One of my friends just asked me the other day, "How do you know you are in love?" I answered, "You just know." She countered, "How do you know it is true love, and not just a physical attraction?" Erm, I was a little stumped after that. How to answer a question like this?
I got to reflecting on the feelings I felt over the years. Which one of my guys did I ever experience true love and not just physical attraction? I told her that I think the easiest way to determine is to see if you fall for the character and mentality, not just physical appearance. Even then, that is a little hard to gauge because one does not know a person truly well until one has been in a relationship with him / her for a period of time. What may attract you in the beginning may later turn out to be something you hate.
If you truly love someone, you will want the person to be happy. You will try your best to make the person happy. I have no qualms being at my boyfriend's beck and call if he is the one I truly love. I used to think what I would do if he and I ever start off. Seems like what I would do for him would be even more than what I had been doing for my ex-boyfriends. Maybe he was the person I truly love the most. He was the person I was willing to change for, cook for, clean the house for. When I thought of all these, I was really surprised at myself. I had never even thought of doing any of those for any of my ex-boyfriends. Even though they imposed on me and I still did, but I had never thought of voluntarily cooking or cleaning for them. But few weeks back when my feelings for someone was so strong, I even wanted to be his housekeeper! All the ditzy notions.
Did I not love my ex-boyfriends then? I believe I loved them all, some more than the others. But I guess you will be most willing to do things for the one you love the most. My first two boyfriends did more for their subsequent girlfriends, and my most recent one did more for his former ex-girlfriend. I used to be upset as I was always the one who had to do more, but what is the use? One cannot love to order. Until one truly fall for someone else, then one will experience the over-powering urge to do so much for the other person. If you truly love a person, you will not mind doing so much more.
Right now I know of at least two guys who may be pursuing me. I am in the process of considering one of them. Why the reservation and hesitation? Somehow the feeling is not there. We get along well, we think alike, we are both chocoholics and like the same type of food and eating places, we have similar ideals in life, and he is a born, baptised and confirmed Catholic, but somehow, I do not foresee myself doing a lot for him. Or maybe still not yet. Until my feelings become even stronger than how I felt for a certain someone, or until I meet the person who can trigger off stronger feelings in me, otherwise I will still be keeping my options open.
I got to reflecting on the feelings I felt over the years. Which one of my guys did I ever experience true love and not just physical attraction? I told her that I think the easiest way to determine is to see if you fall for the character and mentality, not just physical appearance. Even then, that is a little hard to gauge because one does not know a person truly well until one has been in a relationship with him / her for a period of time. What may attract you in the beginning may later turn out to be something you hate.
If you truly love someone, you will want the person to be happy. You will try your best to make the person happy. I have no qualms being at my boyfriend's beck and call if he is the one I truly love. I used to think what I would do if he and I ever start off. Seems like what I would do for him would be even more than what I had been doing for my ex-boyfriends. Maybe he was the person I truly love the most. He was the person I was willing to change for, cook for, clean the house for. When I thought of all these, I was really surprised at myself. I had never even thought of doing any of those for any of my ex-boyfriends. Even though they imposed on me and I still did, but I had never thought of voluntarily cooking or cleaning for them. But few weeks back when my feelings for someone was so strong, I even wanted to be his housekeeper! All the ditzy notions.
Did I not love my ex-boyfriends then? I believe I loved them all, some more than the others. But I guess you will be most willing to do things for the one you love the most. My first two boyfriends did more for their subsequent girlfriends, and my most recent one did more for his former ex-girlfriend. I used to be upset as I was always the one who had to do more, but what is the use? One cannot love to order. Until one truly fall for someone else, then one will experience the over-powering urge to do so much for the other person. If you truly love a person, you will not mind doing so much more.
Right now I know of at least two guys who may be pursuing me. I am in the process of considering one of them. Why the reservation and hesitation? Somehow the feeling is not there. We get along well, we think alike, we are both chocoholics and like the same type of food and eating places, we have similar ideals in life, and he is a born, baptised and confirmed Catholic, but somehow, I do not foresee myself doing a lot for him. Or maybe still not yet. Until my feelings become even stronger than how I felt for a certain someone, or until I meet the person who can trigger off stronger feelings in me, otherwise I will still be keeping my options open.
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