"There is a guy in front of me, who loves me and willing to marry me. There is a guy who can never be mine, someone I can never get, yet he, I want to give my whole heart to." ~ Dr Kate Foster (Sandra Bullock) from "The Lake House".
And such is life, is it not? Since when is life ever so perfect? Often the one you really want to be with is someone that you can never be with, yet the one who wants to be with you, you have no feelings for him. This has happened to almost everyone, even to me. At times I really wonder, why do I keep falling for the wrong person, yet the right person never comes along?
For some reason, I am feeling really moody. I should be happy actually, because in terms of career, I am going places. My supervisor is off on his honeymoon and will not be back until the end of the month. Just before he left, we were told there are going to be major transactions until the end of the year. There will be massive corporate restructuring, mergers and acquisitions, re-branding and integration. Thus, it will be a busy time, so if we are able to achieve all these by the end of the year, we are probably going to have fat bonuses.
The thing is, I am still in the midst of adjusting. And now that he is away, it is up to me to know what to do, what is going on, how to go about doing things. It is a big challenge, and I am feeling nervous, but I just have to grit my teeth and achieve that! What is it I have not done before? In my previous company, I was running the whole department on my own for a period of time too!
But then again, much as I care about my career, it is not the number one to me. I have no qualms giving up my career for my family if need be. So why do I keep getting happier and better on something which is second place to me (not that I do not welcome it), yet the thing that is first place to me, I can never achieve?
I keep being asked to wait. How long more must I wait? Some may label me as desperate, but if I am really desperate, I will not still be so picky. I will have grabbed anyone off the streets. Afterall, in general, men will welcome that. But I am not like that. I am not a loose person, nor someone devoid of values. If I do not like someone, no matter how nice he is to me, I will not accept him because that is being irresponsible on my part and unfair to him.
If I am a man, I will not care so much. I can settle down and father kids even in my fifties. But I am a woman, so things are very different. A woman only has that number of years to bear children. Once past those years, she will biologically be unable to have a child anymore, no matter how much she wants to. This is something men can never understand.
It is perfectly understandable and justifiable why women want to settle down and start a family once they reach a certain age. If the man they are with are not ready, then for their own sake, they should move on and be with someone who is ready and have the same goals. Blame it on the men if they are not able to hold on to the women they love! Why always blame the girl for being fickle and unfaithful?
Just another random raving and ranting. As I said, I have been moody. I am not expecting a fairy tale whatsoever, but as the years go by, and I am not getting any younger, I do wish I can find someone I am willing to carve a future with. I am happy being single, but at the same time, it is so much happier and blissful to have someone to do things together and share my life with. Somehow I feel that there is still something missing in my life, that my life is never complete until I have someone who completes me.
And such is life, is it not? Since when is life ever so perfect? Often the one you really want to be with is someone that you can never be with, yet the one who wants to be with you, you have no feelings for him. This has happened to almost everyone, even to me. At times I really wonder, why do I keep falling for the wrong person, yet the right person never comes along?
For some reason, I am feeling really moody. I should be happy actually, because in terms of career, I am going places. My supervisor is off on his honeymoon and will not be back until the end of the month. Just before he left, we were told there are going to be major transactions until the end of the year. There will be massive corporate restructuring, mergers and acquisitions, re-branding and integration. Thus, it will be a busy time, so if we are able to achieve all these by the end of the year, we are probably going to have fat bonuses.
The thing is, I am still in the midst of adjusting. And now that he is away, it is up to me to know what to do, what is going on, how to go about doing things. It is a big challenge, and I am feeling nervous, but I just have to grit my teeth and achieve that! What is it I have not done before? In my previous company, I was running the whole department on my own for a period of time too!
But then again, much as I care about my career, it is not the number one to me. I have no qualms giving up my career for my family if need be. So why do I keep getting happier and better on something which is second place to me (not that I do not welcome it), yet the thing that is first place to me, I can never achieve?
I keep being asked to wait. How long more must I wait? Some may label me as desperate, but if I am really desperate, I will not still be so picky. I will have grabbed anyone off the streets. Afterall, in general, men will welcome that. But I am not like that. I am not a loose person, nor someone devoid of values. If I do not like someone, no matter how nice he is to me, I will not accept him because that is being irresponsible on my part and unfair to him.
If I am a man, I will not care so much. I can settle down and father kids even in my fifties. But I am a woman, so things are very different. A woman only has that number of years to bear children. Once past those years, she will biologically be unable to have a child anymore, no matter how much she wants to. This is something men can never understand.
It is perfectly understandable and justifiable why women want to settle down and start a family once they reach a certain age. If the man they are with are not ready, then for their own sake, they should move on and be with someone who is ready and have the same goals. Blame it on the men if they are not able to hold on to the women they love! Why always blame the girl for being fickle and unfaithful?
Just another random raving and ranting. As I said, I have been moody. I am not expecting a fairy tale whatsoever, but as the years go by, and I am not getting any younger, I do wish I can find someone I am willing to carve a future with. I am happy being single, but at the same time, it is so much happier and blissful to have someone to do things together and share my life with. Somehow I feel that there is still something missing in my life, that my life is never complete until I have someone who completes me.
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