The audition results are out …. and I am out! Not totally unexpected, but still disappointed at the same time. The management sent me an email thanking me for going for the audition, but they feel that I am not “ready” enough for the chorus, so give them a call again next time when I am “ready”.
What do they mean by “ready” anyway? I know my voice is not as polished yet, but I am about to continue my voice lessons. And in terms of commitment and passion and the love of performing, I believe I am more ready than a lot of others.
After more than a year of performing with them, incurring my own time, travelling and food expenses, being kicked around and scolded when we were not up to standard, with no complains and claims as I like to perform, now I feel so cheated. Just like someone stabbed a knife into my back.
If it is really because I am not good enough, which honestly, I am not on par to a lot of others, then I will not feel so down. But then if I am not up to a certain standard, then why did the former Artistic Director passed my first audition in the first place? And she is the one who is opera-trained.
I am not questioning their judgment as the management does have some voice specialists on their panel, but still, if they think me not good enough to be a soprano, then I do not mind going to a Mezzo or an Alto even. Why kick me out totally?
And anyway, my stint in the chorus is more of a learning experience than anything else. I join because I can improve my voice technique and projection, and try to push myself to the fullest. It is the learning experience that really matters to me (that, and hanging out with the cool friends I made).
But now I am not even given a chance to continue my learning experience. How many people’s voices are really that polished anyway? Most of my friends have some sort of training before they can reach a certain standard.
If the panel is looking for natural singers, then perhaps only one percent really qualify, and even then, they will not be part of the chorus but in more major roles. Besides, we are only singing backup and extras, not the main part.
Some of my friends are rather unhappy at their parts too. Sopranos being placed as Altos, Tenors being placed as Bass. The entire chorus is going to be revamped… but honestly, I miss the older days where everyone is happier. It seems like a change in management is making a lot unhappy, as we do not even know what is going on now.
My friend told me that it is their loss, not mine, if they do not give me my due recognition. Oh well… whatever it is, at least now I have some extra time to do other things. Perhaps I can polish up my vocals a bit, then audition again.
Otherwise there are always other choirs around, like Singapore Youth Choir, Singapore Symphony Chorus and The Philharmonic Chamber Choir. But all these are semi-professional choirs where the entrance requirements are even more stringent. So I just have to hope for the best and see where I end up next.
What do they mean by “ready” anyway? I know my voice is not as polished yet, but I am about to continue my voice lessons. And in terms of commitment and passion and the love of performing, I believe I am more ready than a lot of others.
After more than a year of performing with them, incurring my own time, travelling and food expenses, being kicked around and scolded when we were not up to standard, with no complains and claims as I like to perform, now I feel so cheated. Just like someone stabbed a knife into my back.
If it is really because I am not good enough, which honestly, I am not on par to a lot of others, then I will not feel so down. But then if I am not up to a certain standard, then why did the former Artistic Director passed my first audition in the first place? And she is the one who is opera-trained.
I am not questioning their judgment as the management does have some voice specialists on their panel, but still, if they think me not good enough to be a soprano, then I do not mind going to a Mezzo or an Alto even. Why kick me out totally?
And anyway, my stint in the chorus is more of a learning experience than anything else. I join because I can improve my voice technique and projection, and try to push myself to the fullest. It is the learning experience that really matters to me (that, and hanging out with the cool friends I made).
But now I am not even given a chance to continue my learning experience. How many people’s voices are really that polished anyway? Most of my friends have some sort of training before they can reach a certain standard.
If the panel is looking for natural singers, then perhaps only one percent really qualify, and even then, they will not be part of the chorus but in more major roles. Besides, we are only singing backup and extras, not the main part.
Some of my friends are rather unhappy at their parts too. Sopranos being placed as Altos, Tenors being placed as Bass. The entire chorus is going to be revamped… but honestly, I miss the older days where everyone is happier. It seems like a change in management is making a lot unhappy, as we do not even know what is going on now.
My friend told me that it is their loss, not mine, if they do not give me my due recognition. Oh well… whatever it is, at least now I have some extra time to do other things. Perhaps I can polish up my vocals a bit, then audition again.
Otherwise there are always other choirs around, like Singapore Youth Choir, Singapore Symphony Chorus and The Philharmonic Chamber Choir. But all these are semi-professional choirs where the entrance requirements are even more stringent. So I just have to hope for the best and see where I end up next.
10 comments:
Hey you could try SYC. Auditions are 2 sept, quite soon. Can check the details out at their website. www.syc.org.sg (i think)
S.
stop whining
maybe you just do not have a good voice
DUH
If this is something that you love and you are passionate about, then I would recommend persisting.
One lesson I have learned (too late in life I think) is that nobody is going to hand you anything, nobody is going to recognize you, nobody even notices or cares about you - they are all too busy with their own self interest to pay any attention to you.
So, the only course of action for you is to promote yourself, to make people notice you. If you fail at something, or are rejected, then ensure you find out why. Talk to the director and find out what it is exactly that he found lacking in you. Correct it (if you think he is correct).
Persistence is the key. Many authors and artists had to be very, very persistent to achieve any success, to get someone to recognize them.
You are single, you live at home, it is easier for you to take risks than it is for me (married with two kids and two mortgages) to simply take off and pursue my dreams. I always was a waiter. I waited for the right time, I waited until I had a bit more knowledge or experience, waited until I had a bit more financial stability, I waited for someone to notice me. Now there are times when I wish I had not waited and instead been more selfish and pushed myself ahead. I am not immortal and waiting has cost me valuable time.
