Lilypie

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Finding An Exclusive Match

I went for two interviews at Lunch Actually and Exclusive Match, the former on Thursday evening after work and the latter this morning. Two years ago, when I went to try out Lunch Actually, the consultant said no one in their database matched the type I like. This time round, I was told they should be able to match some, albeit not a perfect match.

As I said, I am not looking for a perfect match. Just someone with a good character, shares my interests and values, and well brought-up with none of the vices. A little bit of flaw here and there does not matter as long as it is not too major. Just someone I feel proud and happy to carve a future with.

Lunch Actually gives twelve dates, with one more trial date, making it a total of thirteen dates, for three years. If in the event I do find someone within the first few dates, I can have my membership suspended and then get a refund for the remaining if all goes well after that.

Exclusive Match is a little different. It is a matchmaking agency, not a dating agency. The couple who runs it are certified relationship and marriage counsellors. They run relationship coachings, marriage preparation courses, as well as solemnisation of marriages. And they try their best to find the most perfect match.

They do not guarantee that we must have a certain number of dates within a certain time. Rather, they believe in matching with the most compatible, so the maximum number of times they give is six (some more, on case to case). On the average, most are able to find someone within the third or fourth match; some after the first even.

Some may view people who go for matchmaking or dating agencies as desperate, but as the years go by, and one's social circle becomes smaller and smaller (ie not that many singles out there anymore), sometimes one will go for other avenues to find a potential mate.

Of course, I am not saying that the first person one meets will be the one you think of marrying. And I am not saying that one must get married to survive. It all depends on the individual. But the fact is that for me, I want to get married, only once, settle down, have a family of my own. It is such a good feeling to be domesticated and have my own family.

But that is not going to happen if I just sit around and not do anything about it, especially since most of my friends are attached or married, and whatever single guys I know now are those that can never progress beyond friendship, even close friendship.

So, in order to reach my ultimate goal, I have to go beyond my own (and my friends') social circles and get to know more people. There is never any harm making new friends. And I mean decent people, where the dating agencies can offer to a certain extent, and not abnormal people whom one tends to meet online.

Even if at the end of it all, nothing comes out of anything, still, I would have made some new friends. At least I can look back without any regrets that I have tried, but not successful, so be it. One never knows the type of gems one can meet if one never tries. And friends are important because humans are social animals after all. One can never know who will be the one to count on in the hour of need.

Come to think of it, from the database in the dating and matchmaking agencies, there are still many people around who are like-minded, ie looking for someone to be with, for people to make friends with, people they can never meet in their own respective social circles. And being around like-minded people is a better thing, as things get easier if one treads on common ground with people of similar goals.

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