Lilypie

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Choices ....

Choices. One word that can have a huge impact on an individual’s life. It is entirely due to our choices that our lives are running the way they are. Everyone has a choice – to live, to die, to love, to hate, to be good, to be bad. The onus is on whether we want to make the choice. Once a choice is made, we have to live with it.

Certain things in life cannot be chosen. For instance, we are all born to a set of parents, thus we cannot choose our parents. But it is our parents’ choice how they want to bring us up. My parents chose to bring me up in a certain way. But I can choose whether to follow their way. I make my own choice in terms of religion, love life, career, interests.

Would things have been different if I have made certain choices? Possibly. Like if I chose another friend of mine over my first ex-boyfriend, would I have ended up happier? Hard to say. If I have not chosen my second ex-boyfriend, I am sure I would not have wasted six years of my life and youth, the best years of my life, when I could have gone around meeting other guys. If I had not chosen my third ex-boyfriend, I would have started out with another good friend of mine. A pity I met him too late. Now that I am no longer attached, he just got himself attached. A pity, but very happy for him though. Just like I made a choice to love a particular person, and made the same choice to give up my pursuit. Whatever happens I have to live with the choices I made.

Life is full of choices. It is hard to determine which choices are right or wrong. I could have been more successful if I have stuck with law, but would I have been happier? Besides the fact that I am still working in a law firm, I would not have been happy at all if I am to be a real practicing lawyer. I thought making the choice to teach was the best choice in my life, but it turned out to be a wrong choice. How can anyone know whether it is the right or wrong choice until you have actually made the choice and faced whatever consequences that come your way?

The worse thing that can ever happen to anyone is to make the wrong choice for a life partner. If it is the right choice, both parties will be blessed with happiness and love for the rest of their lives. But if it is the wrong choice, both parties will suffer in terms of frequent quarrels, arguments, infidelity, and even abuse. But how do you know the person is right for you? The best way is to know what type you want. All my guys more or less have the same positive traits. Now that I have narrowed down even more, I am looking at only a particular type of guy who can fulfill at least 80% of my criteria.

Just like right now, the guy whom I have rejected twice asked me again. I must say he is persistent though. So shall I give him a chance? I still do not feel anything for him. But someone once told me love can be nurtured through time. Is it? I always think it is very unfair to the other person if you accept him / her without feeling anything special towards him / her. And what if I made the wrong choice again? I do not think I can ever bear being hurt again.

I guess there is no such thing as a “right” or “wrong” choice then. Whatever one chooses it is on a trial and error basis to see if the choice is good or bad. If the luck is there, it will be a good choice. If not, then it is a bad choice, so just give up, learn from your mistake and move on. Thus whatever choice one makes in life, we have to live with it, because it is the path we have chosen for ourselves.

2 comments:

Ole' Wolvie said...

Every choice comes with a price.

Question is: Can you afford it?

*feeling sagacious today...*

shakespeareheroine said...

I know every choice comes with a price. So whatever happens we have to pay the price. Just like I have paid the price for makign wrong choices, no matter how unaffordable it is. But since it's what I have chosen, just have to live with it and try to make a better choice next time.

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