Another One Bites The Dust!

I really really seem to have lots of problems lately. First, my investment failed and I am still paying off debts. Second, things on the work front are brewing up one after another. Third, I got sabotaged like that. Fourth, well, that one I have not disclosed yet.

Yes, I know on the work front I gave an honest feedback and now people are not happy with the truth, so going all out for my blood. I do not care, I am just there to do my job. If people are not happy with me they let me know and we can thrash things out! But people, being people, will rather go through third or fourth parties to convey the message, and by the time the message actually comes to me (if that ever happens), everything is distorted.

What got me really upset was that now those whom I consider my friends and whom I used to lunch with, they got influenced by the gossip somehow and started boycotting me. Where they would use to go by my desk every lunch time and signal to me, now in order to totally avoid me, they just go out by the backdoor so they would not even go by my desk!

I am not that naïve to not know what is going on! If they no longer want to hang out or whatsoever, just let me know! Why do they have to go round in circles? I have no qualms lunching alone; I have been doing that since I joined the company. At least when I lunch alone I can go where I like to eat, enjoy some time to myself, read a book while eating.

I do not see why I have to get into a clique when I cannot relate to the people in there. Neither do I see the need to butter up to anyone. As long as I do my job that is all that matters. The office is not my home, my job is not my life. Why do I have to go around pretending to be who I am not? Is that not very hypocritical?

Now the worst news is that my current boss is leaving. Initially I thought it was because of me, as I know he offended some people while trying to protect me. Luckily those top management do not get embroiled in office politics as long as work is done. He spoke to me yesterday and told me that he is moving on for better pastures, and he wants me to be careful and watch my back.

At times I feel, what is the purpose of me staying? I do not mind my job, I like the learning experience, it is a good ground for knowledge. I need the money, at this point in time. And also, why should I cave in to those people who wish for me to leave?

What is it I am not used to? It is not as if it is the first time someone backstabbed me, I had lots of that during the years in government service. It is not as if I may end up with a bad boss, I have had bosses who totally pissed me off, who showed me no respect, who treated me like a slave or maid, who expected me to clean up for them. Which is why I am still not moving, until a newer and better opportunity is to come. Meanwhile I just need to face whatever it comes. Afterall, it is not as if I am not used to problems and challenges!