Lilypie

Monday, March 20, 2006

Phone Phobia?

Is there such a thing as phone phobia? According to "The Teenage Textbook", there is such a thing, and there is even a word for it - ringringhellophobia, obviously a word created by the author himself.

I remember when the telephone used to be the main mode of communication, before the e-mail or mobile came out. When I entered a relationship, I was on the phone most of the time. Or rather, he kept me on the phone, as he could talk to me (not a conversation, a monologue) from 4:00pm to 7:30pm, break for dinner, then again from 8:30pm to 1:00am in the morning.

After a few weeks, my mum was so fed up that she unplugged the phone outside my room. Since then, I never had a phone outside my room ever again. Since I was never allowed to have a phone (or a television) in my room, I had to make do with one outside, but even that was gone.

So whenever he called, I had to go down to the living room to pick up the phone. As usual, he would carry on his monologue for hours. I could not go or get a word in until he finished what he had to say, and often than not, I was at the end of his speech where he would criticise me on something or another.

So in the end, my mum removed the phone in the living room too. Thus, whenever we needed to make a call, we had to go through her first as only the phone in her room was still intact. But after my dad complained of the inconvenience, she put back the phone in the living room, but not the one outside my room. :-(

When the relationship ended, after the initial messed up period, I was so relieved that I did not have to subject my ears to such torture ever again! For a while, things got back to normal. I used the phone just as often to call my friends and chat.

My second ex did not really like using the phone, as he said he would rather talk to me face to face. Until after I grumbled that he never called me, he started calling me, and our phone conversations ranged from a half hour to an hour everyday.

Still, my mum was unhappy at my phone usage, and kept telling me not to hog the phone. So when I finally got my mobile, he and I could then communicate through my mobile and I seldom utilise my house phone ever since then. In fact, the only people who still call me through my house phone are my relatives and my best friend.

My third ex used to message me a lot, until he incurred a hefty bill, so since then, started calling me more often on the phone. But I grew to hate talking on the phone with him as he would always play a fool and got me irritated, then we would end up screaming at each other over the phone.

Through the years however, especially since now there are other modes of communication like messaging, online chatting, e-mailing, I started talking on the phone lesser and lesser. Also I guess after the teenage stage, somehow you just do not feel like talking so much on the phone anymore.

A friend told me that when he was younger, he would also carry on long conversations over the phone with his friends. They would chat the whole night through, talking about movies, latest gossips, etc. But once he was over the stage, he never liked to use the phone anymore. Even at work, he never used the phone unless absolutely urgent.

Lucky him! How I wish sometimes I need not use my phone at work too, but rude people just like to call and hound me. All the companies I have worked in, this is the only place where callers do not know how to be nice when they call in.

I guess everyone will go through the stage where they talk so much on the phone, and after that, they do not seem to like talking on the phone anymore. If you ask me now, although I would still like my guy to call me every now and then, but then I am also fine with messaging and online chatting.

And sometimes, I think that is a better way to communicate, especially for some people who may not be able to express themselves well enough verbally, but yet able to express themselves so well through messaging.

The Lifestyle paper today brought up that perhaps men are not comfortable in expressing themselves verbally, so they prefer to type in order to get their proper thoughts and messages across.

A friend mentioned to me once that guys can be too shy to tell girls certain things whenever they see them, whereas messaging was easier as they could just type and press. I guess as long as one is happy, that does not matter to me.

2 comments:

Ole' Wolvie said...

Hmm... I am a phone idiot too then.

shakespeareheroine said...

YOu are?? As in you do not talk on the phone, or do not know what to say?

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