There can never be enough coincidences. I saw two people whom I wish never to see again while buying dinner last night. I was trying to see if I could squirm out of an embarrassing situation when the lady came and talked to me.
At first, she asked if I would be attending their wedding. Funny question, considering I have not even had any details of their wedding date and venue. Then, she asked whether I would be interested in helping out at their wedding.
He must have let slip to her that I have been helping out at my cousins' and friends' weddings since young. Still, I was rather bemused at her question. My jaw almost dropped when I heard that. Is she serious?!
She must have seen my expression, because she quickly explained that they have no ulterior motives in asking me to help out at their wedding. But seeing that I look older (DO I REALLY?!) each time she sees me (as if she had seen me that many times), she thinks I should plan her wedding.
Her exact words were : Someone like me who is neither sexy nor gorgeous, will never be able to hold on to any guy for long, as guys want someone gorgeous whom they can show off, and not someone who shows signs of aging.
Thus, I will never be able to have my own wedding, so she is helping me make my dream come true by asking me to help prepare a dream wedding for them.
Talk about adding insult to injury! Adding salt to the wound! I have never been so humiliated in my life before! I was just so speechless with rage that I had no idea how to respond. And he just stood there and smiled without saying anything! But then again, what was I expecting him to say anyway?
I told them I had to rush so excused myself. But the damage was done. On my way home, I almost cried. No doubt I felt awkward seeing them, but actually it did not matter so much to me than what she said.
I keep telling myself to forgive and forget, that it is wrong to resent and be bitter, that hating someone is a sin, but when something like this happens, I just cannot help it. I was so angry I felt like strangling, murdering, voodooing.... anything if I could just erase my memory of this part of my life.
But what she said made me depressed. Is outer beauty really what counts? Is the one who is always so nice and giving always lose out just because she is plainer-looking, and the one who can give herself airs and so demanding get all the love just because she is too pretty to be let go off?
I did not wish to tell my guy what happened since he too was in a depressed state lately, but in the end I could not help it. I needed to get it off my chest, so I told him. And he comforted me (although I should be the one comforting him). He told me not to bother what others say as long as I have him and he loves me.
Now is that not just so sweet? That lifted my spirits up. I must remember what I promise myself - to resolve to be happy, especially with my sweet dear, and not let anything affect my mood.
Meanwhile, I have to see how to get rid of this bitterness in my mind. Perhaps I need a ritual cleansing of the soul before I can find peace.
At first, she asked if I would be attending their wedding. Funny question, considering I have not even had any details of their wedding date and venue. Then, she asked whether I would be interested in helping out at their wedding.
He must have let slip to her that I have been helping out at my cousins' and friends' weddings since young. Still, I was rather bemused at her question. My jaw almost dropped when I heard that. Is she serious?!
She must have seen my expression, because she quickly explained that they have no ulterior motives in asking me to help out at their wedding. But seeing that I look older (DO I REALLY?!) each time she sees me (as if she had seen me that many times), she thinks I should plan her wedding.
Her exact words were : Someone like me who is neither sexy nor gorgeous, will never be able to hold on to any guy for long, as guys want someone gorgeous whom they can show off, and not someone who shows signs of aging.
Thus, I will never be able to have my own wedding, so she is helping me make my dream come true by asking me to help prepare a dream wedding for them.
Talk about adding insult to injury! Adding salt to the wound! I have never been so humiliated in my life before! I was just so speechless with rage that I had no idea how to respond. And he just stood there and smiled without saying anything! But then again, what was I expecting him to say anyway?
I told them I had to rush so excused myself. But the damage was done. On my way home, I almost cried. No doubt I felt awkward seeing them, but actually it did not matter so much to me than what she said.
I keep telling myself to forgive and forget, that it is wrong to resent and be bitter, that hating someone is a sin, but when something like this happens, I just cannot help it. I was so angry I felt like strangling, murdering, voodooing.... anything if I could just erase my memory of this part of my life.
But what she said made me depressed. Is outer beauty really what counts? Is the one who is always so nice and giving always lose out just because she is plainer-looking, and the one who can give herself airs and so demanding get all the love just because she is too pretty to be let go off?
I did not wish to tell my guy what happened since he too was in a depressed state lately, but in the end I could not help it. I needed to get it off my chest, so I told him. And he comforted me (although I should be the one comforting him). He told me not to bother what others say as long as I have him and he loves me.
Now is that not just so sweet? That lifted my spirits up. I must remember what I promise myself - to resolve to be happy, especially with my sweet dear, and not let anything affect my mood.
Meanwhile, I have to see how to get rid of this bitterness in my mind. Perhaps I need a ritual cleansing of the soul before I can find peace.
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