Does love ends when a person dies? What do you do if your loved one dies? Do you hold on, keep the memories alive and never get over him / her, or do you let go and move on with your life? Will you feel devastated and lost for the rest of your life, or will you be happy and get on with life?
If you really love someone, his / her death will be a big blow to you. The pain of losing a loved one, knowing all the dreams of the future and things to come will never be fulfilled. How does one continue living? Perhaps they only survive and not really live.
How does Juliet feel when Romeo died in front of her? So devastated that she killed herself. How does Ophelia feel when Hamlet was slain? How does Cleopatra feel when Antony was killed? And how does Rose feel when Jack drowned?
Years ago, I feared my then-boyfriend would die in a plane crash during one of his flights. I remember feeling I would never be able to get on with my life if that really happened. Then when I was in such a messed-up state when he dumped me, I remember hoping he would really just die in a plane crash and release me from my misery. Pretty mean and evil of me, I know, and I am not proud that I even thought of that.
Perhaps I am just a sucker for sappy love stories, but in the books I have read and movies I have seen, when two lovers are to be separated due to death in whatever circumstances, the one who is dying will always tell the partner to go on with life.
Jack told Rose to live on, get married, have kids, grow old and die a happy old woman, and made her promise never to let go of this promise. She promised him not to let go, and watched him sink into the ocean before she got herself rescued. She continued living life to the fullest, getting her dreams fulfilled, got married, have kids and did die a happy old woman.
In "Winter Sonata", JS had to go for an operation which might cost him his life, and told his brother XH to take care of his love YJ. He told YJ to forget about him and go on with her life, continue to fulfil her dreams, which she did.
In the Japanese movie "Crying Out Love At The Centre Of The World", Aki's last message to Saku was to scatter her ashes in the Australian desert, then go on with his life, get a good job and settle down.
So if our loved one dies, perhaps we should just move on and be happy. It will probably be what the late love wanted of us. Will he / she rest in peace if we never let go of the past and blow our chances at happiness again?
Of course, ideally, girls will want guys to be like Heathcliff in "Wuthering Heights", where he remained faithful to his true love Catherine even after she died. But he became a ghost of a man, just continue living day after day without really living.
If I am dying, I will want my loved one to go on with his life. It will be sweet to hold on to me, to my memory, but I would not wish him to waste his life away just like that. I would want him to find a new love and have another chance at happiness, the love and happiness which I would never ever be able to provide.
But what would I do if my loved one dies? Honestly, I do not know. I believe it is possible to love a person for eternity. Perhaps I may just love him, and keep his memory alive for life, or perhaps I may settle down with someone else if I can ever find one who can trigger off strong feelings in me again. Or perhaps I may even do a Juliet and be buried together with him.
If you really love someone, his / her death will be a big blow to you. The pain of losing a loved one, knowing all the dreams of the future and things to come will never be fulfilled. How does one continue living? Perhaps they only survive and not really live.
How does Juliet feel when Romeo died in front of her? So devastated that she killed herself. How does Ophelia feel when Hamlet was slain? How does Cleopatra feel when Antony was killed? And how does Rose feel when Jack drowned?
Years ago, I feared my then-boyfriend would die in a plane crash during one of his flights. I remember feeling I would never be able to get on with my life if that really happened. Then when I was in such a messed-up state when he dumped me, I remember hoping he would really just die in a plane crash and release me from my misery. Pretty mean and evil of me, I know, and I am not proud that I even thought of that.
Perhaps I am just a sucker for sappy love stories, but in the books I have read and movies I have seen, when two lovers are to be separated due to death in whatever circumstances, the one who is dying will always tell the partner to go on with life.
Jack told Rose to live on, get married, have kids, grow old and die a happy old woman, and made her promise never to let go of this promise. She promised him not to let go, and watched him sink into the ocean before she got herself rescued. She continued living life to the fullest, getting her dreams fulfilled, got married, have kids and did die a happy old woman.
In "Winter Sonata", JS had to go for an operation which might cost him his life, and told his brother XH to take care of his love YJ. He told YJ to forget about him and go on with her life, continue to fulfil her dreams, which she did.
In the Japanese movie "Crying Out Love At The Centre Of The World", Aki's last message to Saku was to scatter her ashes in the Australian desert, then go on with his life, get a good job and settle down.
So if our loved one dies, perhaps we should just move on and be happy. It will probably be what the late love wanted of us. Will he / she rest in peace if we never let go of the past and blow our chances at happiness again?
Of course, ideally, girls will want guys to be like Heathcliff in "Wuthering Heights", where he remained faithful to his true love Catherine even after she died. But he became a ghost of a man, just continue living day after day without really living.
If I am dying, I will want my loved one to go on with his life. It will be sweet to hold on to me, to my memory, but I would not wish him to waste his life away just like that. I would want him to find a new love and have another chance at happiness, the love and happiness which I would never ever be able to provide.
But what would I do if my loved one dies? Honestly, I do not know. I believe it is possible to love a person for eternity. Perhaps I may just love him, and keep his memory alive for life, or perhaps I may settle down with someone else if I can ever find one who can trigger off strong feelings in me again. Or perhaps I may even do a Juliet and be buried together with him.
3 comments:
Love does not die.
However, death releases us from our commitment to a loved one.
People often say love fades or dies, the truth is, there was no love to begin with.
People often confuse limerance with love.
i'm not going to think about what i'll do then. i believe i'll make a choice then.
i concentrate on what i can do now to tell him i love him and make him feel loved. so that there'll be minimal regrets and guilt should the day come when we part.
Richard : I agree. If you really love the person, it will not die just because he / she is gone.
Imp : Very true! No use regretting what you have not done when the person is already dead. Love should be shown when he / she is still around.
Post a Comment