Lilypie

Sunday, November 6, 2005

Things People Ask .....

Sometimes people just choose to ask the most stupid obvious questions. Lately when I meet new people, they will always ask if I am single, to which I will answer in the affirmative. Then the next question will be whether I am getting married. Erm.... did I not just say I am single? Or do I have to explain that I am single, available, still looking for a good guy, and if he only wants a fling get out of my sight?

I have been quoting the wedding vows from "Corpse Bride" in my instant messaging display name. I have been quoting line by line for the past few weeks. Just when few days ago, I quoted the last line ("With this ring, I ask you to be mine"), suddenly some of my friends ask me if I am getting married. I have been using the quote for the past few weeks, do they not make the connection even if they did not watch the show? And I did quote the entire thing in my post after watching the show!

So I said how can I be getting married when I am still lacking of a partner? To which they said perhaps it was a sudden impulse and I am keeping everything secretive? Oh please, in the first place, it is highly unlikely I will get attached anytime soon; in the second place, even if by some miracle I get attached now, it will be at least a year or so before I think of getting married; and in the third place, if I am to get married, it will never be a secret because I will declare.

At times I wish I can be like Chandler, to counter an obvious question with sarcasm and irony. But that can be very offensive, so I have never tried that out. Besides, I am not as witty as some others I know. I just have to constantly remind myself not to make the same mistake.

But these are just little trivial matters. What happens if people ask you things which you are in a dilemma whether to answer? Like back in school, my first ex asked if I could be his girlfriend, because the few girls he went after rejected him. I was too blinded to notice, but upon looking back, was I just a backup then? What happens if a guy (or girl) you sort of liked got close to you, just to find out more about your best friend? In this situation, should you be a good friend and try to get the two of them together, or be a bitch (or bastard) and sabotage everything?

All through school, I have had at least three guys who got close to me just because they wanted me to put in a good word for them to my best friend. But she was attached at that point in time, so I just told them the truth. And they thought I did not want to help them. Until they actually saw her and her boyfriend together before they realised I was telling the truth.

Even now when we have all left school, there are guys whom I know asking me to set up a match for them with her. I have no problems with that, except she is the type whom once she likes a guy, she will go all out to keep him, no matter how much she had to do, and once she had no feeling for the guy, she would not even give him the time of the day. Sounds like me, actually.

So on one hand, I was asked to bring her out along when I meet my friend(s), but on the other hand, she told me specifically which of my friends she did not wish to meet (and it just happened to be those who wanted to meet her). I hate these sticky situations where I am literally caught in the middle.

My ex once asked me why is she so much more popular? So I said why not? She is the pretty one, fair-skinned, a bit Japanese-looking, better figure, can cook and do housework, and really goes all out for the guy she loves. He asked whether I ever found it unfair because no one has ever approached her asking to know me. Why would it be unfair? She deserves to be happy, and if she has so many suitors, it is all the more better for her! I know what I look like, thus I will never expect people asking to know me.

My ex initially went after her before we got together, but she turned him down as she felt no chemistry. He kept asking me to bring her out whenever we had an outing, and since we all lived around the same area, he escorted me home just to be close to her. In fact, there was once he asked her out during the National Day holiday, but she purposely sent me in her place.

So I never did find out was that did she turn him down because of me? When he told me he wanted to ask her to be his girlfriend, I was really hurting inside, because all along I thought he was after me. Probably I misread his signals. So he asked me to ask her, but I told him it was best to tell her himself.

I did sound her out regarding this issue, but she told me that firstly, she felt no chemistry with him; secondly, she found him too pompous and egotistical for her liking; and thirdly, she was already starting to like that guy who would be her boyfriend. When my ex finally asked her, she turned him down of course, after which he asked me. Perhaps I should have turned him down as well. I did not know if I was really just a backup or he was using me as a rebound, or did he ever loved me at all when he asked me?

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