Is The Younger Generation Becoming Softer And Weaker?

I met my friend for dinner on Friday before my RCIA. She needed my help in preparing for her SATs, as she wanted to further her studies in USA. I told her that it had been so long since I took my SATs, and if I retake now, I will probably fail the entire test, thus I do not think I can help her much. But we did catch up on old times. She was in the same batch as my second ex, and said she is still in contact with him as he would email her the monthly Law Digest and other forms of e-mails. What I questioned was that how come he is in charge of the alumni e-mail and how come I never receive any Law Digest from anyone? Or maybe the digest is just for actual graduates.

But my friend is one lady I have always admired. Her dad's business used to be in Indonesia, but after the financial crisis few years back, he was declared a bankrupt. She almost dropped out of school, but in the end, took on weekend jobs and several tuition assignments to see herself through school. Once she started working, she had to support her entire family and put her younger brother through his education. Now that her brother has completed his studies, she could go further her studies.

I really admire her strength! Honestly, I will crumble in the same situation. She is one who managed to pick herself up despite becoming from riches-to-rags, and still able to laugh about it. Not many people are able to do that. My ex could not; he wanted to carry on the same lifestyle as before his family's business suffered. If it is me in this situation, I am not sure if I can pick myself up that well. I have seen how hard it is for people used to luxury to simplify their lifestyles. Not that I lead a very luxurious life in the first place. I, too, have to give tuition and take on vacation jobs throughout university just to earn more pocket money to pay my phone bills.

But with all these higher education and affluence of society, are people getting softer and weaker? Is the younger generation (my generation and below) taking things more and more for granted, and cannot be compared to how the older generation struggled and toiled just to be able to survive?

For many people during my parents' generation, their own parents deemed bread-and-butter issues as more important, and with the big families of old, the unfortunate elder children often had to sacrifice book learning and went out to work early just so to help the parents support the family. It was normally the youngest child that had the chance to complete university. There were reports that these kids after completing their English university education, looked down on his / her entire family and cut off all ties with them, forgetting that his / her elder siblings sacrificed their own schooling just to send him / her to school. Of course, these cases were just few and far in between.

But children growing up in these poor and uneducated families were often the hungriest when it came to education. They saw how their parents struggled, thus they yearned to have a good education so they could take care of their parents, and their own families and younger generation would have a good life.

So these children have no qualms working to earn money, studying and helping out around the house. Whatever money was used to pay their school fees, and they had only one pair of shoes and two pairs of uniforms which had to last them one week. They had to wash their own clothes and shoes with their hands (as washing machines were still unheard of). There was no luxury like radio or television (too expensive), and even going to the movies was out of the question. Some of these children were lucky enough to receive scholarships or bursaries which helped in their university education; others, like my parents, had to work and study at the same time.

When it came to job hunting, they could not afford to be choosy due to all the loans and bills incurred in their university education, thus took the first job at hand. And they really went all out in their work so as to earn money to support their parents and start a family and give their children a good life. They have no qualms working so much as they are used to a hard life.

There are many people like my parents. However, after my parents generation, the next generation seems to get worse and worse. Perhaps it is due to parents the same generation of my parents who went through the same sufferings and, like my parents, wanted to give their children a good life, thus these children of my generation (and later) have too good a life. As a result, they took things for granted and run away at the first signs of inconvenience or suffering. I am not saying all are like that. There are still very sensible young people out there as well.

But there are a growing number of youngsters nowadays who take schooling for granted. How many reports are there nowadays of juvenile delinquents who play truant, smoke, join gangs and show blatant disrespect to teachers and principals? As compared to my time where caning and hitting the kid was still allowed, nowadays teachers and principals are not even allowed to touch the kid in any way. Even a mere scolding too harshly or putting down the kid is not allowed, as parents will come and complain about the teacher "ill-treating" their kid and making their precious darling cry. Even if the kid gets too much homework a day is not allowed as well, as kids also need their lives, according to their parents. Staying back is not allowed as well as the kid may have tuition or other activities. Keeping in during recess is also not allowed as the poor kid will starve if he / she does not eat anything.

