In our local context, whenever someone has a doctorate degree or going to pursue doctorate, somehow he / she will always be teased to remain grounded and not get permanent head damage from all the studying. After all, that is what a PhD stands for. :-p This is in relation to those who have too much intellectual power and in the end gets too stressed from studying too much, thus starts behaving in a really weird way.
Of course not everyone is like that. My cousin-in-law is pursuing a doctorate degree, and he is a very normal, decent, nice guy with absolutely no airs. But the same cannot be said about another person I came across, who really justifies a "Permanent head Damage" in the way he behaves and acts.
Those who know me know I go for intellectual power. But intellectual power does not necessary mean someone with very high qualifications, although a normal graduate is preferred. A few more years of studying does make a difference in perception and attitude. Intellectual power also comes from one's life experiences, and one's values and attitudes towards life, the upbringing and exposure.
In other words, someone who is a graduate and earning a decent income, well-read, well-travelled, cultured, knowledgeable, articulate, keeps up to date with the times, willing to live life to the fullest and try new things, chivalrous, and has a good flair of the language makes a very lethal combination to me.
But anyway I have come across my share of weirdos from all walks of life, and I believe I have learnt how to get rid of these people without working myself up into a fluster. Still, there will always be a few that is hard to get rid of, a few that will always be hard to crack.
For instance, I was so stressed with my examinations last week that I hardly had the time to entertain others. I was in a bad mood, worried about my grades, wondering about how my score would be like. So I was really not in the right mood to deal with weirdos. Yet, even after I told others to leave me alone, one or two will still insist on exchanging messages.
I was back at work on Friday, but I was so busy trying to clear things that were accumulated from Thursday. When someone called me, I was too flustered to talk so I told him I was busy. And he said, "I thought you said you were on leave the whole week? How come you are at work? Lying to me is it?"
Yes, I was on leave for the week, but my examination ended on Thursday, so of course I had to be back at work on Friday! With all his qualifications, he did not even know something like this?! Granted, he caught me at the wrong time, but still, what makes him think I will feel any better when he said that?
Friday evening, I was feeling a bit sick, so decided to just go home and sleep the night away. Before I even reached home, he sent me a message asking if he could call me. So I said I was not home yet, if he wished to he could call me later. Then he asked how late, so I just gave a random answer of fifteen minutes.
The moment I reached home, he sent me another message, asking if he could call me then. So I replied that I just reached home, could he let me chill out first? And he then sent another message, saying why could I not let him call me since I have already reached home? Erh... when a person just reached home, he / she needs some time to unwind first right? Unless it is a very good or close friend of mine who calls me because of a problem, otherwise I will prefer to rest a while first.
A while later, I went online and he was there. So we started chatting. He asked if he could call me then so I said okay, but he said since we were both online, we might as well chat. Fine with me, since I was really feeling tired and not in the mood to really talk to people. We chatted for a while, then he asked if he could call me.
So I said actually I was tired and preferred to rest. He then said why did I say he could call me then changed my story altogether? Erh, we were already chatting online, and I was really tired. I see no reason why he needed to call me when we were already chatting online.
He then requested for a photo of me, to which I said I just changed into my laptop so I did not have any photo in my notebook as yet, which is true! He accused me of giving so many excuses, to which I said if that was how he felt then there was nothing I could do, and I was really tired so I would appreciate if he could let me rest.
A few days later, he sent me a message asking if I would like to meet. He wanted to meet me in an hour's time, and he asked me one hour beforehand? So I said I was not free because I was in church. He then asked what about anytime during the week, but I just happened to be busy for the week.
He asked what about the following week. I said the following week should be fine, but which day I have to confirm again. He asked why could I not give him a day and time, so I said I could only confirm nearer the day because I could not be sure if anything would suddenly crop up, and if I fix a day only to cancel it would not be very nice.
Yet, he accused me of stringing him along, and said if I did not wish to meet, just say so, did not need to give so many excuses! When did I say I did not wish to meet? I just did not want to confirm so fast in case something crops up! And I was really tight this week, because I shifted everything I needed to do after my examinations!
From this, I feel that he is someone self-centred, rigid and inflexible. It is like just because he asked someone out, the person must cater to him, no matter what time, how late the notice is, without considering that people have their own lives and own moods as well, and people's lives are much bigger than just catering to him alone!
So the verdict? I had him thrown out. Not literally, but well, I stopped talking to him altogether, stopped entertaining his messages and I actually told him what I felt. One thing I am most uncomfortable about is someone being so pushy, then gets all whiny and accusing just because his demands are not met.
No doubt he wants to find someone to be with, but if he is going to be so pushy and have this kind of attitude, who will be willing to go out with him? Most will be scared off already. Having said that, I came across a quotation from Gabriel Marquez, "No man is worth crying over. The one that is will never make you cry." Well said! In another way, no man is worth being frustrated and angry over. The one that is will never make you frustrated and angry.
