Lilypie

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Love In The Time Of Disaster

The recent big earthquake brought about quite a number of touching stories in the background. Enough to formulate some ideas for a novel, something like during the Bosnia and Serbia split some years back. Imagine the setting of the story against the backdrop of a natural disaster or a country torn apart by civil war. The end product will be really touching indeed!

Apparently the rescue workers found a couple whose bodies were stuck together. When the quake occurred, a large stone came crashing down into their house. The man put himself between the boulder and the woman. He got his back crushed by the boulder, crushing the woman in the process. So both died together.

At times like these, it is really the test of true love. Imagine the ground started shaking all of a sudden, the big boulder just came crashing in, I believe the man had no time to even think, yet he did his utmost to protect the woman he loved. These are from instincts.

This somehow reminds me of a story I read. This guy A had been in love with this girl for six years, always devoted, putting her interests first, but for some reason she did not love him as deeply as she felt him too boring. Then he introduced his best friend B to her, a rebel and someone exciting, and she fell immediately for him at first sight. He responded to her love too.

One day, the building she was staying in caught fire. She was out then, but when she saw the fire, she quickly ran towards the building. She was with guy B then and he held her back, remarking that she was crazy to even think of running towards the fire, but she said she had an elderly neighbour who could hardly move around so she wanted to see how to get her out.

When they got to the building, it was almost in ruins. Guy B wanted to run off, as far away from the fire as possible, but she saw her neighbour being stuck behind the bed. So she begged him to save the old lady, yet he refused. He only relented reluctantly after she attempted to run into the ruined building to save the old lady.

So he went in to save the old lady half-heartedly, but the fire had consumed almost all the building, so he almost could not get her out. At that moment, Guy A came rushing up to her, saying the moment he heard of the fire, he rushed there immediately. She said Guy B was inside, and Guy A then rushed in without thinking. She held him back, but he said, "The man you love is inside. I will ensure he gets out safely." Now, that was so touching!

So Guy A rushed into the burning building, and he managed to save the old lady, then he rushed back in to save Guy B. Both managed to get out unscathed, albeit their faces black with the flames and soot. When they came out, all Guy B reacted was people better reward him for his efforts, but all Guy A did was ensure that everyone was alright, and went around helping those who were injured in the fire.

So the lady finally came to her senses. Guy A loved her so much that he was willing to sacrifice his own life just to save the one she loved, and even then, he never once blamed her for spurning his advances. Guy B claimed he loved her, but actually he was nothing but a coward. In the end, she dumped Guy B and married Guy A.

Okay, I am a sucker for love stories, but things like these do happen in real life, as evidenced from how the husband protected the wife in the face of the earthquake. Only someone who truly loves another will sacrifice him / herself for the one he / she loves in the face of the greatest danger, without thinking. It will be done instantaneously just like that. Those whose reactions are to save themselves first in the face of adversity or had to even think of how to react are those who probably do not love the partner that much in the first place.

Growing up, I witnessed my parents' little acts of love and devotion to each other. Their marriage is not smooth sailing all the time. They have their own shares of ups and downs, their own sets of problems, their quarrels and frustrations with each other, just like any normal couple.

When my dad was doing his Masters, my mum made sure his flask of water and tea, his box of stationery and foolscap paper would always be on his desk every night without fail. She would supervise my homework in my room, read a story to me before I sleep and made sure I sleep and not disturb my dad before going back to her room.

When it was my mum's turn to do her Masters, my dad helped her type her research and compile her assignments together (with help from me too!). This morning, when I joined my parents for breakfast, my dad asked me what I would like to order without asking my mum, because he knows exactly what my mum wants and how she likes the food.

It is little gestures like these that shows one's devotion to someone else. That is how a relationship and marriage can withstand the test of time, because despite all the differences, quarrels, frustrations and arguments, both still find time to do things for each other, to keep their companionship and commitment going.

Thus, it is really true that a wedding is but one day, but a marriage is for a lifetime. A lot of my friends, when they got married, they started planning on how big they wanted the wedding to be. They wanted the best in everything, no matter even if their budgets have been blown, ensured everything run smoothly.

At times, I feel that some of them are too obsessed with the idea of getting married and having a beautiful wedding, than the whole concept of marriage itself. For me, I want a marriage, not a wedding. Of course, a traditional wedding with church and reception is a must, but it does not need to be such a big bash or have such an extraordinary theme to make it so special. A simple wedding can be special too, as long as the couple love each other with all their hearts and willing to commit and devote the rest of their lives to each other.

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