Honestly, my own experiences with dating agencies are a mixture of good and bad. I have met guys who are intelligent, interesting and articulate, but at the same time, I have also met some who kind of put me off. There is no perfect match in this world, but in any case, take it with an open mind and new friendships can emerge!
A scam of the heart.
A dating service disaster.
That's how singles across the country describe their experiences with a company that claims to be the premier dating service for busy professionals.
"I was absolutely horrified with the experience I had," says Jennifer P. of
Horrified because one of her dates started to stalk her.
"That scared the hell out of me," says Jennifer, who joined the service in 2004. "He called me every day. I had to get my number changed. I asked the company if they do background checks on their clients and they said 'no, we don't need to because every one of our clients is a professional.'"
Not the ones Jennifer dated.
Here's how the company described the so-called professional who stalked her.
"They said I have a fantastic person I'm dying for you to meet," she recalls, adding the company told her it had a client base of more than 3,400 professionals. "He's adorable and exactly the type of person you're looking for. They also told me he owns his own landscaping company."
Jennifer, however, quickly discovered he didn't own a landscaping service. He mowed lawns at a local college.
He also didn't have the two minimum requirements Jennifer requested in her dates: a college degree and a full head of hair.
"This has just been a nightmare. My advice to other singles is to never call this dating service unless they want to open a Pandora's box and waste their time and money."
The dating service touts itself as a "specialized dating service for busy professionals."
A marketing manager founded the company in 1991 after her engagement was called off a few weeks before her wedding. The company is headquartered in
The company claims its staff members have "years of experience and create matches based on personality and physical requirements."
The company interviews clients to determine exactly what they're looking for in a potential partner.
"Our service isn't about video or computer dating," its Web site states. "It's about an insightful, professional staff member hand-selecting appropriate matches based upon your desires, goals, motivations and our instincts."
Singles pay about $1500 for up to 14 dates -- usually at lunch or for drinks after work -- that are supposedly hand-picked by the company's experts based on clients' specific criteria.
Not The Love Connections Promised
But a two-month investigation by ConsumerAffairs.com reveals the company doesn't deliver the "hand picked" love connections promised.
During our investigation, we interviewed more than 30 former clients and employees across the country who say the dating service misled them by:
• Claiming to be experts at matching busy professionals with like-minded busy professionals;
• Claiming to arrange dates based on client's specific requirements;
• Claiming to only have professionals in its files;
• Claiming to have hundreds and in some cases thousands of clients in its files;
• Exaggerating clients' age, profession and other characteristics when arranging dates;
• Refusing to give refunds when dates didn't meet clients' criteria.
Singles also say the company's management blamed them for mismatched dates, asked them to change their requirements in a potential partner, ignored their calls, and sometimes yelled at them -- especially if they had complaints about their poor matches.
"When she finally did speak to me (after leaving 13 messages) she did nothing but act in a totally unprofessional manner," Jennifer P. says of the franchise owner who set her up with the stalker. "Using profanity, threatening me with my money, stating that she does not have to give me a refund, that she can do whatever she pleases with the money, she answers to no one, not even corporate."
Eric S. of
"It's not fair to consumers," says Eric, who joined in 2004. "This isn't a new car. This is potentially a lifelong partner and the stakes are high. You're dealing with people who are lonely and worried about not finding someone. It's easy to prey on these fears."
Former employees confirm the dating service preys on lonely hearts and dupes singles out of their money and dreams of finding a soul mate.
"I think it's a total scam" say Michelle S. a former director in a downtown
Jennifer S., who also worked as a director in the same office, warns consumers: "If it seems too good to be true, it probably is. That line fits perfectly for this company. It's playing on someone's emotions. What is more emotional than the heart? It exploits people who are looking for love."
Attraction to the Company
Tracy M. of
That's why the company appealed to her.
"They tell you they have an entire data base of men and women who are professional people just like you," says Tracy, who joined the service in 2003. "And for $1500, they guarantee you 14-16 dates with someone who is a busy, successful person -- just like you."
But none of the three "love connections" the company made matched
"One guy was manager of an apartment complex, another guy was a student who graduated from architectural school and didn't have a job, and another guy was a handyman," she says. "These are not busy executives to me. This is false advertising.
You can't sucker people and say you have a huge data base of single men when you don't. It's so insane what they do. It's a total scam."
An ad touting the company's professional clientele attracted Stephanie H. of
"It was in one of those in-flight magazines and it looked so believable," says Stephanie, who joined in 2004. "The ad said the CEO of the company was Harvard-bred."
Those Ivy League credentials impressed Stephanie and convinced her it was a legitimate dating service.
But after paying $1200 in advance -- and only going on two dates that didn't come close to meeting her criteria -- Stephanie learned it didn't necessarily live up to its exclusive image.
She did, however, discover she and her second date had something in common.
"He started telling me how miserable he was in the company. And we just laughed through the rest of the date because the whole company is a joke. It's all a sham."
Pick-Up Line
Our investigation reveals the company woos singles with what some Casanovas might consider a great pick-up line.
