I did an experiment. I finally uploaded my photo onto the dating website I am on. And guess what? All of a sudden, I have an influx of people wanting to contact me and writing to me, when things have been stagnant for a few months!
Ever since I signed up to the website, I have never uploaded my photo. To me, I feel that one should not judge on just appearances alone, and besides, I am not that comfortable baring my photo to all and sundry when I do not even know anyone there. So I relied on my profile. This is something like dating agencies, where both get set up on blind dates with just their profiles and names and not what they look like.
Besides, I feel that if the guys are really interested to know me based on my profile alone, they will still contact me even without my photo. Thus, I never wanted to upload a photo. Things were quite good initially, because I did meet quite a number of interesting guys. Of course, there are still dubious guys who wanted to take a stab, but the couple of guys I have met and tried to progress with are really genuine and true and we really had great times. Even if nothing came out of it, I made a few close friends.
Lately, things were rather stagnated for the past few months. There were other contacts of course, but all were dubious characters who just wanted to try their luck in getting laid. There was one guy who wrote to me, and I replied, and he replied, then we migrated to chatting online. Yet recently he contacted me again, with the same introductory message. Seems like he wrote to everyone the same way. It gives me the impression he is just trying out his luck by stabbing in the dark.
Hmmm... does he not remember me or he just did not bother saving all those he had contacted? At least this person makes me realise that he is one I will not bother with, since we do not seem to be on the same level. It is trivial things like these that one can see one's character, because the real person will never be able to hide away. If the person is really serious, he will know who he has contacted and not just send out contacts in the dark like that, without even knowing if he has repeated contacts!
Then there was another guy whom I deemed his profile rather interesting, and I like the way he expresses himself. Another articulate person. So I dropped him a note. That was before I uploaded my photo. I saw that he had viewed me, but he did not reply to my message so I did not bother after that. Then when my photo was uploaded, he contacted me on his own initiative.
So what does that show? That people are still so shallow and that appearances do matter? I admit the photo I uploaded was a close-up one taken during my cousin's wedding last year, so I was quite dressed up and made up, and perhaps do look a little better than most days.
Which makes me worry whether people contact me because of what I write, or because of what I look like. If someone really has inner beauty and on the lookout for someone special in the hopes of developing a serious life-long relationship, looks really do not matter, is it not? It is the character and personality that matters, how compatible both are, how much in common they have.
Thus I am removing my photo and will never upload another one. If people still contact me and show interest despite not having a photo, then I believe these are the ones that are more worthy of my time, and not those who only go for what one looks like. A real genuine and true person will go beyond appearances to the inner core, and not focus on what is outside.
Ever since I signed up to the website, I have never uploaded my photo. To me, I feel that one should not judge on just appearances alone, and besides, I am not that comfortable baring my photo to all and sundry when I do not even know anyone there. So I relied on my profile. This is something like dating agencies, where both get set up on blind dates with just their profiles and names and not what they look like.
Besides, I feel that if the guys are really interested to know me based on my profile alone, they will still contact me even without my photo. Thus, I never wanted to upload a photo. Things were quite good initially, because I did meet quite a number of interesting guys. Of course, there are still dubious guys who wanted to take a stab, but the couple of guys I have met and tried to progress with are really genuine and true and we really had great times. Even if nothing came out of it, I made a few close friends.
Lately, things were rather stagnated for the past few months. There were other contacts of course, but all were dubious characters who just wanted to try their luck in getting laid. There was one guy who wrote to me, and I replied, and he replied, then we migrated to chatting online. Yet recently he contacted me again, with the same introductory message. Seems like he wrote to everyone the same way. It gives me the impression he is just trying out his luck by stabbing in the dark.
Hmmm... does he not remember me or he just did not bother saving all those he had contacted? At least this person makes me realise that he is one I will not bother with, since we do not seem to be on the same level. It is trivial things like these that one can see one's character, because the real person will never be able to hide away. If the person is really serious, he will know who he has contacted and not just send out contacts in the dark like that, without even knowing if he has repeated contacts!
Then there was another guy whom I deemed his profile rather interesting, and I like the way he expresses himself. Another articulate person. So I dropped him a note. That was before I uploaded my photo. I saw that he had viewed me, but he did not reply to my message so I did not bother after that. Then when my photo was uploaded, he contacted me on his own initiative.
So what does that show? That people are still so shallow and that appearances do matter? I admit the photo I uploaded was a close-up one taken during my cousin's wedding last year, so I was quite dressed up and made up, and perhaps do look a little better than most days.
Which makes me worry whether people contact me because of what I write, or because of what I look like. If someone really has inner beauty and on the lookout for someone special in the hopes of developing a serious life-long relationship, looks really do not matter, is it not? It is the character and personality that matters, how compatible both are, how much in common they have.
Thus I am removing my photo and will never upload another one. If people still contact me and show interest despite not having a photo, then I believe these are the ones that are more worthy of my time, and not those who only go for what one looks like. A real genuine and true person will go beyond appearances to the inner core, and not focus on what is outside.
0 comments:
Post a Comment