I went for the birthday celebration of my maternal grandma on Sunday. My little nephew is growing up so well! He can walk so quickly and so articulate at such a young age! He can actually speak in complete sentences, instead of baby talk, and he sings and dances too! But then it is no surprise, considering his parents are effectively bilingual, one with a Masters, one pursuing a PhD, both sing and dance, and my cousin has a performance diploma in piano. So I will not be surprised if the boy turns out to be a genius.
Years ago, when our government advised men not to ostracise graduate women, there was some debate on why should the government control the kinds of people we socialise with? There were more graduates out there, with a vast number being women, and in those days, men were still reluctant to go out with someone smarter and more capable. Actually, some men are still like that - for some reason they cannot accept it if the lady is older or smarter or higher educated or more capable or have more earning power than them. On the other hand, not many women were able to accept that as well.
Nevertheless, the advise was not without justification. Our famous father of the country said to marry a wife equal or better, because the children will then take after both and be just as good or better. Even Hitler knew about this, as evidenced from his Nazi Aryan project, even though no one condoned his actions.
So ideally, the offspring of two very smart and capable parents will become just as smart and capable, if not better. To me, nature is not so much as nurture. There were experiements whether nature or nurture is better, and often than not, nurture plays a big part. One can be born smart, but if the full potential was not cultivated, chances are the kids end up just average. But if someone was not that smart but the parents took the trouble to groom him, then he can be pretty outstanding too.
By right, being the offspring of both Master degree holders, I should be smart and capable too, but I am neither. My parents tried to groom me as well, by giving me enrichment lessons and whatnot. They have done their part, but I guess I was not appreciative, thus blew my own chances of unleashing my full potential (if I have any in the first place).
Now seeing my nephew, I know that if I am to have kids, I will want to give them the best - grow up in the best environment, cultivate and groom them to be the best they can be, to be all-rounders, to give them a good foundation as they make their way in the world. I want them to grow up bilingual, articulate, intelligent, street smart and knowing how to handle things on their own, to be exposed and worldly, and not still be so naive and innocent even at the age of thirty.
Which is why I am not compromising on the kind of person I am looking for. Because I owe it to my future kids to have the best. The kind of parents somehow reflect the kind of children (not very true in my case actually, but I am somewhat like my mum even though not as capable as her), so I do not want my kids to take after me but someone better than me.
Years ago, when our government advised men not to ostracise graduate women, there was some debate on why should the government control the kinds of people we socialise with? There were more graduates out there, with a vast number being women, and in those days, men were still reluctant to go out with someone smarter and more capable. Actually, some men are still like that - for some reason they cannot accept it if the lady is older or smarter or higher educated or more capable or have more earning power than them. On the other hand, not many women were able to accept that as well.
Nevertheless, the advise was not without justification. Our famous father of the country said to marry a wife equal or better, because the children will then take after both and be just as good or better. Even Hitler knew about this, as evidenced from his Nazi Aryan project, even though no one condoned his actions.
So ideally, the offspring of two very smart and capable parents will become just as smart and capable, if not better. To me, nature is not so much as nurture. There were experiements whether nature or nurture is better, and often than not, nurture plays a big part. One can be born smart, but if the full potential was not cultivated, chances are the kids end up just average. But if someone was not that smart but the parents took the trouble to groom him, then he can be pretty outstanding too.
By right, being the offspring of both Master degree holders, I should be smart and capable too, but I am neither. My parents tried to groom me as well, by giving me enrichment lessons and whatnot. They have done their part, but I guess I was not appreciative, thus blew my own chances of unleashing my full potential (if I have any in the first place).
Now seeing my nephew, I know that if I am to have kids, I will want to give them the best - grow up in the best environment, cultivate and groom them to be the best they can be, to be all-rounders, to give them a good foundation as they make their way in the world. I want them to grow up bilingual, articulate, intelligent, street smart and knowing how to handle things on their own, to be exposed and worldly, and not still be so naive and innocent even at the age of thirty.
Which is why I am not compromising on the kind of person I am looking for. Because I owe it to my future kids to have the best. The kind of parents somehow reflect the kind of children (not very true in my case actually, but I am somewhat like my mum even though not as capable as her), so I do not want my kids to take after me but someone better than me.
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