It's a line that's music to the ears of lonely singles looking for love.
"They told me they had 25 men that fit exactly what I was looking," says Suzanne K. of
She said give me a couple of days and we'll start getting you out on dates."
Jane G. of
"They said they know of four men right now who would be perfect dates in every way for me. I said it's either do this or go to
But these and scores of other singles -- who confirm the company assured them it had several people who met their specific requirements -- say the company failed to deliver the so-called "perfect dates" promised.
"I don't think the people exist, these clients they tell you about that fit exactly what you're looking for," Suzanne says. "I never went out with anyone. They always cancelled or didn't show up. Where are these men who make over $100,000 and who live the same kind of lifestyle that I do?"
Matchmaking Mix-Ups
The company's romantic ruse doesn't stop with the pick-up line. We've learned it also dupes singles with promises that its staff members are expert matchmakers. And first date specialists.
But Eliza H. of
"I told them I didn't want to date any Republicans and also didn't want to date anyone religious," she says. "The first person they set me up with was a Catholic who was also a Republican. The second guy they set me up with was a Seventh Day Adventist."
Eric. S. of Miami, Florida says the company repeatedly set him up with women who didn't meet the ethnic criteria he requested.
"I specifically said I only wanted to date someone who was Latin," he says adding the company's director assured him that would not be a problem when he joined. "And that's where they could not be further off the mark. I got the impression that anyone who came along they were throwing at me. It started to feel like Russian Roulette."
K.G. of Alexandria, Virginia echoes Eric's frustration.
"I place a high value on education," says the Harvard-educated woman who originally joined in 2003. "And they set me up with one guy who couldn't read a menu that was in English and kept dropping the f-bomb. The dates were simply incompatible.
"Circus music should play when these guys pick up the phone, because this office is full of clowns," she says, adding the company also booked dates without her confirmation and gave her the wrong times and locations for dates.
"These guys are the carneys of the dating world -- they promise you a prize, but the game is rigged squarely in their favour."
Not the Dates Described
We've also learned the company misled some singles about their dates' backgrounds -- or left out critical information.
"They said one guy they were setting me up with was an art dealer," says M.B. of
M.B. says the dating service also left out key information about another date.
"He's wonderful, but he is recovering from cancer and they didn't reveal that to me before the date. A few weeks after our date, he was hospitalized.
"Those are little details that speak volumes about the company and how careless they are," she says. "This isn't like handling paperwork. They're handling someone else's life. And charging money for this is almost criminal."
Elizabeth M., an attorney in
"We were talking and then he mentioned his wife. I said 'you're separated?' He said I'm getting a divorce. "I was so offended they would set me up with someone who was still legally married."
Customer Service
How does the company handle complaints like these?
Or problems with dates not meeting the criteria requested?
In some cases, singles say the company downplayed the problems, saying they were oversights. In other cases, the company asked clients to give them another chance.
In still other cases, singles say the company put them "on hold" and didn't send them on dates for a while.
But some singles say the company actually blamed them for mismatched dates.
"At one point I discussed the probability of them not having any matches for me and the director indicated that she felt I was being too picky," M.S. says. "They said that I needed to broaden my criteria.
"The other line I received from them is what they did is an art and not a science," she adds. "After paying $1500, that is not the customer service I expect."
Some former clients also say the company refused to talk to them -- especially if they had complaints about their dates.
"I called when my date didn't show -- the guy I drove two hours to meet," says Suzanne K. of
Kiss The Money Goodbye
Many singles say the company refused to refund their money -- even if it failed to set them up with professionals who met their specific criteria.
Some singles say they just kissed that money goodbye.
"I have not received any type of refund from the company and I specifically asked for at least a partial refund since it did not set me up with anywhere near the type of women I would be compatible with or was attracted to," says Sgt. First Class Mark D. of Rockwall, Texas, an 18-year Army Veteran who paid $1300 in 2002. "I just dropped the whole thing and took it as a learning experience that I got taken."
So did M.S. of San Diego.
"I asked for a refund," she says, adding she paid $1500 in 2004 and only went on four disappointing dates -- all of whom expressed dissatisfaction with the matchmaking expertise. "I took my request to the owner and she said we don't give refunds. She refused."
Some singles, however, have received refunds. But in many cases, they had to take extreme measures to get their money.
Dirty Little Secrets
Former employees say they're sorry -- but not surprised -- by the problems singles have experienced with the dating service.
They say the company trains employees to dupe clients -- just to make a sale.
"It is not a human service, it is a human disservice and a complete snow job," Charisma M., a former director of a Californian
"I feel it's my responsibility to disclose the practices I encountered during my time as a director."
Charisma says the office misled singles by:
• Claiming it carefully matched singles: "There is no 'matching' happening. I would describe it as 'just get them out.' "
• Claming it's selective about its clients - "This is a lie. They are not selective. They just want to get clients in the door. It's all about the sale. I was told to take anyone and everyone."