With all these forms of punishment being disallowed, how is the errant student ever going to learn any lesson? Is it any wonder that more and more kids are showing so much disrespect to teachers and have a blatant distaste to the school? What an irony that just twenty years or so ago, kids of that era were dying to remain in school no matter what it took, even with their teachers swinging canes everyday, yet with all the non-touching of kids and non-punishment in this day and age, more and more kids are unwilling to go to school.

More and more youngsters are also choosy over jobs. They are not willing to have a job that pays too little, or have too much overtime, or needs to work weekends, or has no chance to travel abroad, or are too far away from where they live. My mum told me a few examples of those scholars in her company who only knows how to score straight 'A's, but totally clueless when it comes to work, and worse, get very arrogant just because they are scholars.

There was this scholar who was given an Assistant Accounts Manager post immediately after she graduated. She was unhappy about it as she thought she could immediately start off as a Manager. After her six-month probation, she asked my mum if she could be promoted to the managerial post. My mum told her it was already very good that she could start off as an Assistant Manager in the first place already as other scholars would start off as a senior executive at best. The girl was not satisfied and wrote an appeal to the big boss himself, but he was angry with her arrogance and refused her request.

Then there was one meeting where the team was brainstorming ideas, and her ideas were not used, so she told everyone off by not accepting her ideas. She went home to complain to her parents, and the next day, both her parents came in with a resignation letter and a cheque amounting to the remaining amount of her bond. Now, what are her parents teaching her? If they shelter her so much, how is she going to learn the hard facts of working life?

My mum had other subordinates who quitted one by one because they were not willing to work overtime, or on weekends. There was this lady who resigned as she was working up to 10:00 pm for a whole week, but the company would reimburse her transport and dinner, as well as give her time off for the extra hours she put in, yet she felt she was being exploited so resigned. Honestly, which other company would give her such a good deal? I have been working lots of overtime, sometimes to midnight even, with no extra pay, and no transport or food allowances and definitely no time off either.

Perhaps this is why youngsters are taking life easier and easier as they think things will ultimately work out for them. Maybe some of these are due to the parents - how parents will want to give their children a good and comfortable life, thus softening them in the process. Plus the fact that compared to families with ten children in the past, nowadays most families have an average of three or four children at the most, so all the kids could be pampered and sheltered, some more than the rest.

Even in my family, all along we have a domestic servant, so I have to confess that I do not need to make my bed in the morning, nor do my own laundry, or iron my clothes. During mealtimes, I just need to sit at the dining table and food will appear. After eating, I can just leave my bowl and chopsticks on the dining table (or wherever else I eat) and they will be cleared. I do not even need to carry my dishes to the sink and put them in it. Even with my room being messy, I do not need to clean it, as it will be cleaned periodically. But that is not to say I cannot do any form of housework whatsoever. Living in university hostels away from home made me learn how to do things on my own.

Compared to my parents, I am living a much more comfortable life, as they provide me with it. My mum did not even have a bed to sleep on, just a small thin mattress. She could not even go shopping for clothes nor have chicken or red meat except during Chinese New Year, and even then, her brothers normally got the bigger chunks. She had to make all her clothes herself. My dad did not even have a room, he had to sleep on the floor along the corridor. He said army life during his time was also so much tougher and harsher as compared to now, yet more and more army guys nowadays are still complaining that the army life here sucks. Perhaps it was due to their comfortable upbringing? I am not saying that army life does not suck; it probably does, but I believe the life is already a lot better as compared to the pioneer batch of National Servicemen.

Maybe people of my parents' generations suffered and lived in poverty since young, thus they know not to take life for granted, which explains their strong resilience. And the younger generation has been living in comfort since young, thus take everything for granted, so run away from any minor problems. Perhaps youngsters are really getting softer and weaker, which I fear of how the country may become, seeing it is the younger generation that may be running the country next time.