Lilypie

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Another Intuition ....

I had a sleepless night of tossing and turning, and all of a sudden everything became clear. Strange, I thought a sleepless night would cause one’s mind to become cloudy or hazy instead, yet to me, things are never as clear as before.

I was finding it hard to sleep because besides being depressed over someone’s wedding date, I was also worried about my guy because of certain things. I feel bad that everything bounced off him because of me, and I never like to cause anyone any trouble.

But I had a feeling. You know what people said about a woman’s intuition being mostly right? That I believe too, especially from events in the recent months, where I sort of knew before anything even happened.

This time round, I think my intuition is right again. I told my guy why I was feeling so depressed, and he told me that when someone get married, the date and venue is to their own preference, so it does not have any reference to me, thus I need not worry.

I guess so, but then if I am to get married and know I will be inviting my ex, especially one who almost married me, and one who is so sentimental, I will not choose a venue and date that has special significance exclusively to both of us.

A wedding is to be a very happy and beautiful event, a celebration of union, and not something to show off who the winner is, so I will never dream of making anyone feel uncomfortable or down.

But anyway, my intuition tells me he is not the one that chose the date and venue. Because from what I know of him, no matter how he has changed, I believe he still remembers. And because he is with someone who is the dominant party in the relationship, I believe he just went along with whatever she wants.

From a girl’s perspective, I can understand how easy it is to manipulate a guy. She can always say prove how much he loves her and wants to marry her, and prove that his ex really mean nothing to him anymore, thus chose the particular day and venue, and inviting the ex along.

I know I am being mean and jumping to conclusions. But somehow my instincts tell me so, and I have learnt to trust my intuition as it has proven itself to be true almost all the time. She has never failed to keep bugging me, and doing things to affect me.

But this time I am not going to be affected. Since they specially sent me an invitation, I will reply. I will give them my complete blessings, even send over a wedding gift. I will show that I am happy they are finally married.

But I will not be going, not because the date means anything to me, but because I already planned to go to my friend’s debut novel launch. :-D And besides, I will tell them that I prefer to attend their church wedding and banquet instead, since that is a more formal affair.

Now, I would like to see which date and venue they are going to pick for that.

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