• Claiming to have more clients than it does - "I was trained and instructed to lie to clients about the current number of members in our
• Claiming to have an equal male vs. female ratio - "We were instructed and trained to lie and say the balance between men and women is 50/50. This is a far cry from the truth. It's more like 80-20. There are lots of women and few men."
• Overstating the number of marriages arranged by the company - Charisma says the company claims it's arranged 10,000 marriages. "I didn't see a system in-house that could possibly track this. I'm curious as to how they would be able to prove this."
Charisma also says the
Former employees at other locations confirm the company used these and other misleading tactics to dupe singles in their offices.
"The whole thing is disgusting," says Michelle S., a former director in the
In many cases, Michelle says, the company intentionally misled clients about their dates.
"I can confirm the coordinator who calls and describes the person is completely lying or exaggerating about every aspect of that person -- age, profession -- to get them to go on the date."
And remember the great pick-up line it uses to get clients to join?
"We were trained to say 'there are four or five people who I can think of right now that would be perfect for you,' " Michelle and other former employees say. "That's part of a script. It's one of our selling points."
Michelle says the
"When I was at the downtown office, they said they had 500 clients for me to work with," she says, adding she wanted to buy the downtown
Jennifer S., who worked as a director at the
"I had a guy who I interviewed and I told the owner 'I can't match him. The owner said 'You take him. You take his money. You can match him.
"I told her he doesn't match any of our girls' parameters. And the owner still made me take his money. She said 'you never know who will come in the door tomorrow. That could be their perfect date.'"
Jennifer also says the clients are not the busy, upscale professionals the company claims.
"They say a majority of the clients are college graduates, bankers, lawyers and doctors. That's absolutely not true. A majority of our men were blue collar."
Here's another "dirty little secret" Jennifer shared about the company.
"Under
Lynn D. of Texas says when she joined as a coordinator in 2004, her office didn't dupe singles.
But that all changed when a new owner bought the franchise in 2005.
"We went from having high class, good looking, and great people to taking whoever had money to join. We had a gentleman who came in and I said this is not anyone our girls will go out with. The director said she couldn't match him. The new owner said if he has the money, take it.
"The new owner also told me to lie to people to get them on dates,"
The Company's Response
The Chairman and CEO declined our repeated requests for an interview and instead gave us a written response, stating his company is proud of its customer service and its reputation.
The Chairman, who is married to the founder, touts the company's success with the following claims:
• It's been in business over 14 years and is the fastest growing dating service in the world with over 85 locations. He states each location is a franchise and is independently owned and operated.
• It has had almost 200,000 clients;
• It has had thousands and thousands of marriages;
• It has the highest client referral and renewal rates in the dating service industry.
He also states that complaints to ConsumerAffairs.com do not reflect the views of a majority of the clients.
"The company has had almost 200,000 clients, and your Web site lists a very small percentage of complaints (less than 1710th of 1 percent), and only a couple complaints from all of 2005 out of our almost 50,000 current clients. In short, the company has had 250 times more marriages than complaints listed on your Web site."
The Chairman also claimed that some of the complaints we received are not from the clients.
"We believe some (if not more) are ....from other people (perhaps competitors) pretending to be clients. It is our understanding ConsumerAffairs.com takes no steps to confirm that complaints they receive are from actual clients." (We did confirm all of the complainants who could be contacted during the course of this investigation).
He adds: "You've also posted complaints from "employees" who never actually worked in an office. (The ones interviewed during this investigation stated they worked for the company and gave us titles and dates. Some people who filed complaints with us stated they interviewed for jobs with the company but didn't start to work for the company).
The Chairman did not offer any evidence to support his assertions and would not agree to speak to us in person or by telephone so that we could ask for such evidence.
He also claims ConsumerAffairs.com isn't fair to businesses-especially those who've resolved consumers' complaints.
"Your Web site does not permit companies to respond to complaints or update clients' views and opinions. For example, in the case where a client's issue is resolved to the satisfaction of the client, your Web Site refuses to remove the complaint or note that the client is now happy."
It is not true that companies are not permitted to respond. Every page of the ConsumerAffairs.com site contains a link to the Company Response Form, a company official said.
It is true that complaints are not removed once published.
"We are not running an extortion service. If a company can simply buy off one or two complainants and have the complaints removed, that does nothing to help other consumers who might fall into the same trap," said ConsumerAffairs.com Editor In Chief and President.
The Chairman also claims the company has a satisfactory rating with the Better Business Bureau and that agency more accurately reflects the company's service record and its clients' views.
Many franchises, however, are not members of the BBB and not all have a satisfactory rating.
For example, the BBB's Web site states the franchise in
Humiliating Experience
M.B. of
"It's terrible PR-hype," she says. "The company can't and doesn't deliver what it promises."
Kim S. of
He says it wasted his time.
His money.
And his dream of finding a partner.
"The whole thing is humiliating and embarrassing. I'm humiliated to think that I could actually be duped by people like this. And most people will not complain because they are so embarrassed by it all."
1 comments:
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