper and better than the love between two persons of opposite gender. Even though they may never have kids, but they were willing to sponsor and adopt kids, and buy life insurance for each other to protect each other in the event one of them leaves the world earlier.

Fourth lesson : Love transcends genders, cultures and race.

The fifth story is on a mother, who gave her life for her children, only to raise three selfish and ungrateful children. They were supposed to have a stepfather, but he was thrown out of the house by the eldest girl, who hated him for horning into her family. The mother got struck with senile dementia, yet the children refused to believe and thought she was just gaining attention, until one day, she could not remember the way home.

It was only then that the eldest daughter went to find the mother’s old flame and begged him to come back and take care of the mother. He never did forget her as he still sent her birthday cards every year and still displayed her photos in his room, but the mother, in order to let him forget her, lied to him that she was re-marrying. It was only when the eldest daughter told the truth that he came back to see the mother in the end.

Fifth lesson : Loving someone does not mean needing to be with the person, but looking out for the person and wishing blessings and happiness on the person.

The sixth story is on a couple, after having been married for seven years, the husband was starting to itch. So when he met a young, bubbly, whiny girl, he felt on top of the world, because she made him feel needed. Hmmm… is that men’s ego for you, that he wants someone to want him? Yet why do men then dump a girl who is too clingy?

The wife suspected of course, because he has a sudden change in attitude towards her. She chose to remain silent about it until one day, when it was raining heavily and he was supposed to pick her up, he called to cancel because that little girl wanted him to pick her up. The wife caught the girl and her husband together in the car being rather close. Then the girl changed her mind and got out of the car and the husband then called the wife, saying he could pick her up after all.

When she got into the car, he apologized and gave the excuse that he was held up at work, but she just kept quiet. When she leaned over to him in the same position the girl did, he only remarked how wet she was and seemed rather irritated. The next day, the wife found the girl in their house, with her wrists slit. At the hospital, it was discovered that the girl was making use of the husband to get back at her ex, and she attempted suicide because of him too. So the husband realized he had been made a fool, and started being so loving to the wife, but she decided to wage a cold war on him until the end.

Sixth lesson : Maybe it takes a momentary diversion for someone to realize how much his spouse means to him? Love itself withstands everything, even momentary diversions. Love means forgiveness, that even if you suspect your partner is cheating on you, you still take him back in the end.

The seventh story touches on the aspects of a May-November romance, between an older lady and a younger man. She has an established career, money, her own place and car, whereas he is just starting out as a chef. To her, she takes the relationship very seriously, and she is not able to handle all the finger-pointing on why she is running around with a “little boy”.

So she started treating him coldly, hurting his feelings in the process. But he could not get over her, so started visiting her again. This time, they talked things through and he asked why did she not tell him all her fears? Somehow he managed to convince her he was true to her and she agreed to go with him overseas for a better job prospect.

Seventh lesson : Love transcends all ages and boundaries.

The eighth story touches more on true friendship and relationship between parents and children. The main character of the story is not a down-to-earth person. Instead of working and slogging his life away, he rather gets involved in “get rich quick” schemes, and takes chances on gambling and betting, except he never gets rich. Instead, he got into even more debt. His best friend normally has to bail him out and be his guarantor for loans, to the displeasure of his wife. His parents have to continue working and running a store to help him out.

One day, he went on board a ship and gambled, and won with a very lucky hand. So he managed to clear off all his debts, and just when he was about to gamble even more, his parents took away his credit cards and filed for bankruptcy on his behalf, so he had no choice but to help his parents out in their store until he paid back every single cent. The conclusion of the story is that perhaps, it is better to be down-to-earth and live a simple life, instead of thinking how to get rich quick.

Eighth lesson : Love can also be between friends, ie true friends will love you and be there for you no matter what happens.

The ninth story is also a rather touching one. A lady was bored with her marriage life as her husband is just a simple man without any romantic streak in him. She went on a business trip and met a photographer, who got inspired by her and started taking her portrait. They felt attracted to each other and started dining and dancing together. Then she had to go back home and told him the had to face reality and would never see each other again. When she went home, she went back to her mundane life, but was thinking of him all the time.

One night, her husband brought home a guest, and it happened to be the photographer. They used to be classmates. She panicked and could hardly concentrate the whole night. He requested for her to walk him down to hitch a cab, and he confessed how he hoped she would divorce her husband and go away with him. She then told him that they had a beautiful time, and even though he is so much better than her husband in every aspect, still, it was her husband who had been there for her through thick and thin, it was her husband who had shown his love in his own way, it was her husband who took care of her family. So even though she would always keep him in her mind, she could not leave her husband and forsake her whole family.

At the end, she chose her family over the guy she loved, and he went away, upset and alone. A year later, in an interview regarding one of his works, he said he had only loved one woman in his life, but unfortunately they met each other too late. The story ended off with her reading the article, listening to the song they danced to, and then she looked at her husband and smiled.

Ninth lesson : Memories of love are more than enough. Being committed means staying with the person, even if there is someone else better, because in the end, it takes more than love to sustain a marriage.

The last story is quite funny. It talks about how women go to extremes to stop a man’s roving eye. This lady’s husband had been teasing her about her boyish figure, thus she went ahead to get a boob job. However, her plan backfired because her husband, instead of being more attracted to her, actually got turned off, as he said she is not the wife he is used to, and it felt as if he is sleeping with a stranger. In the end, she re-did the operation and went back to normal.

Tenth lesson : If the man really loves you, he will accept you for who you are and not want you to change any part. Men look at voluptuous girls just like how women look at hunky guys, but the one they married will always be their one true love.

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