Another night of tossing, turning and tearing. Sometimes I wonder if I am more upset over the fact that my heart was broken again, or that I am not as strong as I thought I was. What a sense of deja vu. The same pattern over and over again. Sleepless nights, staring into space, could not focus on anything, felt like throwing things around.
Which got me reflecting on how I used to cope. When my first relationship ended, it was after my JC2 mid-year examinations. Apparently he had been two-timing me with this pretty girl in his class for a few weeks already, but only dumped me at that point of time, as he "did not want to affect my exams." Ooooooo.... how "kind" of him. During the June holidays, I went on a crazy mission to revamp myself. I cut my hair off really short (the one hair decision I ever regretted, as I looked like a freak) and switched to contact lenses. But I was pretty messed up. Sleepless nights, coupled with non-concentration made me almost screw up my preliminary examinations and had to give up all my 3 'S' papers. As a result, I did not score as well for my 'A' Level examinations, only 3As and 1C, and my dream of an overseas scholarship was shattered.
My second relationship ended when I was much older. Again, I was dumped, this time for an air-stewardess. For a period of time, I really hated all those pretty gorgeous girls around. The same symptoms, sleeples nights, non-concentration, bingeing. This happened during the December school holidays when I was still a teacher. Thus, I had a month at my disposal. I turned into a real couch potato - eating chips and watching DVDs. I finished the entire Winter Sonata series in 4 days. I ate every hour, at whatever I could lay my hands on. Needless to say, I suffered the consequences by putting on 10kg. I ballooned from 45kg to 55 kg within 2 weeks. Until in the end, my best friend gave me a lecture - it's only a broken relationship. Life goes on, he's not worth my time. Why did I have to torment myself this way? That really woke me up and I went on a mission to lose weight and revamped my image. I took up grooming and etiquette classes, rebonded my hair, started putting on makeup and dressing up more.
Thus, I believe I should be able to cope. Perhaps I could get over this sooner than I expected. 2 sleepless nights had taken a toil on me. My supervisor came back and asked if I was alright as she said I looked bad. Hmmmm, perhaps I could justify taking MC tomorrow.
Which got me reflecting on how I used to cope. When my first relationship ended, it was after my JC2 mid-year examinations. Apparently he had been two-timing me with this pretty girl in his class for a few weeks already, but only dumped me at that point of time, as he "did not want to affect my exams." Ooooooo.... how "kind" of him. During the June holidays, I went on a crazy mission to revamp myself. I cut my hair off really short (the one hair decision I ever regretted, as I looked like a freak) and switched to contact lenses. But I was pretty messed up. Sleepless nights, coupled with non-concentration made me almost screw up my preliminary examinations and had to give up all my 3 'S' papers. As a result, I did not score as well for my 'A' Level examinations, only 3As and 1C, and my dream of an overseas scholarship was shattered.
My second relationship ended when I was much older. Again, I was dumped, this time for an air-stewardess. For a period of time, I really hated all those pretty gorgeous girls around. The same symptoms, sleeples nights, non-concentration, bingeing. This happened during the December school holidays when I was still a teacher. Thus, I had a month at my disposal. I turned into a real couch potato - eating chips and watching DVDs. I finished the entire Winter Sonata series in 4 days. I ate every hour, at whatever I could lay my hands on. Needless to say, I suffered the consequences by putting on 10kg. I ballooned from 45kg to 55 kg within 2 weeks. Until in the end, my best friend gave me a lecture - it's only a broken relationship. Life goes on, he's not worth my time. Why did I have to torment myself this way? That really woke me up and I went on a mission to lose weight and revamped my image. I took up grooming and etiquette classes, rebonded my hair, started putting on makeup and dressing up more.
Thus, I believe I should be able to cope. Perhaps I could get over this sooner than I expected. 2 sleepless nights had taken a toil on me. My supervisor came back and asked if I was alright as she said I looked bad. Hmmmm, perhaps I could justify taking MC tomorrow.
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