In recent years, I have started having a phobia of the above phrase. Normally, whenever someone says, "We need to talk", it normally bodes bad news, at least for me. After all, it is only because of unresolved problems that people want to talk. If things are going well, who will bother spending the time and energy talking things through?
Besides my mum, there have only been two others who have used that phrase on me, and whenever that happens, it is to talk about issues close to our hearts. Sometimes we would end up quarrelling, sometimes things would be resolved.
In the past couple of years, this phrase is synonymous with the end of a budding relationship. Thus, whenever someone potential tells me they need to talk, it is always the worst case scenario, and I get upset over false hopes and disappointments again.
So much so that lately, whenever I meet someone new, I get so wary and reserved. Not a healthy sign I know, but after having been disappointed so many times, now I tend to protect myself a bit and not hope for too much, as the bigger the hope, the greater the disappointment. I am no longer that young and have the energy to keep getting hurt.
In the past, I would avoid whenever someone told me they need to talk. In my younger and more carefree days, I thought the longer I avoided, things would just resolve by themselves. How naive and childish I was! To think of something so immature!
Thus now, especially in light of the past two years, I am more receptive whenever people tell me they need to talk. After all, if things are really not going well, it is better to nip them in the bud rather than avoiding and dragging on, is it not? Only a real (wo)man will face problems and difficulties head on, and try to resolve the issues, instead of keeping quiet, avoiding and then pull a disappearing act, taking it as if nothing happened.
I have learnt a few lessons through the years, and that is, in facing problems and confrontation, and resolving and letting go of difficult situations, can one truly grow. It is all part of growth, and one then gain more experiences and start becoming more objective in dealing with things, instead of being so emotional. So now I am all for talking, instead of avoiding!
Besides my mum, there have only been two others who have used that phrase on me, and whenever that happens, it is to talk about issues close to our hearts. Sometimes we would end up quarrelling, sometimes things would be resolved.
In the past couple of years, this phrase is synonymous with the end of a budding relationship. Thus, whenever someone potential tells me they need to talk, it is always the worst case scenario, and I get upset over false hopes and disappointments again.
So much so that lately, whenever I meet someone new, I get so wary and reserved. Not a healthy sign I know, but after having been disappointed so many times, now I tend to protect myself a bit and not hope for too much, as the bigger the hope, the greater the disappointment. I am no longer that young and have the energy to keep getting hurt.
In the past, I would avoid whenever someone told me they need to talk. In my younger and more carefree days, I thought the longer I avoided, things would just resolve by themselves. How naive and childish I was! To think of something so immature!
Thus now, especially in light of the past two years, I am more receptive whenever people tell me they need to talk. After all, if things are really not going well, it is better to nip them in the bud rather than avoiding and dragging on, is it not? Only a real (wo)man will face problems and difficulties head on, and try to resolve the issues, instead of keeping quiet, avoiding and then pull a disappearing act, taking it as if nothing happened.
I have learnt a few lessons through the years, and that is, in facing problems and confrontation, and resolving and letting go of difficult situations, can one truly grow. It is all part of growth, and one then gain more experiences and start becoming more objective in dealing with things, instead of being so emotional. So now I am all for talking, instead of avoiding!
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