Of course not everyone is like that. My cousin-in-law is pursuing a doctorate degree, and he is a very normal, decent, nice guy with absolutely no airs. But the same cannot be said about another person I came across, who really justifies a "Permanent head Damage" in the way he behaves and acts.
Those who know me know I go for intellectual power. But intellectual power does not necessary mean someone with very high qualifications, although a normal graduate is preferred. A few more years of studying does make a difference in perception and attitude. Intellectual power also comes from one's life experiences, and one's values and attitudes towards life, the upbringing and exposure.
In other words, someone who is a graduate and earning a decent income, well-read, well-travelled, cultured, knowledgeable, articulate, keeps up to date with the times, willing to live life to the fullest and try new things, chivalrous, and has a good flair of the language makes a very lethal combination to me.
But anyway I have come across my share of weirdos from all walks of life, and I believe I have learnt how to get rid of these people without working myself up into a fluster. Still, there will always be a few that is hard to get rid of, a few that will always be hard to crack.
For instance, I was so stressed with my examinations last week that I hardly had the time to entertain others. I was in a bad mood, worried about my grades, wondering about how my score would be like. So I was really not in the right mood to deal with weirdos. Yet, even after I told others to leave me alone, one or two will still insist on exchanging messages.
I was back at work on Friday, but I was so busy trying to clear things that were accumulated from Thursday. When someone called me, I was too flustered to talk so I told him I was busy. And he said, "I thought you said you were on leave the whole week? How come you are at work? Lying to me is it?"
Yes, I was on leave for the week, but my examination ended on Thursday, so of course I had to be back at work on Friday! With all his qualifications, he did not even know something like this?! Granted, he caught me at the wrong time, but still, what makes him think I will feel any better when he said that?
Friday evening, I was feeling a bit sick, so decided to just go home and sleep the night away. Before I even reached home, he sent me a message asking if he could call me. So I said I was not home yet, if he wished to he could call me later. Then he asked how late, so I just gave a random answer of fifteen minutes.
The moment I reached home, he sent me another message, asking if he could call me then. So I replied that I just reached home, could he let me chill out first? And he then sent another message, saying why could I not let him call me since I have already reached home? Erh... when a person just reached home, he / she needs some time to unwind first right? Unless it is a very good or close friend of mine who calls me because of a problem, otherwise I will prefer to rest a while first.
A while later, I went online and he was there. So we started chatting. He asked if he could call me then so I said okay, but he said since we were both online, we might as well chat. Fine with me, since I was really feeling tired and not in the mood to really talk to people. We chatted for a while, then he asked if he could call me.
So I said actually I was tired and preferred to rest. He then said why did I say he could call me then changed my story altogether? Erh, we were already chatting online, and I was really tired. I see no reason why he needed to call me when we were already chatting online.
He then requested for a photo of me, to which I said I just changed into my laptop so I did not have any photo in my notebook as yet, which is true! He accused me of giving so many excuses, to which I said if that was how he felt then there was nothing I could do, and I was really tired so I would appreciate if he could let me rest.
A few days later, he sent me a message asking if I would like to meet. He wanted to meet me in an hour's time, and he asked me one hour beforehand? So I said I was not free because I was in church. He then asked what about anytime during the week, but I just happened to be busy for the week.
He asked what about the following week. I said the following week should be fine, but which day I have to confirm again. He asked why could I not give him a day and time, so I said I could only confirm nearer the day because I could not be sure if anything would suddenly crop up, and if I fix a day only to cancel it would not be very nice.
Yet, he accused me of stringing him along, and said if I did not wish to meet, just say so, did not need to give so many excuses! When did I say I did not wish to meet? I just did not want to confirm so fast in case something crops up! And I was really tight this week, because I shifted everything I needed to do after my examinations!
From this, I feel that he is someone self-centred, rigid and inflexible. It is like just because he asked someone out, the person must cater to him, no matter what time, how late the notice is, without considering that people have their own lives and own moods as well, and people's lives are much bigger than just catering to him alone!
So the verdict? I had him thrown out. Not literally, but well, I stopped talking to him altogether, stopped entertaining his messages and I actually told him what I felt. One thing I am most uncomfortable about is someone being so pushy, then gets all whiny and accusing just because his demands are not met.
No doubt he wants to find someone to be with, but if he is going to be so pushy and have this kind of attitude, who will be willing to go out with him? Most will be scared off already. Having said that, I came across a quotation from Gabriel Marquez, "No man is worth crying over. The one that is will never make you cry." Well said! In another way, no man is worth being frustrated and angry over. The one that is will never make you frustrated and angry.
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