Going to Bar Celona yesterday reminded me of the first time I went there last year. I was supposed to go to Spain, so an ex-date brought me there to taste Spanish food before the trip. But then in the end we went to England at the last minute instead.
I still remember that day he hurt his foot while playing tennis a few days back. Yet, he walked with me after dinner through the stretch of Singapore River, all the way to Clarke Quay, before boarding a bus back with me, and then taking a bus back on his own.
Come to think of it, I have had sweet guys whom I really enjoyed their companies. Only thing is why do the sweet guys I meet lately all seem so non-committal? But sweet or not, a real good man is not how well he treats you when things are going well, but whether he is willing to accept your entire being and be by your side in the face of conflicts.
Which brought me back to something someone told me. I chat a lot online, and I am in some of those networking websites that are so prominent now. These portals are a way to keep in touch with friends and acquaintances, in light of our busy schedules.
To some people, they view these messenging services and networking sites as a portal to find a partner, and once they start seeing someone, they no longer go onto these sites. To each their own, but to me, these portals are the very places I can keep in touch and catch up with friends, whether I am attached or not.
Of course, there are some people I chat with more, and there are some I chat with less. There are some that are online everyday, and there are some that are seldom online (or perhaps I never have the luck to bump into them online).
Online chatting is a good way to network and know a person. But with the convenience of online chatting, one attracts more dubious characters. Strangers can just bump into you and ask all kinds of stupid questions, as if it is their right. Why must I entertain people whom I do not even know?
There are also those who message you so many times just because you do not respond after five minutes or so. Well, if I happen to be busy and away, or just not in the mood to chat, all those actions can be really irritating.
And there are also those who, after chatting for a while, suddenly claim they have feelings for me, and hope I will accept them. Erh, I do not even know what they look like in person! Even with pictures, how would I know how outdated the pictures are or if it is even the real pictures in the first place?
No doubt there are some who did manage to fall in love online. Maybe they do share a cyber connection. But just mere chatting online is not enough if one intends to develop a relationship, because one can be more objective and impersonal while chatting online since there is no pressure to impress compared to meeting up face to face.
One must meet up before things can really progress, as online chatting is just on the surface, very superficial. In fact, those guys I have been in relationships with, and those I have dated, we seldom chat online. Of course, in the early days, there is no such thing as online chatting until the late nineties or so. So before that, we survived on phone calls and meetups after school and weekends.
Even now with the convenience of online chatting where one can keep in touch with others almost all hours of the day, those whom I have dated would still call or message me, email me and ask me out if they intend to bring the friendship to a higher level.
Ironically, my closest friends are those that seldom chat online. And they are not in any of the networking sites either. My best friend, for instance. She has never been on any online chatting program, even when my ex and I started chatting online when the program first came out, instead of calling each other so frequently. We were trying to get her to sign up but she never did.
She is also not on any of the network websites that is so abundant nowadays. She says she has no time nor energy to do anything online at work or at home. So how do we keep in touch? Via emails, both at home and at work, messages, and phone calls.
The only times she actually went on to a website were the times when she was trying out some dating and friendship websites. And a good thing she did, otherwise she would never have found her husband.
It is possible to find love online. But when two persons like each other based on their online personas or chatting, the next step is to meet up and get to know each other face to face, and see if both can still enjoy each other's companies and relate with each other on an individual and deeper level, and not on a superficial level, because one can portray a farce behind the screen.
It is only by seeing the person for who he / she is that one can get to know the true person. Which is why I have never made up my mind about a person just by chatting online. I must meet up with him and see for myself the kind of person he is before I see if I like to progress further.
I still remember that day he hurt his foot while playing tennis a few days back. Yet, he walked with me after dinner through the stretch of Singapore River, all the way to Clarke Quay, before boarding a bus back with me, and then taking a bus back on his own.
Come to think of it, I have had sweet guys whom I really enjoyed their companies. Only thing is why do the sweet guys I meet lately all seem so non-committal? But sweet or not, a real good man is not how well he treats you when things are going well, but whether he is willing to accept your entire being and be by your side in the face of conflicts.
Which brought me back to something someone told me. I chat a lot online, and I am in some of those networking websites that are so prominent now. These portals are a way to keep in touch with friends and acquaintances, in light of our busy schedules.
To some people, they view these messenging services and networking sites as a portal to find a partner, and once they start seeing someone, they no longer go onto these sites. To each their own, but to me, these portals are the very places I can keep in touch and catch up with friends, whether I am attached or not.
Of course, there are some people I chat with more, and there are some I chat with less. There are some that are online everyday, and there are some that are seldom online (or perhaps I never have the luck to bump into them online).
Online chatting is a good way to network and know a person. But with the convenience of online chatting, one attracts more dubious characters. Strangers can just bump into you and ask all kinds of stupid questions, as if it is their right. Why must I entertain people whom I do not even know?
There are also those who message you so many times just because you do not respond after five minutes or so. Well, if I happen to be busy and away, or just not in the mood to chat, all those actions can be really irritating.
And there are also those who, after chatting for a while, suddenly claim they have feelings for me, and hope I will accept them. Erh, I do not even know what they look like in person! Even with pictures, how would I know how outdated the pictures are or if it is even the real pictures in the first place?
No doubt there are some who did manage to fall in love online. Maybe they do share a cyber connection. But just mere chatting online is not enough if one intends to develop a relationship, because one can be more objective and impersonal while chatting online since there is no pressure to impress compared to meeting up face to face.
One must meet up before things can really progress, as online chatting is just on the surface, very superficial. In fact, those guys I have been in relationships with, and those I have dated, we seldom chat online. Of course, in the early days, there is no such thing as online chatting until the late nineties or so. So before that, we survived on phone calls and meetups after school and weekends.
Even now with the convenience of online chatting where one can keep in touch with others almost all hours of the day, those whom I have dated would still call or message me, email me and ask me out if they intend to bring the friendship to a higher level.
Ironically, my closest friends are those that seldom chat online. And they are not in any of the networking sites either. My best friend, for instance. She has never been on any online chatting program, even when my ex and I started chatting online when the program first came out, instead of calling each other so frequently. We were trying to get her to sign up but she never did.
She is also not on any of the network websites that is so abundant nowadays. She says she has no time nor energy to do anything online at work or at home. So how do we keep in touch? Via emails, both at home and at work, messages, and phone calls.
The only times she actually went on to a website were the times when she was trying out some dating and friendship websites. And a good thing she did, otherwise she would never have found her husband.
It is possible to find love online. But when two persons like each other based on their online personas or chatting, the next step is to meet up and get to know each other face to face, and see if both can still enjoy each other's companies and relate with each other on an individual and deeper level, and not on a superficial level, because one can portray a farce behind the screen.
It is only by seeing the person for who he / she is that one can get to know the true person. Which is why I have never made up my mind about a person just by chatting online. I must meet up with him and see for myself the kind of person he is before I see if I like to progress further.
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