My brother told me that the holiday plans have gone to naught, as my mum complained that it is too expensive to go anywhere around the December period. I told him it is not that unexpected (knowing my mum), so he should never have gotten his hopes up so high in the first place.
I was blog-surfing when I came across a post with a rather interesting content. The gist of it was on how pornography to guys is like shopping to girls – cannot live without it, but it is a bad habit all the same.
I know for a fact that all my three previous guys and even my brothers surfed / downloaded / bought porn. They never told me, but left tell-tale signs around which I stumbled upon, just that I chose to shut my eyes to those. When I casually brought up this topic once, one of my exs told me that girls can be turned on through words and speech, but guys are more visual, so they have to see naked bodies and people doing the act before they can be turned on and start self-indulging.
Since we Venusians are created and function differently from the Martians, I am in no position to comment on this issue. But I know for a fact that there are girls who enjoy porn too, either by themselves or with their loved ones. And yes, girls do have erotic dreams and touch themselves as well, but unlike guys who can be most satisfied only by the physical act, girls can be more satisfied while playing with sex toys. (Note to reader : I am NOT speaking from experience!)
But generally, girls will wonder what it is about porn that is so fascinating to guys? Afterall, the people involved are also humans, and they have the same things everyone has. Will girls get upset that their guys prefer jerking off to some images on screen than doing the actual thing with them? And if guys do this for satisfaction, won’t the actual act with a loved one bring more satisfaction?
If the guy is religious, will it not be a sin if he indulges in porn and self-satisfaction? But I always thought it is a grey area. All my years of catechism classes and now RCIA, I have only been told that pre-marital sex and adultery are sins. There does not seem to be any mention of pornography or masturbation. So since it is self-satisfaction, in what way is that a real sin?
And what if the guy is married? Will it be right to do the same? How will the wife feel? Personally I think I will feel rather insulted. It will be as if he is downright implying that I cannot do anything well for him or I am not good enough so he needs other channels like looking at other naked girls to satisfy himself. But if doing that is just foreplay for something much better, then I do not see a reason to disallow.
I really salute this particular blogger for deleting all the millions of porn in his system just because he is getting married. This shows a guy really willing to go all out to be faithful to the wife, which includes no more porn surfing or looking at other women. I seriously wonder how many guys can actually do that.
But since it is in a guy’s nature to surf porn, then to accept a guy, does it mean that we have to accept this habit of his? On the other hand, if guys are able to accept girls being shopaholics or on good terms with other guys and even ogling at movie hunks, will it be unfair if we expect guys to give up their porn? If we girls ogle at buffy muscular half-naked guys, then it is of course even more natural for guys to do the same, ie ogle at gorgeous girls, not guys.
I know I get excited whenever I see Legolas or Brad Pitt or BYJ, and even more so if they are topless. My exs used to just ignore all my little outbursts whenever I see any of my idols on screen.
Perhaps we are brought up in this conservative society to frown upon pornography and sex, since these are considered taboo subjects. But come to think of it, are not married couples (and some not married) doing about the same things, and maybe more? Only now with technological and media advances, these images can be brought on screen. So why is it such a big deal for guys to surf porn, especially if he is single and wants an avenue to curb his raging hormones?
I was blog-surfing when I came across a post with a rather interesting content. The gist of it was on how pornography to guys is like shopping to girls – cannot live without it, but it is a bad habit all the same.
I know for a fact that all my three previous guys and even my brothers surfed / downloaded / bought porn. They never told me, but left tell-tale signs around which I stumbled upon, just that I chose to shut my eyes to those. When I casually brought up this topic once, one of my exs told me that girls can be turned on through words and speech, but guys are more visual, so they have to see naked bodies and people doing the act before they can be turned on and start self-indulging.
Since we Venusians are created and function differently from the Martians, I am in no position to comment on this issue. But I know for a fact that there are girls who enjoy porn too, either by themselves or with their loved ones. And yes, girls do have erotic dreams and touch themselves as well, but unlike guys who can be most satisfied only by the physical act, girls can be more satisfied while playing with sex toys. (Note to reader : I am NOT speaking from experience!)
But generally, girls will wonder what it is about porn that is so fascinating to guys? Afterall, the people involved are also humans, and they have the same things everyone has. Will girls get upset that their guys prefer jerking off to some images on screen than doing the actual thing with them? And if guys do this for satisfaction, won’t the actual act with a loved one bring more satisfaction?
If the guy is religious, will it not be a sin if he indulges in porn and self-satisfaction? But I always thought it is a grey area. All my years of catechism classes and now RCIA, I have only been told that pre-marital sex and adultery are sins. There does not seem to be any mention of pornography or masturbation. So since it is self-satisfaction, in what way is that a real sin?
And what if the guy is married? Will it be right to do the same? How will the wife feel? Personally I think I will feel rather insulted. It will be as if he is downright implying that I cannot do anything well for him or I am not good enough so he needs other channels like looking at other naked girls to satisfy himself. But if doing that is just foreplay for something much better, then I do not see a reason to disallow.
I really salute this particular blogger for deleting all the millions of porn in his system just because he is getting married. This shows a guy really willing to go all out to be faithful to the wife, which includes no more porn surfing or looking at other women. I seriously wonder how many guys can actually do that.
But since it is in a guy’s nature to surf porn, then to accept a guy, does it mean that we have to accept this habit of his? On the other hand, if guys are able to accept girls being shopaholics or on good terms with other guys and even ogling at movie hunks, will it be unfair if we expect guys to give up their porn? If we girls ogle at buffy muscular half-naked guys, then it is of course even more natural for guys to do the same, ie ogle at gorgeous girls, not guys.
I know I get excited whenever I see Legolas or Brad Pitt or BYJ, and even more so if they are topless. My exs used to just ignore all my little outbursts whenever I see any of my idols on screen.
Perhaps we are brought up in this conservative society to frown upon pornography and sex, since these are considered taboo subjects. But come to think of it, are not married couples (and some not married) doing about the same things, and maybe more? Only now with technological and media advances, these images can be brought on screen. So why is it such a big deal for guys to surf porn, especially if he is single and wants an avenue to curb his raging hormones?
2 comments:
I have lived in Japan, and they are more open there regarding this (although with specific restrictions of their own).
Once I got used to it being so prevalent (compared to in Singapore), a good manga will catch my interest much much better than bared flesh on paper.
I guess 'being forbidden' is part of the allure. Humans are strange like that.
Yes, I know about Japan, cos most of the porn flicks came from there (I think). Even in certain comics there are more "nudity".
Like what you said, perhaps it is taboo, that's why it's so appealing.
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