I knew this is going to be a bad week. I have yet another bad day. I initially started off in a pretty fine mood until something happened at work and I got so irritated and my mood just started going downhill from there.
I was so quiet on my way back that I daresay my darling was wondering what happened. Actually I wanted to just hug him and cry, wanted his company, wanted to talk and bitch, but since he already skipped his jogging routine for me last night, I was reluctant to ask him to skip his routine again today.
I feel so useless. I cannot seem to achieve any success in what I do. There are people with looks, brains, personality, capability, property, wheels, family and investments to last them for a life time. What do I have?
Nothing! Looks wise, nothing to speak of. Personality wise, I am a whiner, I complain too much, I am self-centred and think only of myself. Brains, nothing to mention there as well. Capability, also nothing there.
I have yet to own any property or wheels or have lots of investment, but these are immaterial actually. Family wise, how I wish I grew up in a happier family. I see my friends who are already married with kids, and I yearn so much to be the same, happily married with kids.
The average marrying age for a local female is 27, male is 30. I am already above that, yet my status is still legally single. Yes, I am in a happy and wonderful relationship, but I have learnt from previous experience that nothing becomes really secure or official until one is legally married.
As if that is not enough, I met another wolf today. These guys are getting bolder and bolder! I was just walking home and thinking to myself and trying to remember if I still have any Kit-Kats left at home to get over my depression, when this guy on a motorbike just whizzed by.
At first it was nothing, but he suddenly leaned over and brushed his lips across my cheek! I was too shocked to react and he scooted off before I could even get a look at his face. In any case, I was so depressed that I was not even in the mood to feel irritated or angry!
I never know anyone can be daring enough to kiss someone in broad daylight (okay, evening twilight) just like that! A pity I did not catch his face or his bike number, otherwise I would have lodged a report immediately!
I am really tired. Tired from the stress at work, tired from the insecurity that the relationship may not last again, tired from having to fend off all these perverts lately, tired mostly from outbursts of uncontrolled emotions.
In case any of you are wondering, I am still in a happy relationship, we have not quarrelled or anything. I guess I am just in an extra clingy and needy mood from being so depressed over my work and health problems. And it sucks to have to face the rest of the day by yourself when one is in such a mood.
I was so quiet on my way back that I daresay my darling was wondering what happened. Actually I wanted to just hug him and cry, wanted his company, wanted to talk and bitch, but since he already skipped his jogging routine for me last night, I was reluctant to ask him to skip his routine again today.
I feel so useless. I cannot seem to achieve any success in what I do. There are people with looks, brains, personality, capability, property, wheels, family and investments to last them for a life time. What do I have?
Nothing! Looks wise, nothing to speak of. Personality wise, I am a whiner, I complain too much, I am self-centred and think only of myself. Brains, nothing to mention there as well. Capability, also nothing there.
I have yet to own any property or wheels or have lots of investment, but these are immaterial actually. Family wise, how I wish I grew up in a happier family. I see my friends who are already married with kids, and I yearn so much to be the same, happily married with kids.
The average marrying age for a local female is 27, male is 30. I am already above that, yet my status is still legally single. Yes, I am in a happy and wonderful relationship, but I have learnt from previous experience that nothing becomes really secure or official until one is legally married.
As if that is not enough, I met another wolf today. These guys are getting bolder and bolder! I was just walking home and thinking to myself and trying to remember if I still have any Kit-Kats left at home to get over my depression, when this guy on a motorbike just whizzed by.
At first it was nothing, but he suddenly leaned over and brushed his lips across my cheek! I was too shocked to react and he scooted off before I could even get a look at his face. In any case, I was so depressed that I was not even in the mood to feel irritated or angry!
I never know anyone can be daring enough to kiss someone in broad daylight (okay, evening twilight) just like that! A pity I did not catch his face or his bike number, otherwise I would have lodged a report immediately!
I am really tired. Tired from the stress at work, tired from the insecurity that the relationship may not last again, tired from having to fend off all these perverts lately, tired mostly from outbursts of uncontrolled emotions.
In case any of you are wondering, I am still in a happy relationship, we have not quarrelled or anything. I guess I am just in an extra clingy and needy mood from being so depressed over my work and health problems. And it sucks to have to face the rest of the day by yourself when one is in such a mood.
0 comments:
Post a Comment