Haha I like Justin.
You being ready mentally don't mean that they are ready for your voice. and you make mezzo and alto sound like it's inferior to soprano. I'm offended. (Even though I'm a sop who can hit a high high D...not as high as you but high enough i guess. I'm not boasting btw)
As a NATIONAL opera chorus, I think SLO should be up there with all the choirs you named...ie SYC, SSC and Philharmonic. I'm glad that management has finally woken up, after a string of operas with really substandard choral parts, in my opinion. The recent figaro concert was commendable...don't look like they got the whole chorus up there. It's smaller than usual.
I don't agree about Richard about raw passion. Yes, passion can go a long way but you still need that bit of talent to do anything with your passion. And you need to be realistic and recognize the absence of talent where it is absent.
Maybe you should really take voice classes and try a couple more auditions. and if you don't make it, just throw singing away and find something else to do. How about knitting.
I also notice you tend to talk for others alot. "where everyone is happier", "making a lot unhappy". If you're unhappy yourself that you got kicked out, just say that you were happier and the new management is making you unhappy. stop hiding behind others.
Dear Celia, I do empathise with you but I also agree with Justin and Timberlake... perhaps you're not good enough?
And you mentioned that the previous director took you in and she's opera trained? Are you implying that the current is not and thus not qualified to fail you?Wasn't it a panel of people that gave the audition? So all of them have bad ear since if they cannot place you in Sop, they didn't even place you in mezzo or alto?
Are you also saying that since the SLO chorus is only singing backup and extras and not the main part, they can have singers who are not up to standard? But hey, I did recall you saying something about how the last director was desperate when she took you in?? Is that how you get the impression that the standard of the chorus can be compromised?
Now speaking as an alto with more than a little talent (It's a fact and like you, I don't like to boast), I'm terribly annoyed. You can't even reach below a middle C until during the audition and you think you can sing mezzo or alto? It takes more than having a range of middle and low notes to be an alto. How much do you know about placement?
Accept that you're just not good enough this time and move on with your life. If you're not entirely satisfied with the results, talk to someone who can enlighten you. If your friends are unhappy about their placement, ask them to talk to the director.
You should also do what you've been wanting to do, voice class. Perhaps your voice tutor can help you improve so that you stand a chance in auditions.
ALternatively, you and your unhappy friends in the chorus can come together and form your own choir? You can sing whichever voice part that you like, whatever kinds of songs, no need for auditions and even give yourself solo parts!!
-I am an Alto-
Sorry to hear that you didn't make it through the audition. Don't be too disheartened - I gathered from reading your earlier posts that you were half-expecting it anyway. There's always hope for the future. Don't mind me saying objectively, I think you need to learn to hear/listen to your own voice more? I'm no expert, but it seems to me that you have trouble hearing yourself especially in the upper registers. And I'm sure you already know that the sound of your singing voice needs to be a lot more open than it is right now - you sound so different when you speak! (like me! :P) I'm sure if you stick with your lessons and take the time to listen to yourself, you'll find your way up to the "standard" in time to come. :)
-MW
Like all skills, I guess you just need constant, better practice.
It is normal to feel low, especially after "losing out" in what you feel you're good at. What's important is to not stay down.
I remember the speech I made when I was "graduating" from my Japanese language school. I stated that in the modern world (at least at the adult level), there is this tendency that friends have to be "bought".
Now, I would not say that my language and delivery were perfect, but it irked me when people who are clearly worse than me got better review because they picked "more neutral" topics such as "At the Zoo".
(This particular one skipped 30% of the classes, were asleep half of the time he was in, and writes like a primary 3 kid.)
It just made me more determined to be better at the language than he will ever be.
Celia, I apologise for the last para. I realised it was a tad too mean. But do consider. If you want to continue singing, who's to stop you from forming a group with those friends who are unhappy with SLO. The reason why you joined in the first place is because you enjoy singing. But do continue singing as soprano. No everyone can be an alto.
there’ll always be other opportunities.
Firstly, thank you everyone for your feedback. I really appreciate all your views.
To clarify, I am not saying that a mezzo or alto is not as good as a soprano. In fact, they are better as they are able to sing parts which sopranos cannot sing.
All I am saying is that I am used to singing the soprano parts, and if the panel feels that my high notes are not high enough, I can try singing mezzo and alto.
Having said that, I cannot sing alto because I do not have a rich enough voice tone colour, and singing mezzo is probably as best I can do.
So I really admire those who can go low and sing lower parts because at times, singing mezzo and alto forms the entire chorus. After all, without these parts, the sopranos cannot function on their own.
And for those who do not know me, I think it is unfair if you say I do not have a good voice because you have not heard me speak or sing.
I am not saying that I have a very good voice, but after all the choirs I have been in, plus the voice training I have attended, albeit a short while, my conductors (Mr Nelson Kwei, Mrs Lim Yau, Ms Jennifer Tham, Dr Chia Wei Kuan - all very established choral conductors) and voice teacher, including the former Artistic Director, have said my voice quality is there, just need some polishing up.
So, at the risk of sounding too boastful and offensive, I think my voice is not that bad. Of course, there is still lots more room for improvement, not just for my voice but everything I have and do, and I do constantly seek to improve myself.
I have every right to be disappointed because this is the first choir audition that I have not passed, when all along I was able to be in pretty reputed choirs, whether in schools or out of.
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